Struggling with idea of getting DC baptized

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's the problem if you don't have him baptized? Who would know?

The problem is the child will go to hell if s/he dies. This isn't about who "knows."

If heaven is full of people who think this way I'll take my chances in hell.

Hey, OP is Catholic. That's the dogma. That's the issue she's struggling with. How dare you be so smug and intolerant?

That's actually NOT the dogma.

[Anonymous]

You have to decide.

1. Are you going to raise your child with a Religion (any religion)? If yes,
2. Do you want it to be Catholic or do you want to learn a whole new religion

(This is where I stopped, because I think they all basically teach the same thing.)

Also, there is cultural things that go with religion. So you could be culturally Catholic but not actually religious, which means you follow all the traditions but don't do the sacraments. My brother did this but his daughter at 16 wanted the sacraments and ended up going to Catholic college. Which is funny, he is so against the Catholic church but he had to chill out.

If you have family that is Catholic, you more than likely will be doing the cultural stuff anyway.

You really don't have to blindly follow the Catholic Faith. I am very liberal and I am Catholic.

Do I believe in XYZ? not always... questioning religion is the responsiblity of a good member, otherwise it is a cult.

Get Catholics for Dummies, read it and decide if you want to be Catholic.

Personally, I am teaching my kids that there is 1 God who manifests himself to everybody a different way. Our family learned about God and spirituality through the Catholic Church, so we follow those teachings. No religion is perfect because it invovles imperfect people.

If you have questions about specific teachings and how other Catholics resolve themselves to those teachings this may be a good place to ask them.

I believe that gay people should have the right to marry, it is a goverment thing (separation of church and state).
I don't care that women are not priests because I feel they have a different role in the church and it does not bother me.
I believe that a sin is a sin, everybody does it and it is not a big deal, move on. It is not between me and you, it is between me and God, your sins are between you and God. He does not need my help.

Sorry, a bit of a ramble and I am sure there are spelling mistakes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's the problem if you don't have him baptized? Who would know?

The problem is the child will go to hell if s/he dies. This isn't about who "knows."

But it sounds like OP doesn't believe what you believe PP. Isn't she basically asking why she should baptize when she just doesn't believe in the reson for baptism?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's the problem if you don't have him baptized? Who would know?

The problem is the child will go to hell if s/he dies. This isn't about who "knows."

Prove it. And don't refer to any ancient book, either. I believe all ancient books are equal, filled with mythology and tales of caution and life lessons. It's in the bible doesn't cut it for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's the problem if you don't have him baptized? Who would know?

The problem is the child will go to hell if s/he dies. This isn't about who "knows."

If heaven is full of people who think this way I'll take my chances in hell.

Hey, OP is Catholic. That's the dogma. That's the issue she's struggling with. How dare you be so smug and intolerant?

That's actually NOT the dogma.

OP here. My grandmother followed this line of thought from the old days. Unfortunately it didn't pair well with her OCD. It's stuff like this I refuse to taint my kid with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have to decide.

1. Are you going to raise your child with a Religion (any religion)? If yes,
2. Do you want it to be Catholic or do you want to learn a whole new religion

(This is where I stopped, because I think they all basically teach the same thing.)

Also, there is cultural things that go with religion. So you could be culturally Catholic but not actually religious, which means you follow all the traditions but don't do the sacraments. My brother did this but his daughter at 16 wanted the sacraments and ended up going to Catholic college. Which is funny, he is so against the Catholic church but he had to chill out.

If you have family that is Catholic, you more than likely will be doing the cultural stuff anyway.

You really don't have to blindly follow the Catholic Faith. I am very liberal and I am Catholic.

Do I believe in XYZ? not always... questioning religion is the responsiblity of a good member, otherwise it is a cult.

Get Catholics for Dummies, read it and decide if you want to be Catholic.

Personally, I am teaching my kids that there is 1 God who manifests himself to everybody a different way. Our family learned about God and spirituality through the Catholic Church, so we follow those teachings. No religion is perfect because it invovles imperfect people.

If you have questions about specific teachings and how other Catholics resolve themselves to those teachings this may be a good place to ask them.

I believe that gay people should have the right to marry, it is a goverment thing (separation of church and state).
I don't care that women are not priests because I feel they have a different role in the church and it does not bother me.
I believe that a sin is a sin, everybody does it and it is not a big deal, move on. It is not between me and you, it is between me and God, your sins are between you and God. He does not need my help.

Sorry, a bit of a ramble and I am sure there are spelling mistakes.

