Not only is it inappropriate that he let your 2 yo drink alcohol, but it's out of line that he gave YOU alcohol without your knowledge. What was his motive there? I can't help but think that if this were a college boyfriend, we'd all be shouting date rape. And rightly so, because sneaking alcohol into someone's drink without their knowledge is not okay. |
This is all weird, but if it's real I'll say this: (1) I'd be furious that he said nothing and let the toddler drink it, (2) I'd be furious that he said nothing while I drank it, since I was fine with beer or wine while nursing but I'm sure that's not what he was slipping into the shake, especially since you didn't taste it, and (3) your husband is an alcoholic and needs help. |
Of course that's not okay!
A sip of wine to taste it? Sure. 3/4 of a glass that has alcohol in it? Absolutely not! |
Booze in the morning? |
This makes no sense. If he were drinking and trying to hide it from you, why give you some voluntarily? Who puts booze in smoothies? You both sound nuts.
And no, it isn't at all ok to let a baby (what a 20-mo-old really is) drink alcohol. But there's something weirder going on here. |
OP, so what's it like to be married to a 15 year old and have babies with him? |
OMG I hope this isnt real. Mom of 3 here with two under the age of 3 still....I would be very rageful if someone spike my morning drink when the only thing that saves me is caffeine and I am having to limit that too while nursing. That is the LAST thing I need is to booze up in the morning and it is a violation of trust to spike my drink with something without telling me. Even IF my husband spiked the morning shake for fun ( read: mimosas on a Sunday but in a shake) and somehow forgot to mention it because we were juggling kids and enjoying holiday morning off with family ( unlikely) I would expect him to fess up IMMEDIATELY if he saw the toddler sharing. He would do so right away, sheepishly, with apologies, and with a phone call made by HIM to the ped.
I dont really care that he is having punch in the morning if he is on holiday and you guys do this from time to time ( my own family does mimosas, bloody marys, Irish Coffee etc on occasion)- I just think it is realllly irresponsible for him to not speak up and let you know once you are sharing with a 20 month old. It would make me reassess him in a way wondering how sneaky he is on other things too. |
OP again....I'm not sure why I sound nuts as two PPs have stated. I didn't know he put alcohol in the drink. I asked what the ingredients were. I was told only fruit.
I guess since DH is "working from home" this week, he thought he'd indulge a bit? |
You probably know this, but alcohol can be fatal for toddlers. They can't digust it as an adult would. I would freak out.
In other thoughts, why is DH slipping you booze OP? |
So what are you going to do OP? Your husband gave you a drink and lied by omission about the alcohol in it. He continued the lie when he watched you give the drink to your toddler. And now you're asking an anonymous board if you should be upset. Wow.
For the record, this is one of those "We need to have a serious talk with a professional in order to continue in this marriage" situations. |
I am not here to defend OP's husband but I will say that my husband and many other husbands I know have not done as much reading as their counterparts when it comes to this kind of thing so to some, the alcohol having the capacity to kill a toddler might be news. Alcohol would seem to be a no brainer and I am certain my husband DOES know this... but he didnt seem to know about shellfish, when to introduce dairies, etc....he depended on me to tell him - somewhat lame but true. I didnt care because he handles other things and I am fine being the one who reads up. I can see some fathers thinking it would be an allergic reaction at most just because they are ignorant and choose to let the spouse read up on all things concerning baby's development etc. Having said this, I still say he is ridiculously irresponsible. Just not risking killing his child exactly. Or at least not on purpose. |
Booze in the morning is a Big Red Flag. |
This can't be real and it would actually be a sort of funny troll post if it wasn't so disturbing .... Just in case it is real though, you need to get your DH into counseling or something right away. Something is seriously wrong here (slipping alcohol to a nursing mother in the AM w/o her knowing? Allowing a toddler to drink an alcoholic beverage? OP - do you hear how insane that sounds?). Makes me wonder what other crazy things he is doing without you knowing ... |
PP here and for the record, my dad used to let my little sister take a sip or two of his beer (30 years ago, in a different country) when she was a toddler. I thought that is what you were going to say too when I opened this post, and was going to try and calm you down. But given the story you told, you are not nearly worked up enough ... |
Your nonchalance about the whole thing makes me feel like this is a fake post. I'd be livid, worried, etc not casually posting here. |