Maternity leave in the US - what do you think is reasonable?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think the government or the employer should be responsible for providing ANY paid leave, honestly. People choose to have children, that should not have any effect on their employer and their need to run their business.

IMO allowing the parent to use whatever sick leave/vacation time is reasonable. Anything else (even unpaid) is beyond generous.

right - people choose to have children. however, since vast majority of people makes the same decision (namely, to have children) then everyone benefits from the policy at some point. the only people this hurts are people who choose not to have children, and this is just as well. having children is a contribution to the future of the society as well, so i don't mind if childless (a small number anyway) get a small penalty there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think the government or the employer should be responsible for providing ANY paid leave, honestly. People choose to have children, that should not have any effect on their employer and their need to run their business.

IMO allowing the parent to use whatever sick leave/vacation time is reasonable. Anything else (even unpaid) is beyond generous.

right - people choose to have children. however, since vast majority of people makes the same decision (namely, to have children) then everyone benefits from the policy at some point. the only people this hurts are people who choose not to have children, and this is just as well. having children is a contribution to the future of the society as well, so i don't mind if childless (a small number anyway) get a small penalty there.

Let me guess, you have children so you "don't mind" ? 42% of Gen X women are childless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think the government or the employer should be responsible for providing ANY paid leave, honestly. People choose to have children, that should not have any effect on their employer and their need to run their business.

IMO allowing the parent to use whatever sick leave/vacation time is reasonable. Anything else (even unpaid) is beyond generous.

Do you have kids? I get 2 wks vacation and 1 wk sick. I should leave my baby at 3 wks old?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If we could completely change the FMLA system in the U.S. what do you think is reasonable?

Personally, I think 12 weeks leave is on the short side of reasonable. My infant was sleeping longer stretches at 8 weeks and I was beginning to feel cabin-feverish.

I think we should have 16 weeks of paid leave. I think that is more than reasonable. If you don't use all 16 weeks at once, you can keep the leave for sick days.

I was blessed with a terrible sleeper. By 9 months we were at our wits end. I would have killed for more flexible hours or just 1 day off a week to catch up on sleep/errands, etc. Thus, I also think that in general there should be at least 2 weeks of sick leave on top of 2 weeks of vacation leave. Since having kids, I have ended up maxing out sick leave pretty much every year which takes away from much-needed vacation time.

In other words, I think if leave was more generous all around, it would relieve a lot of burden on new parents.

OP, when are you going to grow up and realize that your employer is not your parents, or your husband, or anyone else who has an obligation or even a need to make your life perfect? Quit your whining and be thankful that you have a job. No one cares about your terrible sleeper. They care about the job tha you are able to do for the company. If you can't hack it, you can't hack it. You should have thought about that before having kids.

Libertarian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think unpaid FMLA is fine. The longer you wait to put your baby in daycare, the harder it will be. If you want to stay a home, be a stay at home mom, but this long-ass, paid for leave will just never be politically viable in this country, period. And guess what, the European countries are finding that they cannot afford it either.

Care to substantiate?

I don't believe it's true. European countries have been providing ML for many decades, their birth rates are still declining, and many European women do not take their full ML.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think unpaid FMLA is fine. The longer you wait to put your baby in daycare, the harder it will be. If you want to stay a home, be a stay at home mom, but this long-ass, paid for leave will just never be politically viable in this country, period. And guess what, the European countries are finding that they cannot afford it either.

Care to substantiate?

I don't believe it's true. European countries have been providing ML for many decades, their birth rates are still declining, and many European women do not take their full ML.

Not the PP, but it is true. Europe for the most part is being crushed under the weight of these entitlements and companies too are starting to complain about parents - not just mothers - who take their generous leave while the job is held for them, then they come back then OOPS we're pregnant again, kindly hold my job for another year or whatever, then I'll come back and WHOOPS we wanted to have another so I'm off again. The info is a Google away...

[Anonymous]

I am a small business owner who, more and more, is staffing my business with 1099 temporary contract workers, precisely to get around regulations such as this one.

Anyone who thinks that it is reasonable to ask businesses to provide you with 16+ weeks of paid leave, simply because you decide to pop out a kid is either 1) on welfare themselves; 2) still living at home with mommy and daddy, or has access to their trust fund, or 3) works for the government.

News Flash, OP. You are not irreplaceable in the work force. I guarantee that if you quit tomorrow, your employer would have people lined up at the door within a week to take your job. Why in the world do you think someone else should pay to have dust cover your desk for 16 weeks, so that you can have your cake and eat it too? Your sense of entitlement is shocking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think the government or the employer should be responsible for providing ANY paid leave, honestly. People choose to have children, that should not have any effect on their employer and their need to run their business.