OP here, I agree with this. I'd agree with what you said about being "culturally catholic." My family comes from those old ethnic Catholic countries where religion and nationality are very intertwined, so you pretty much lose one without the other. I'm sure I'll figure it out one day. I'm just very cautious about religion having seen people in my family go off the deep end with it to the point it's hard to converse with them and they start to sound cultish. Interesting how someone can sound so grounded until the topic of religion comes up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not facing it (we baptized) but it really doesn't sound like you should have your child baptized in the Catholic Church. Have you considered other churches, such as Episcopalian?

+1
Episcopalian here. You would be very welcome. E Church encourages questioning/examining faith, ordains women, etc.

+2. I went from Catholic to Episcopalian. I loved the rituals and ceremonies of the Catholic church, but didn't believe in much of their teachings (birth control, men only priests, saints, purgatory, etc). I have absolutely loved being Episcopalian.

[Anonymous]

I'm catholic and always will be, even if I'm not going to mass every Sunday and after a bad experience with a catholic school in VA. My faith will always be Catholic.

[Anonymous]

I don't know whether this helps or not. One is actually not baptized a Catholic--even if a Catholic priest does it--one is baptized a Christian. This is why Protestant converts to the Catholic Church are not baptized--their baptism is fully accepted as a Christian baptism. (Although I don't think a Mormon baptism would be accepted.) It is also why your child can't be baptized by a priest if it is found that someone of any faith has already baptized him or her in the bathtub.

So I think your first question is do you want your children baptized as Christians. If so, your second question is whether you want a Catholic priest to do it, clergy from another church, or indeed yourself as someone suggested.

The Catholic church is a human institution and will always have the same frailities as any other human institution, including governments and corporations. It is actually not realistic to expect a higher standard. Boccaccio wrote about this long ago in the Decameron, where an innocent visited corrupt Rome centuries ago. His conclusion: Any church that could withstand all the corruption he saw and still survive and give hope to many must have something really good going for it! Or as my grandmother used to say, "Priest are just servants of the church, and you know how hard it these days is to find good help"

OP you said: "I also assume DC will have a lot of questions about religion themselves one day and quite frankly, I can't answer them and refuse to answer them with sentences that start with "Well, Father so and so says..."

Whichever way you take, please don't eve say that! It is important to be educated in church teachings and give a straightforward and honest answer along the lines of: "The church's reason for XYZ is ABC, but I have a hard time agreeing with that because of PQR." (And if you can't articulate the Church teaching have a Catechism of the Catholic church to look it up.) It would be nice, but not necessary, to add, "Maybe someday I will understand the reasons for its position and support it; I just don't right now."

The church, properly understood, strongly supports respectful (emphasis on this word) dissent because thinking Catholics are its strongest asset. My chaplain at college was fond of saying the best Catholics are agnostic at least half the time.

[Anonymous]

Here's what my fairly non-religious mother suggested: do it just in case.

You never know, you may change your mind. Your DS may get religion later in life or want to marry a Catholic. It doesn't cost a lot of money or time to do it, so just get it out of the way. Millions of people baptize their kids even if they don't raise them particularly religiously.

[Anonymous]

You people gave me a good laugh. If you want to do what's best for your kid, don't brainwash them. And keep them away from priests.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree OP. If you don't go to church you really can't get your child baptized. You really have to be an active parishioner for that (I say this as someone who is not active and decided a baptism would be pretty hypocritical). Do churches even let your children get baptized if you are not active parishioners?

I'm not an active parishioner and my husband is not Catholic and we had no problem getting a child baptized.

[Anonymous]

Try Foundry UMC a few Sundays. So different from the Catholic church. I waited until my kids were 6 and 3 to baptize them because I struggled with this, but it is such a warm, inclusive, Christian Univeralist church. I just went to my uncle's funeral Mass, and it reminded me why I'm disgusted by the Catholic church. The priest mentioned at least 15 times how important it was to be Catholic...wtih the "or else you'll burn in a lake of fire" implied.

[Anonymous]

As a lifelong progressive Catholic, I agree with PP, though I refuse to surrender to right wing/reactionary forces in the Church who are wrong on doctrine, dogma, and canon law. OP, check out the new Pope, and the writings of Dorothy Day, Anthony de Mello, SJ, Gustavo Guiterrez, and maybe a more liberal parish like holy trinity or St. John the Baptist and then follow your conscience. It will be ok whatever you decide.

[Anonymous]

Ugh. I struggle with this too. Both of our families are very Catholic, and both really want us to baptize DS. I just have an issue w/ promising to raise my child Catholic, knowing I have no intention to do so. Until I can come to grips w/ it, we won't be baptizing. You have until a kid is 5 before you need to send them through RCIA.