Is it always bad to tell ex you miss him?

[Anonymous]

Breakups suck, OP, especially when you're the one getting dumped. But for the love of god, stop talking to him! As long as you have it in your mind that communicating with him is a possibility, you will never be able to get over him. The breakup happened for a reason (sounds like he is immature) and once the breakup happens, the relationship is damaged and you cannot go back to how things used to be.

Cut him off. ZERO communication. Do it for 6 months. Come check back in in 6 months and if you haven't had ANY communication and still feel the urge to talk to him or still miss him, I will personally mail you a check for a million dollars. Relationship/breakup forums call it "zero contact" and it really is the only way to properly get over someone.

[Anonymous]

OP. Ok. I get the message.

[Anonymous]

OP, I think you + your ex need to first take some time off to heal properly before you attempt to be friends. Right now, things are still to "fresh" and your feelings are obviously still raw, etc. Let some time pass and make sure you have emotionally moved on from him. It is very obvious from your posting that you are still not over him.

By staying in touch w/him, you are only hurting yourself right now.
It's like you are a glutton for punishment. Why do this to yourself?

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

I miss my ex, but almost exclusively when I'm randy.

Find someone else to talk to, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He broke up with me. A month ago. Not "ready for commitment".

By all means. Hang on and cling. Men like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He broke up with me. A month ago. Not "ready for commitment".

By all means. Hang on and cling. Men like that.

Thanks for the sympathetic response.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Already did it. Guess it was a mistake. Will try not to do it again.

PP here. TRY not to do it again? Oh, HELL NO! Listen to me. I am screaming at you now because I've lived and learned. YOU are better than this! He came out and said he wasn't ready for a commitment, right? There are no nuances, no underlying meanings there, no symbolism. He honestly told you he wasn't that into you.

Yes, it's heartbreaking. Yes, it's sad. You're pissed off, sad, weepy, angry and at times, miss him so much that you'd do just about anything to have him back. So, grieve this loss. Cry when you have to, alone. Let it all out. But, chin up and tell yourself that you are moving on. Moving on means forging ahead. Waking up, going to work, focusing on your job, you, other friends, other things, retail therapy, whatever gets you through and keeps you busy enough so you'll not call him or email him or text him.
I've had my heart broken more times than I care to count. I fall hard and fast...but somewhere along the way I decided that I would not give a man the satisfaction of groveling or pleading or even acting like I care after he'd broken it off. Plus, twice I had the tremendous satisfaction of having an ex boyfriend come crawling back to me, asking me to meet just more more time...and smugly saying no.

It takes time, but get back out there! Sometimes when you're the most vulnerable, you're more likely to meet the right person. I am a believer in and practioner of rebound relationships. You get sick of the drama, the heartbreak and disappointment and when you meet someone bereft of all these things, you can relax and fall in love with his normalcy!

+100 You tell it, girl!! OP,hope you're listening!

[Anonymous]

I think it is reasonable for OP to contact her ex if she wants to. She's an adult. It's possible the breakup was a mistake in hindsight. Her ex could be the only soulmate she'll ever have. Don't deny her that opportunity if it is right. OP, ignore everyone, follow your heart.