Are we too wealthy for financial aid for 3 kids?

[Anonymous]

You must be joking. Explain again why I should pay for you to be able to stay home because you view that as being better for your kids? You don't have financial need, you have financial want, and I'm surprised you want me and others to foot the bill. Sure, your salary may go to tuition and child related expenses, but that's your choice, and a lot of people make that choice. If you want everyone else to pay for your kids to go to school, send them to public school, we're all paying for that as well (I wish we were all paying more for that, but not to help a SAHM to sustain $1 million in equity in her home). If you are not happy with your salary prospects, meet with a career counselor or do some research to figure out a way to transition into a job or profession that pays more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My problem is that I want it all: I want to live in DC, stay at home with my kids, and send them to good private schools, all on my husband's fairly decent (but not by DC standards) salary. A pipe dream, huh?

I think the answer is, "yes." But fortunately the options are not terrible.

As for financial aid, it's not cranked out on a press in the school's basement. It comes from families at the school, including families in which both parents work so that they don't need to ask for aid, although they'd like to have one parent stay home; families that have chosen to have two children, although they would like to have more; families that have moved to the suburbs to cut down on housing costs; and families that are not sitting on $1 million in home equity that they refuse to touch. All of these families who have accepted painful tradeoffs may quite reasonably resent seeing their donations used to help a similar family avoid them.

[Anonymous]

And having three kids is something of a luxury too. We'd love to have three or more kids, but don't because we can't afford it.

[Anonymous]

Seriously, I hope a PP's comment that the OP would get some financial aid is not true. I would rescind my pledge to my school now if that was the case. Like others have said, I'd like to be home with my kids too. I don't get paid enough to hire a FT time nanny or even a PT sitter. So please get over yourself. Get a job, send your kids to public, or dip into your equity. I have about $100k of equity in my house. I am not paying for any part of your ride!

[Anonymous]

I thought that was directed at the poster who asked if two working parents with a combined income of $150K would get aid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seriously, I hope a PP's comment that the OP would get some financial aid is not true. I would rescind my pledge to my school now if that was the case. Like others have said, I'd like to be home with my kids too. I don't get paid enough to hire a FT time nanny or even a PT sitter. So please get over yourself. Get a job, send your kids to public, or dip into your equity. I have about $100k of equity in my house. I am not paying for any part of your ride!

I know, I have three kids in private school and I work full time with no help at home. My eldest child picks up the younger two and they travel home from school together. They let themselves in, check in with me, have a snack and do homework until I return. I prepare dinner, help with whatever homework is left, clean up, and do whatever else needs to be done, maybe even write a check to the school's annual fund. A busy life that requires some responsibility from all of us. It is our choice and we are fortunate to have those choices. The OP is incredibly fortunate to have her house paid off, and a great family salary. If she wants private school, she should either use the equity in her house or go back to work.

[Anonymous]

If I thought a PENNY of my donations to my kids' school was going to subsidize lazy entitled princesses like the OP, I'd throw a FIT. Grow up. You can't have it all unless you go out and earn it. Why the hell should those of us who work hard subsidize your lazy ass? If you want to stay home and play tennis while your kids are in school, send them to public school. If you want to send them to private school, get off your butt and find a job that can pay the tuition. I don't think I've ever come across such an attitude of entitlement on this board before. Good God.

[Anonymous]

I have 3 kids in private school. I have some flexibility from work (longtime employer) but work full time. I hire a babysitter from AU afterschool which costs around $12500 per year. plus summers. Summers are very expensive! $300x3x10 weeks (simple camp) = $9000! Plus sports, music , etc. So add another $25K to your tuition to understand the expenses that need to be covered if both parents are working and you have 3 school aged kids.

[Anonymous]

Hi OP: I don't fault you for wanting it all! We all do! You are in a very enviable position, with a paid off house, 3 children who I"m sure are the love of your life, and you've been able to stay home with them it sounds like for a good while. If I were you, I wouldn't move. I'd retake a good, hard, look at the DC public school system and see if there are options that could work for you. You may be able to enjoy another 7-10 years in the city if you do this. I'm assuming you may have to leave for 9th grade, but if you have young children, I think it is doable.

Have you looked at neighborhood elementary schools? Have you really looked at charter schools? (There are upper income, smart, kids from stable middle class families and upper income families at both charters and public elementary schools in this city.) Aka, there are pockets of greatness in the otherwise dismal system. It does take research, first hand visits, and finding the right "fit", but thousands of families do it!

I agree that the worse option is to try to apply for financial aid at private schools where other parents who have made very hard decisions to have two spouses work in order to pay for a burdensome tuition would have to subsidize your choice.

Good luck, and I hope you stay in DC. Its such a great place to raise kids!

[Anonymous]

There's got to be something more going on with OP's $1 million house. What is it, OP? Was it given to you by a parent with the agreement that you wouldn't tap the equity? Even for schooling?? I know of a situation like that. That house is the major reason you're being raked over the coals. What's the full story?

[Anonymous]

why mention the million dollar home, if it couldn't be tapped?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I thought a PENNY of my donations to my kids' school was going to subsidize lazy entitled princesses like the OP, I'd throw a FIT. Grow up. You can't have it all unless you go out and earn it. Why the hell should those of us who work hard subsidize your lazy ass? If you want to stay home and play tennis while your kids are in school, send them to public school. If you want to send them to private school, get off your butt and find a job that can pay the tuition. I don't think I've ever come across such an attitude of entitlement on this board before. Good God.

Thank you.

[Anonymous]

GDS will not even consider you for financial aid if one parent is at home - it is an untapped into resourse. If the parent can afford to stay at home (bypass at least $50/K a year) they are wealthy enough to pay tuition. that said, you may get a little aid given you have three kids, though it probably will not happen until the 3rd is enrolled.

At least get a PT job while the kids are in school

[Anonymous]

Schools also consider the equity that you have in your home when looking into financial aid allocations, as well as your debt (mortgage, student loans - probably not credite cards)... you fill out the same FAFSA you did for college

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You must be joking.

I'm beginning to think she was.