What about people who stay way too long for a playdate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:None of this makes sense to me. Just say 'don't mean to kick you out, but Jr. has to go down!' etc. Do you people have no experience interacting with others?

LOL We did put our child down for a nap. I thought that was hint to leave. I couldn't believe they were still at our house!!!

[Anonymous]

She's probably very lonely.

[Anonymous]

Just say you have someplace you have to be in a bit, and that you're going to need to wrap the playdate up. Not hard.

[Anonymous]

flick the lights on and off...

op, she's probably bored and/or feeling isolated. or she may have had no sense of how much time had elapsed due to personality and/or sleep deprivation.

i would just set the time and/or politely tell her you have an errand to run if she doesn't take the hint

[Anonymous]

ok, so what is the standard? I figured 1.5 to 2 hours but would see 2 hrs as still perfectly fine (but at the 2 hr mark you start to pack up). yes? or too long?

weird that an acquaintance would stay that long. If it's a genuine friend, then i'm always the one trying to talk them into staying and putting their kids down at my house so we can hang out more (but that's a "play date" done more for the mommies who happen to have kids near in age - not a kid-scheduled play date).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are those people sticking around American or from other countries?

I have American firneds who did this. First ones to arrive at the party and last to leave. Could not take a hint.

Why are you hinting instead of just being direct?

Serious question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:ok, so what is the standard? I figured 1.5 to 2 hours but would see 2 hrs as still perfectly fine (but at the 2 hr mark you start to pack up). yes? or too long?

weird that an acquaintance would stay that long. If it's a genuine friend, then i'm always the one trying to talk them into staying and putting their kids down at my house so we can hang out more (but that's a "play date" done more for the mommies who happen to have kids near in age - not a kid-scheduled play date).

I think the same way as this poster and am wondering if maybe the friend who overstayed her welcome just thinks that the two of you are better friends than you really are. I also agree with the PPs who said that the host should make it clear from the get-go what the expectations are. Makes it so much easier for everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL I'd have straight up lied after awhile. "Well this has been great, but we have plans at 3, so we'll have to cut things a bit short!" [/quote

Why would that be a lie. You could have plans for 3 -- I plan to take a nap. I plan to sit on the couch and say "Thank God they're gone". Surely you can plan something!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:flick the lights on and off...

op, she's probably bored and/or feeling isolated. or she may have had no sense of how much time had elapsed due to personality and/or sleep deprivation.

i would just set the time and/or politely tell her you have an errand to run if she doesn't take the hint

lmao!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are those people sticking around American or from other countries?

I have American firneds who did this. First ones to arrive at the party and last to leave. Could not take a hint.

Why are you hinting instead of just being direct?

Serious question.

It wasn't my question but I do know moms who are recent immigrants to the U.S. - husbands are working and they don't have work visas yet and are lonely/overwhelmed in a new country; they often make plans where one mom will go to another's home with her baby and they'll spend the day together - just to get out of the house and have someone to talk to who speaks the language. That's totally different than this situation though, as I think the plans are made for the whole day in advance.

[Anonymous]

You really share the blame in this. If you are not being specific then you certainly share the responsibility for the extended stay. I know this may come as a shock but playdates are a fairly new concept. Most new parents were not raised with playdates. You went outside or played with your cousins or next door neighbor without some big playdate label. If you are receiving an invitation without a timeframe then it might be seem rude to say I'm outta here at 4.

[Anonymous]

I disagree, PP. etiquette is universal. You do not stay more than an hour to an hour and a half for a play date. M

[Anonymous]

Moms have errands to run, need to cook, etc... Who the hell hangs out for an entire day at someone else's house?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I disagree, PP. etiquette is universal. You do not stay more than an hour to an hour and a half for a play date. M

BS. A person who says this has never stepped outside their neighborhood.

In my country burping in public is considered gross and embarrassing. Here you can get away with it saying excuse me.

In my country it's common to greet people kissing them on the cheeks even when you introduce yourself. Here? Not really.

Anyway, this is one of the things I miss from my country. The freedom to come to a friend's house unannounced and stick around all day if we don't have plans. We always have some extras in the pantry or fridge in case someone stops by to spend the day. I remember growing up our home was always full of laughter, people coming and going. We always had someone to play with. We could go to our friend's house without calling or setting up anything formal. Our moms would come home from work and sit outside and talk while we played on the driveway. There was never a settled routine and still we always managed to do homework, eat a fresh warm meal and have quality time together.

Here you guys want to control every single second of your day in such a crazy manner, you're always in a rush and complaining on how you don't have time for this, for that or wishing you could do things differently. No doubt why every other woman I know is in some sort of anxiety medication, anti-depressives or whatever meds to help them cope with life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Moms have errands to run, need to cook, etc... Who the hell hangs out for an entire day at someone else's house?

You can't cook while talking to someone?