How to explain others not sharing to a 3 yo?
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Anonymous
| You can also reinforce how he felt when others didn't share. did he like it? No. So when there are times that he doesn't share others might be feeling that way too. |
Anonymous
| I tell my children that it's ok to say "no" as long as they are polite about it. They are 5, so they encounter a lot of, "You're not my friend if..." They were taught to respond by saying, "I'm still your friend, but right now, I want to (fill in blank) by myself." I've also never allowed toys at the park. When their friends don't want to share their things, I say, "It's ok for your friends to say "no". Sometimes you like to play alone too. "Jimmy" will let you know when he's ready." |
Anonymous
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My son is 3.5 and my expectation is that if he decides to bring a toy to the park, he's going to share it, unless the other kid is being rough/inappropriate with the item, or trying to walk off with the item and not play it with DS jointly. But honestly, it has never been an issue. He has not refused to share since he was about 2. He really has no problem sharing as long as the other kid wants to play with him as well.
If someone else refused to share with him, my response would be, "yeah, I don't really agree with that, but it is up to him and his family. Just because someone does something doesn't mean we should." |
Anonymous
I don't bring the majority of my stuff out of my house, so it would not be an issue. But if you'd like to share my crappy old purse or make a call on my five year old cell phone, go for it! |
Anonymous
Why would you make your little kid do something that even you don't do?? Makes zero sense. |
Anonymous
It might be your watch I'd like to share. Point being, should someone force you to share it with me? |
Anonymous
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If we host a playdate at our house, toys must be shared. If a toy is brought to the playground, it is nice to share but not required. There are other things to play with at the playground.
My daughter is 3.5 and I usually just try to redirect her interest in something else if someone isn't sharing something she wants. And I just reiterate that sharing is nice and try to avoid the 'why Susie isn't sharing' bit. "Well, it would have been nice of Susie to share with you but we had fun on the swings instead didn't we?" |
Anonymous
| My 2 year old figured out that while kids often say no to sharing, moms almost always say yes, so he just asks the moms if he can play with the kids' toys. |
Anonymous
Sorry, don't wear one. |
Anonymous
| Our 4-year-old knows to leave something at home or in the car if she doesn't want to share it. It makes sense to het. |
Anonymous
| I force my kid to share no matter what, but here the problem is that the kid brought a toy from home to the playground, which is definitely a recipe for disaster if the kid doesn't want to share. I'd tell my kid the truth "Not everyone is good at sharing. But it's what we do in our family." |
Anonymous
Um, unlike my child, no one can force me to go to bed before 2 am, or not to hit my brother (one the few occasions a year that I see him). If someone asks to use my cellphone in a pinch when theirs is dead, I can be obnoxious and refuse to "share", but I shouldn't. |
Anonymous
But it does depend on the situation, no? Bringing a toy you won't share to a play group is different than bringing a toy you won't share to the playground. If I were invited to a friends house for a party and brought a bottle of wine it would be rude not to offer to share it. If I'm having a picnic at the park then it would be unusual to share my wine with strangers, although it might be nice to offer depending on the circumstances. So adults are expected to share, it just depends on the circumstances. That said I also think kids benefit from hearing the word "no." so if my kid wanted to play with a toy another kid brought and that kid was adamant about not sharing I'd just say to my kid, "it's James toy and he's playing with it, find something else to do." then I would just deflect conversation about "sharing"...kid says, "but he's not sharing!" I say, "do you need help finding something to do?" so basically redirection. I honestly do think it's rude for a kid to bring a toy to a play group they can't/won't share. Why would the parent do that? Isn't the point of a play group for kids to learn how to play together? |
Anonymous
| "Sweetheart, some people are douchebags". |
Anonymous
Are purposefully behaving like a juvenile? |