To women - would you be open to an affair?

Anonymous
I have actually had opportunities, but without going into detail, I would say no. It is surprising to know how many opportunities exist, because some men really don't care, it seems.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Affairs are despicable and sinful. I wouldn't get married only to trample upon the sanctity of said bond by fucking another person for whatever reason. If you can't honestly work shit out with your partner, then get a clean cut divorce.

Marriage these days is honestly a joke because of people who think it's okay to step out on their partner; because of the people who just get married out of convenience or in a drunken stupor; because of the people who fucked up and got pregnant before marriage and decided to get married for the sake of the children only to find out that they really don't love each other and hence think they can justify their profane behavior of affairs because it "Wasn't their fault" or what have you; ultimately because people often get married out of lust and not love, and the one's who may truly be compatible and in love with each other simply don't have the resolve to be selfless in their marriage and work out their respective issues.

Nuff said.


Amen, sister!
Anonymous
No, no and no. In my younger years I experienced all 3 sides of the infidelity triangle: I was cheated on, I was cheated with (I.e. I was the OW), and I cheated. I came to realize that all 3 roles were toxic and that no matter how sexy/exciting/absorbing those situations were, in the end I have to treat my body and my relationships in a much more sacred fashion.

I seriously believe this is the main reason my dating life up to my marriage got so much better and I am now married to an awesome man who's also an awesome father.
Anonymous
Yes. I'm hot too! Minus the mommy tummy, but there's a six pack hiding under the stretched out skin.
Anonymous
No. Outside of the sin/disrespect angle, it's the best way to make a bad situation even worse. Like, if you've got $100,000 in credit card debt, is it a good idea to go get out another credit card? If you can't manage one relationship, it's damn stupid to start another.
Anonymous
There are sadists who get all tingly and turned on by beating people against their will. People who have affairs aren't all that different.
Anonymous
No, no and no. In my younger years I experienced all 3 sides of the infidelity triangle: I was cheated on, I was cheated with (I.e. I was the OW), and I cheated. I came to realize that all 3 roles were toxic and that no matter how sexy/exciting/absorbing those situations were, in the end I have to treat my body and my relationships in a much more sacred fashion.

I seriously believe this is the main reason my dating life up to my marriage got so much better and I am now married to an awesome man who's also an awesome father.


I could have written the above. Spent some years feeling ashamed of my behavior, trying to figure out why I would debase myself/hurt others. worked through that crap before I met DH and am grateful to have the perspective and I am very, very careful to keep our marriage healthy and strong. I know that the sexual thrill, or emotional need, or fix, or whatever sucks you in, masks insecurity, pain, fear, angst, immaturity and there is always a better way to address those issues. I also know that everyone is susceptible to an affair and both partners in a marriage need to be mindful of creating secure boundaries and fostering a loving connection. This cannot prevent all affairs, but it is a start.
Anonymous
So for those women who are open to an affair, how do I broach the subject?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Serious question.


Depends. When I was married, no. Now that I am divorced, it would depend on the person propositioning me and his circumstances. I am not interested in breaking up a family. I would be interested in more regular sex. If a nice married guy had a confirmed hall pass from his wife, I would consider that.

Anonymous
But PP, is a Hall Pass really an affair? I consider an affair something unknown to one (or both) partner's significant other, and not ok with them if they found out. Does a Hall pass count?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:But PP, is a Hall Pass really an affair? I consider an affair something unknown to one (or both) partner's significant other, and not ok with them if they found out. Does a Hall pass count?


I agree, I don't think a hall pass counts. To me, having an affair is dishonest and that is the big problem. So, as far as going behind my husband's back, no, I would never do that as I wouldn't want him to as well.
Anonymous
if the guy was rich...hell yes!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Affairs are despicable and sinful. I wouldn't get married only to trample upon the sanctity of said bond by fucking another person for whatever reason. If you can't honestly work shit out with your partner, then get a clean cut divorce.

Marriage these days is honestly a joke because of people who think it's okay to step out on their partner; because of the people who just get married out of convenience or in a drunken stupor; because of the people who fucked up and got pregnant before marriage and decided to get married for the sake of the children only to find out that they really don't love each other and hence think they can justify their profane behavior of affairs because it "Wasn't their fault" or what have you; ultimately because people often get married out of lust and not love, and the one's who may truly be compatible and in love with each other simply don't have the resolve to be selfless in their marriage and work out their respective issues.

Nuff said.


Amen, sister!


Me too. Plus, if I ever had an affair and it was found out by my husband, the hurt he would feel would not be worth any pleasure I got from it.
Anonymous
No, but I would consider swinging (it's a no-go with DH).
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:So for those women who are open to an affair, how do I broach the subject?


Ask me to lunch. Flirt with me. Act like you would on a date. Pick up the check.
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