How do you outsmart the secret a-hole at work?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to destroy her. Bring her down. Don't know how, but everyone has their weaknesses, and their flaws.

In short, you out-asshole the assholes.

This. Scorched earth approach; leave nothing left of her.

Personally, unless you are really good at this sort of thing, I would not waste your effort on this right now. Have the long view. First, make partner. Then, figure out if you still want to screw her.

I agree. I have no need to screw her, just want her back in my court. Prior to this, she was great to work with. I just want to find the off switch for the current behavior. If there isn't one and I do make partner, I will cross that bridge at the time. Honestly, though, I just have no interest in destroying anyone. There are better ways to spend my time. I just want to not get screwed.

[Anonymous]

I have no need to screw her, just want her back in my court.

NP. Your "B" rating was an unforgiveable shaft. This woman should never be allowed "back in your court."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to destroy her. Bring her down. Don't know how, but everyone has their weaknesses, and their flaws.

In short, you out-asshole the assholes.

This. Scorched earth approach; leave nothing left of her.

Personally, unless you are really good at this sort of thing, I would not waste your effort on this right now. Have the long view. First, make partner. Then, figure out if you still want to screw her.

I agree. I have no need to screw her, just want her back in my court. Prior to this, she was great to work with. I just want to find the off switch for the current behavior. If there isn't one and I do make partner, I will cross that bridge at the time. Honestly, though, I just have no interest in destroying anyone. There are better ways to spend my time. I just want to not get screwed.

That's incredibly naive of you. She'll screw you again. Maybe tomorrow; maybe in two years. But it will come again.

Com on, you know the saying. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice....but substitute screw, I guess.

[Anonymous]

Queen Bee syndrome. I had the same snarky female boss in my high finance job. Her main priority is to protect herself in the eyes of the company and C-level execs. Unfortunately they don't see her lies or hidden agenda. And the good people leave.

You could try this: Be very positive always, compliment her, tell her you look forward to working her forever. This last bit is very important. The more you say and act like you want to be working there forever, long term this, help out this, dividends here in the future talk, she will be defeated in her lame attempts to bully you out. Just do it! It throws a good loop in. Certainly keep your eyes on an exit plan, but make echoed at the office believe you are there for the long haul.
Hell, even sit down with her and come up with a 5 year plan for you and the company. Finally, have fun with it! Some women bosses are the worst managers, leaders, communicators, mentors I have ever seen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:See if you can find out from colleagues what her issue is. Agree with pp, I don't know what it is you did with Bob re: his assignment that she is concerned about and since you didn't overstep your bounds, you've got nothing to apologize for.

The only insight I have into the Bob situation is that he told her that he was being staffed on X project at my direction and against his will. There are a number of untruths in there (i.e., he hadn't been staffed, just asked; it wasn't my idea, I had just allowed it to move forward and be had repeatedly told me and the partner initiating the staffing that he did want to do it). I think my group leader ultimately set the record straight but not until well after the fact. Honestly, Bob is digging himself a huge hole by refusing billable hours he sorely needs. In any event, either Bob plausibly spun this as evil Susie sending him off to Siberia or it was simply that I stepped on her toes. The former makes more sense both in terms of her reaction and what I know of Bob.

Well, you obviously shouldn't stick your neck out for Bob again! He sounds like a little a-hole to me. Do the bare minimum where he is concerned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to destroy her. Bring her down. Don't know how, but everyone has their weaknesses, and their flaws.

In short, you out-asshole the assholes.

This. Scorched earth approach; leave nothing left of her.

Personally, unless you are really good at this sort of thing, I would not waste your effort on this right now. Have the long view. First, make partner. Then, figure out if you still want to screw her.

I agree. I have no need to screw her, just want her back in my court. Prior to this, she was great to work with. I just want to find the off switch for the current behavior. If there isn't one and I do make partner, I will cross that bridge at the time. Honestly, though, I just have no interest in destroying anyone. There are better ways to spend my time. I just want to not get screwed.

Once they have tasted blood, they will always come in for the kill.

There is no better way to spend your time than taking this individual right down to Chinatown. It is that or eat the bitter egg of a poisonous goose.

[Anonymous]

Do you have a portable book? Honestly, sounds like you aren't making partner. I just don't get why this is out of the blue from years of working together? Does this woman seriously support other women - especially other women making partner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She sounds massively insecure. You may have to lay low until she fixates on someone else, which is inevitable. However, she may come around to you again. I've worked in places where the immediate supervisor (or even peer who tried to position herself that way) would hold grudges against certain people. If you play it cool, she may turn her wrath/cold shoulder to Bob himself, but may turn it back to you again.
If she lateraled in, is there a way that you could lateral across to another position in the firm? Or is this your only track to partner there?

Agree. She has issues, stay away.