Manners...ever feel like your are out of date?

[Anonymous]

I am 39 and I agree with all you have written. I must cop to, however, saying, "No problem," almost ubiquitiously and, while at my desk at work, sitting with my legs tucked underneath me. Everything else, though, I agree with, esp. texting etiquette and the phrase, "That sucks." I remember, being about 12 or so, saying, "That sucks," around my mother (I did not even know what it meant; I just thought it was a random phrasing of, "That stinks") and my mom FLIPPING out on me, saying that we do NOT use those words, and that was a TERRIBLE TERRIBLE thing to say, and that she was raising young ladies, not truck drivers. So, to this day, I do not use this phrase at all.

[Anonymous]

My 20 something friends honestly don't understand why I have an issue with texting/web surfing in the middle of conversation. They do it almost without thinking -- like hair twisting. And they really resist logging off. It's compulsive.

[Anonymous]

19:28 again -- Also an older British friend laid into me for the "no problem" thing. She said the phrase offended her, because it felt like I was denying her gratitude. As if whatever I did to merit the "thank you" meant nothing to me, even thought it meant something to her.

I get her point. But it's a hard habit to break.

[Anonymous]

Its regional, OP. If you visit other parts of the country, metropolitan areas, there would be more manners. i.e.: no door slamming in the next guys face, pleases and thank yous properly applied, etc. You are being polite in calling them different. Raised in a barn and proud of it is more accurate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 39 and I agree with all you have written. I must cop to, however, saying, "No problem," almost ubiquitiously and, while at my desk at work, sitting with my legs tucked underneath me. Everything else, though, I agree with, esp. texting etiquette and the phrase, "That sucks." I remember, being about 12 or so, saying, "That sucks," around my mother (I did not even know what it meant; I just thought it was a random phrasing of, "That stinks") and my mom FLIPPING out on me, saying that we do NOT use those words, and that was a TERRIBLE TERRIBLE thing to say, and that she was raising young ladies, not truck drivers. So, to this day, I do not use this phrase at all.

I had the exact same experience with my mom when I said "That sucks" at the age of 12 or so! I too don't use the phrase as an adult either.

[Anonymous]

If any of you remember Bob Levey and his columns in the POST before he retired, he used to have a huge "thing" about "No problem." I honestly had never thought about it before I read this in his columns. Honestly, I do think it's a generational thing and while we/some may have a problem with "No problem," perhaps we/some should just remind ourselves that it really is just a way of saying, "You are welcome," or, "My pleasure." It is (I believe) said with the same intent.

[Anonymous]

36 and agree with pretty much everything ...

I do say "no problem" but will think about it now.

I would never put my feet up on any kind of furniture outside of my own home or that of family or close friends.

Bra straps ... it's UNDERwear!!

Texting ... appropriate in the company of others only in an emergency and with an apology/explanation (not throughout).

Whenever I hear a kid say something "sucks" I tell them to go ask their parents where the phrase comes from and if they're comfortable coming back and telling me the origin of the phrase then they can use it in front of me. Although I wonder if soon their parents won't even know? I had a similar experience with my mom!

My husband insists upon wearing a hat all the time and it makes me insane. I try to fight the good fight when we go to dinner, but some days I just don't have it in me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Whenever I hear a kid say something "sucks" I tell them to go ask their parents where the phrase comes from and if they're comfortable coming back and telling me the origin of the phrase then they can use it in front of me. Although I wonder if soon their parents won't even know? I had a similar experience with my mom!

I'm another poster who's mom banned the phrase "it sucks" because, she said, it had certain meaning, but she wouldn't explain what that certain meaning was. It took a while for me to figure it out, which basically engraved it in my mind.

[Anonymous]

^^^^ whose mom. Geez, I can't write, either!

[Anonymous]

I'm 50 and was brought up in a family where manners were of great importance (my maternal grandfather was in the foreign service), but I don't have a problem with "no problem". I understand that it can be taken to implly that if it were a problem, the speaker wouldn't have bothered, but, I prefer to interpret it as a variant of the classic WASPY "not at all" -- a more casual alternative to "you're welcome".

As for "sucks", as the mom of 2 sons in college, I must admit that I use it all the time -- the things one learns from one's children! Nonetheless, I'm appalled at myself when I do!

Texting during a conversation -- horrible . . . but I know many people in their 50s and 60s (including my sister -- horrors) who do the same thing.

So what does really bother me? (Obviously, not beginning a sentence with "so".) Addressing a stranger on the street to ask for directions or the time without first saying, "Excuse me". If I hadn't been brought up to be more polite, I would respond, "What am I? The Answer Lady?" Instead, I answer the question, smile and say, "Have a good afternoon" -- never "have a good one".

[Anonymous]

When I am at the ATM, reading the prompts, and the last one is "I'm done!" We were taught that people are finished, roast is done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a minor one, but wearing pantyhose seems out of date. I see younger women bare-legged even in cool weather. As alternatives, it seems most go with high boots, tights, or just pants instead of dresses or skirts.

I'm 47 and have pantyhose on today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've noticed that younger people will sometimes start a sentence with "so", as in "So, I went to the store and bought bread and milk, and I ran into X ..."

It's like we were talking about this already and they're just picking up where we left off. Not a huge deal, but I find it strange to my baby-boomer ears.

My 13 year old does this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a minor one, but wearing pantyhose seems out of date. I see younger women bare-legged even in cool weather. As alternatives, it seems most go with high boots, tights, or just pants instead of dresses or skirts.

I'm 47 and have pantyhose on today.

In your defense, PP, it's pretty chilly today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a minor one, but wearing pantyhose seems out of date. I see younger women bare-legged even in cool weather. As alternatives, it seems most go with high boots, tights, or just pants instead of dresses or skirts.

I'm 47 and have pantyhose on today.

In your defense, PP, it's pretty chilly today.

I am 39 and I am wearing bare legs with heels and a pencil skirt today.