struggling with decision- why so ugly here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am one of those parents that apparently lots of you love to hate- struggling with the decision of where to send my child next year. Yes I understand it's a "nice problem to have" - but it's still the thing I am struggling with at the moment, trying to make the best decision for my child based on what I know of her thus far. She's only 8, I don't know who she will be in 2 or 3 years or what will be right for her then and so I've been very conflicted- which is not a comfortable feeling. I have to imagine that every parent out there has had similar moments and I cannot for the life of me understand why this site always gets overrun by the loudest and least supportive voices out there. I logged in to hear advice/opinions of other parents weighing similar considerations and am shocked by how nasty some of these strings become. I understand that there is a great social and moral debate going on out there about public school education but seriously- when you see the forum subject, the topic is pretty clear. I'm appalled by how parents are so quick to attack and mock other parents. I'm reminded of how many years ago, struggling with an infant who would not breastfeed, I logged onto this site to ask a question and was promptly attacked by hysterical, angry people who questioned my love for my child if I would even consider "quitting". Not quite the support I was looking for then and 8 years later....... I'm not even going to try this time. I have to say that I'm wondering how concerned I should be about what my child is going to face in school from people whose parents think this behavior is okay.

OP, thankfully I did not know about DCUM when I made the decision to send my DC to the AAP center. I so much wanted to stay in the neighborhood, but the neighbors told me the base school was a joke and many complaints -- they all sent their kids to the center school, so I did also. Did not find it elicits at the center school -- it was a much better fit. So -- ask your neighbors?

[Anonymous]

^^ elitist

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

There are no valedictorians in Fairfax County schools. There are no class rankings and haven't been for some time.

And, my DC was a valedictorian before the change. And, it hasn't been that much time. For the record, it was before they gave extra GPA for Honors.

So, your experience as the parent of a rising 3rd grader is at least more than a decade old, probably more.

[Anonymous]

Yes. You obviously don't want to hear from the voice of experience. Has it occurred to you that I may have other children?

[Anonymous]

Yes. You obviously don't want to hear from the voice of experience. Has it occurred to you that I may have other children?

The question at hand was from a parent who wanted to hear about the experience of others. For the record, I made the decision when the program was much more selective--therefore, my child's scores were probably much higher than those being discussed here.

[Anonymous]

I'm also grateful I had not heard of DCUM when deciding whether to send my kid to the center or stay for LLIV. This was 5 years ago. My IRL experience at 3 different FCPS elementary schools is that no one talks about this stuff IRL. I had NO idea there was this level of angst about the AAP program!

FWIW, I kept my older child at our LLIV for thirs and then sent her to the center for grades 4-6. I liked having the choice since she was one of those "dreaded" AAP kids with a diagnosis, so finding a good fit for her was not so easy. It was more a matter of the least worst fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Yes. You obviously don't want to hear from the voice of experience. Has it occurred to you that I may have other children?

The question at hand was from a parent who wanted to hear about the experience of others. For the record, I made the decision when the program was much more selective--therefore, my child's scores were probably much higher than those being discussed here.

+100 You probably didn't prep your child either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Yes. You obviously don't want to hear from the voice of experience. Has it occurred to you that I may have other children?

The question at hand was from a parent who wanted to hear about the experience of others. For the record, I made the decision when the program was much more selective--therefore, my child's scores were probably much higher than those being discussed here.

When you made the decision SOLs were not such a big part- they were non-existent or in their infancy. Class sizes were smaller too. Quite a bit has changed in the past 15+ years. I don't think your experience is as relevant as you seem to think it is. Your post only talked about your one child and her experience -not of any other children you may or may not have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Yes. You obviously don't want to hear from the voice of experience. Has it occurred to you that I may have other children?

The question at hand was from a parent who wanted to hear about the experience of others. For the record, I made the decision when the program was much more selective--therefore, my child's scores were probably much higher than those being discussed here.

When you made the decision SOLs were not such a big part- they were non-existent or in their infancy. Class sizes were smaller too. Quite a bit has changed in the past 15+ years. I don't think your experience is as relevant as you seem to think it is. Your post only talked about your one child and her experience -not of any other children you may or may not have.

NP here. I had same experience as PP seven years ago when AAP was still GT and my child was referred by the AART to the program with near perfect scores on all tests (unprepped), presumably high GBRS and not one finger lifted by me to get child in. To all involved it wasn't even a question. Reading these forums today, that often seems to be more the exception.

