Co-worker taking advantage of flexibility but I can't do anything

[Anonymous]

I think you need to separate your justifiable managerial expectations, which stem from her abuse or the situation or pushing the envelope, from what you feel or believe is her failure to "suck it up" or have the reaction to pregnancy that you and your friends have had. The mere fact that she has not had the will power to steam through pregnancy discomfort does not make her a bad employee. You need to concentrate on what her DOCTOR says she is able to do right now, not what you believe is appropriate based on your own pregnancy or symptoms. Because frankly, that's called discrimination.

[Anonymous]

OP, I get the feeling from your post that your main concern is that her pregnancy is going to interfere with your maternity leave.

Why do women do this to each other? Even though you think you know how her pregnancy is going, you don't know what she's feeling. If she has the sick leave and is following office procedures, then let it go.

If she is only 8 weeks, it's not like this has been going on very long, which makes me think you are the drama queen and your concerns are less about her as an employee and more about how it will affect your maternity leave.

If she is violating office procedure, then you tell her that.

And you are wrong about what other offices would put up with. Private sector or government, most managers and HR departments handle pregnancy with some delicacy b/c they know there could be legal repercussions if they don't extend to a pregnant woman the same accommodations they would someone who has another medical issue, illness, or disability would be allowed to do.

If her work product is suffering, then address that -- not taking leave for illness.

[Anonymous]

That sentence was awkward ^^^ should read: They know there could be legal repercussions if they don't extend to a pregnant woman the same accommodations they would extend to someone who has an illness or medical issue or disability of another kind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you need to separate your justifiable managerial expectations, which stem from her abuse or the situation or pushing the envelope, from what you feel or believe is her failure to "suck it up" or have the reaction to pregnancy that you and your friends have had. The mere fact that she has not had the will power to steam through pregnancy discomfort does not make her a bad employee. You need to concentrate on what her DOCTOR says she is able to do right now, not what you believe is appropriate based on your own pregnancy or symptoms. Because frankly, that's called discrimination.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand what she's supposed to do if she is puking in the morning. I had bad morning sickness throughout my first trimester. I normally took the subway into work, but after having to get off at a stop and puke in the garbage can, I had to drive. Not safe to drive when you feel like any movement is going to make you throw up. Luckily, my boss was very understanding and all I had to do was send a "having a difficult morning. Will be however many minutes late".

You sound like a bitch. No other way around it. Sorry she's not as amazing as the MANY other people you know who sucked it up and just puked all day at work.

She's not actually puking. What you're referring to is what I mean that I've seen in others - who still came to work.

How the hell do you know?

Stint you have sick leave? Can she take sick leave for those times? Is she making u the hours elsewhere?

[Anonymous]

OP, I think you do need to talk to her but I think you need to drop the "well I know MANY people who just puked all day at work/on their commute" attitude, especially with her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand what she's supposed to do if she is puking in the morning. I had bad morning sickness throughout my first trimester. I normally took the subway into work, but after having to get off at a stop and puke in the garbage can, I had to drive. Not safe to drive when you feel like any movement is going to make you throw up. Luckily, my boss was very understanding and all I had to do was send a "having a difficult morning. Will be however many minutes late".

You sound like a bitch. No other way around it. Sorry she's not as amazing as the MANY other people you know who sucked it up and just puked all day at work.

You sound like a bully. If you can not meet the employment requirement, you should quit.

OP needs to talk to her, starting by setting expectations.

[Anonymous]

Even blue collar workers in this country have to show up on time, stand on their feet, do their work, while carrying babies. What is wrong with you people? Full of pities for yourself but do not give a damn about labor conditions.

[Anonymous]

If you are the manager, you need to manage. I'm guessing the office is too small to qualify for FMLA?

Also, not sure how many employees you need to have for Pregnancy Discrimination Act to come into play, but be careful in treating her more harshly than employees who have taken advantage of similar flexibility for non-pregnancy related reasons.

[Anonymous]

Time sheet fraud is a federal offense

[Anonymous]

If you want to have more flexibility, then go for it. Don't bemoan your coworker for being assertive and doing so.

[Anonymous]

I had really bad morning sickness my entire pregnancy.
Morning sickness can be really debilitating. There were some days I threw up 5 or 6 times. After you throw up so much it really causes your stomach to hurt like hell and makes you feel dizzy and weak from the lack of nourishment. I ended up hospitalized twice from it.

I threw up in restuarants, cars, on the train, all over the place. It is one of the main reasons I haven't pushed for child number 2.

Your pregnancy is no indication of how hers should or will be. Some people fly through pregnancy easy peasy, while others are bedridden the entire time.

Would you rather she come in the office and puke all over the place? Maybe she can come in pass out and now your office is disrupted by a medical emergency.

Honestly, it sounds to me like you are just being insensitive and yeah I am sensing a little jealousy. Maybe you are mad all the attention isn't on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had really bad morning sickness my entire pregnancy.
Morning sickness can be really debilitating. There were some days I threw up 5 or 6 times. After you throw up so much it really causes your stomach to hurt like hell and makes you feel dizzy and weak from the lack of nourishment. I ended up hospitalized twice from it.

I threw up in restuarants, cars, on the train, all over the place. It is one of the main reasons I haven't pushed for child number 2.

Your pregnancy is no indication of how hers should or will be. Some people fly through pregnancy easy peasy, while others are bedridden the entire time.

Would you rather she come in the office and puke all over the place? Maybe she can come in pass out and now your office is disrupted by a medical emergency.

Honestly, it sounds to me like you are just being insensitive and yeah I am sensing a little jealousy. Maybe you are mad all the attention isn't on you.

Speculate much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you want to have more flexibility, then go for it. Don't bemoan your coworker for being assertive and doing so.

Did you read the OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had really bad morning sickness my entire pregnancy.
Morning sickness can be really debilitating. There were some days I threw up 5 or 6 times. After you throw up so much it really causes your stomach to hurt like hell and makes you feel dizzy and weak from the lack of nourishment. I ended up hospitalized twice from it.

I threw up in restuarants, cars, on the train, all over the place. It is one of the main reasons I haven't pushed for child number 2.

Your pregnancy is no indication of how hers should or will be. Some people fly through pregnancy easy peasy, while others are bedridden the entire time.

Would you rather she come in the office and puke all over the place? Maybe she can come in pass out and now your office is disrupted by a medical emergency.

Honestly, it sounds to me like you are just being insensitive and yeah I am sensing a little jealousy. Maybe you are mad all the attention isn't on you.

Speculate much?

This is not even CLOSE to what OP said. Jealousy? Major reading comprehension issues on this thread. She also said the co-worker isn't puking (knows because she told her). Please, people.