[Anonymous]

When you made the decision SOLs were not such a big part- they were non-existent or in their infancy. Class sizes were smaller too. Quite a bit has changed in the past 15+ years. I don't think your experience is as relevant as you seem to think it is. Your post only talked about your one child and her experience -not of any other children you may or may not have.

Yes, SOLs were in their infancy--but she did have them. And, as I implied earlier, I have other, younger children. Class sizes in her school were large.

[Anonymous]

cont. one of the problems with DD's friends who were in GT center was the adjustment to high school. They expected to always be at the top of the class. Some of her friends who went to GT center are still adjusting to this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Yes. You obviously don't want to hear from the voice of experience. Has it occurred to you that I may have other children?

The question at hand was from a parent who wanted to hear about the experience of others. For the record, I made the decision when the program was much more selective--therefore, my child's scores were probably much higher than those being discussed here.

When you made the decision SOLs were not such a big part- they were non-existent or in their infancy. Class sizes were smaller too. Quite a bit has changed in the past 15+ years. I don't think your experience is as relevant as you seem to think it is. Your post only talked about your one child and her experience -not of any other children you may or may not have.

NP here. I had same experience as PP seven years ago when AAP was still GT and my child was referred by the AART to the program with near perfect scores on all tests (unprepped), presumably high GBRS and not one finger lifted by me to get child in. To all involved it wasn't even a question. Reading these forums today, that often seems to be more the exception.

The county has been using the term "AAP" since 2004 at the very latest (very, very easy to look this up). So your seven-year statement doesn't add up...just one of many inconsistencies when the detractors swoop in to tell their stories (and I'd estimate about 75% of them are indeed stories, not facts).

I normally ignore the trolls, but I do like catching them on blatant lies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm also grateful I had not heard of DCUM when deciding whether to send my kid to the center or stay for LLIV. This was 5 years ago. My IRL experience at 3 different FCPS elementary schools is that no one talks about this stuff IRL. I had NO idea there was this level of angst about the AAP program!

FWIW, I kept my older child at our LLIV for thirs and then sent her to the center for grades 4-6. I liked having the choice since she was one of those "dreaded" AAP kids with a diagnosis, so finding a good fit for her was not so easy. It was more a matter of the least worst fit.

+1000

Similar experience here with DS (now in 7th grade) and DD (now in 4th grade).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Yes. You obviously don't want to hear from the voice of experience. Has it occurred to you that I may have other children?

The question at hand was from a parent who wanted to hear about the experience of others. For the record, I made the decision when the program was much more selective--therefore, my child's scores were probably much higher than those being discussed here.

When you made the decision SOLs were not such a big part- they were non-existent or in their infancy. Class sizes were smaller too. Quite a bit has changed in the past 15+ years. I don't think your experience is as relevant as you seem to think it is. Your post only talked about your one child and her experience -not of any other children you may or may not have.

NP here. I had same experience as PP seven years ago when AAP was still GT and my child was referred by the AART to the program with near perfect scores on all tests (unprepped), presumably high GBRS and not one finger lifted by me to get child in. To all involved it wasn't even a question. Reading these forums today, that often seems to be more the exception.

The county has been using the term "AAP" since 2004 at the very latest (very, very easy to look this up). So your seven-year statement doesn't add up...just one of many inconsistencies when the detractors swoop in to tell their stories (and I'd estimate about 75% of them are indeed stories, not facts).

I normally ignore the trolls, but I do like catching them on blatant lies.

Actually, you did catch me in one error -- it was 2006 when my child went in, so that would make it close to 8 years ago, I guess. But the rest is completely accurate. At the time no matter what is says on any website, the AART at my child's elementary and all the forms we filled out were for the GT program. When DC went to Louise Archer DC was welcomed into the GT program. They only really started calling it something different the following school year, when the incoming second graders started to call it AA for Advanced Academics. I suppose it became more common to hear AAP, when enough people complained about the similarity to Alcoholic Anonymous.

So please, don't try to tell someone who was actually there what the facts were. OP wanted to hear from folks with actual experience or I would not have posted here.

[Anonymous]

The OP did NOT want to hear from folks with actual experience. If you read the original question--which detractors never do, because they are so intent on pushing their own agenda--you will see she is asking why things are so ugly on this board.

Are you saying things are ugly on this board because your child had near-perfect scores on the tests in 2006?

I didn't think so.

Whether you meant to or not, you and several others on this thread are again hijacking it for your own purposes, whether it is "I hate AAP" or "AAP was only worthwhile when my kid was in it." Neither of those viewpoints are helpful to those looking for answers in this forum.