IMO allowing the parent to use whatever sick leave/vacation time is reasonable. Anything else (even unpaid) is beyond generous.

Do you have kids? I get 2 wks vacation and 1 wk sick. I should leave my baby at 3 wks old?

I have 4 kids.

Whether you leave your baby at 3 weeks is a decision you need to make for yourself. If you have 3 weeks, and your partner has 3 weeks, you could theoretically wait until the baby is 6 weeks before putting her in daycare. Or you could save enough money to last you to take whatever time off YOU feel is reasonable. Why should your employer be on the hook?

[Anonymous]

I have kids and got zero paid maternity leave. And, yes, it's a pain, but honestly, like a PP said, I'm just happy that I had a job to come back to.

I'm a definite Democrat, but I don't really think it's fair to make employers responsible for paid maternity leave. If you choose to have kids, it's just something you have to figure out. Parents have to figure out all sorts of things when they have children.

Why is it fair that an employer has to hold your job AND pay you for it, while you're at home taking care of a baby? And, that would mean that either another worker would have to pick up the slack or the employer would have to hire someone else and pay double salaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a small business owner who, more and more, is staffing my business with 1099 temporary contract workers, precisely to get around regulations such as this one.

Anyone who thinks that it is reasonable to ask businesses to provide you with 16+ weeks of paid leave, simply because you decide to pop out a kid is either 1) on welfare themselves; 2) still living at home with mommy and daddy, or has access to their trust fund, or 3) works for the government.

News Flash, OP. You are not irreplaceable in the work force. I guarantee that if you quit tomorrow, your employer would have people lined up at the door within a week to take your job. Why in the world do you think someone else should pay to have dust cover your desk for 16 weeks, so that you can have your cake and eat it too? Your sense of entitlement is shocking.

PP, it sounds like you may have been given some very bad legal advice. Just because you call the individual an independent contractor, doesn't mean that the Deparment of Labor and the IRS are to agree with you. Also, federal FMLA only applies to employers with 50 or more employees; not a very small business. Finally, FMLA is unpaid leave, so the employer can use that money to hire a temp, etc. An employee can only be paid if she (or he) has paid vacation to be used during the FMLA leave.

I think I is more likely the regulations you are trying to avoid are paying social securities contributions, unemployment insurance costs, etc. You know, the things that other people have to pau for to make up for yo not carrying your weight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think the government or the employer should be responsible for providing ANY paid leave, honestly. People choose to have children, that should not have any effect on their employer and their need to run their business.

IMO allowing the parent to use whatever sick leave/vacation time is reasonable. Anything else (even unpaid) is beyond generous.

right - people choose to have children. however, since vast majority of people makes the same decision (namely, to have children) then everyone benefits from the policy at some point. the only people this hurts are people who choose not to have children, and this is just as well. having children is a contribution to the future of the society as well, so i don't mind if childless (a small number anyway) get a small penalty there.

Let me guess, you have children so you "don't mind" ? 42% of Gen X women are childless.

yes, i have children and this is probably the reason i don't mind. so what? since when is it a sin to be self-interested?

and more than a half of those childless women will, when everything is said and done, be mothers. i am gen Y and i am not done yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think the government or the employer should be responsible for providing ANY paid leave, honestly. People choose to have children, that should not have any effect on their employer and their need to run their business.

IMO allowing the parent to use whatever sick leave/vacation time is reasonable. Anything else (even unpaid) is beyond generous.

Do you have kids? I get 2 wks vacation and 1 wk sick. I should leave my baby at 3 wks old?

I have 4 kids.

Whether you leave your baby at 3 weeks is a decision you need to make for yourself. If you have 3 weeks, and your partner has 3 weeks, you could theoretically wait until the baby is 6 weeks before putting her in daycare. Or you could save enough money to last you to take whatever time off YOU feel is reasonable. Why should your employer be on the hook?

you sounds like SAHM that wants every woman to be a housewife.

[Anonymous]

I don't hear that from PP at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think the government or the employer should be responsible for providing ANY paid leave, honestly. People choose to have children, that should not have any effect on their employer and their need to run their business.

IMO allowing the parent to use whatever sick leave/vacation time is reasonable. Anything else (even unpaid) is beyond generous.

Do you have kids? I get 2 wks vacation and 1 wk sick. I should leave my baby at 3 wks old?

I have 4 kids.

Whether you leave your baby at 3 weeks is a decision you need to make for yourself. If you have 3 weeks, and your partner has 3 weeks, you could theoretically wait until the baby is 6 weeks before putting her in daycare. Or you could save enough money to last you to take whatever time off YOU feel is reasonable. Why should your employer be on the hook?

you sounds like SAHM that wants every woman to be a housewife.

I want every woman to do what SHE wants to do. On her own dime/own merit. Just like every man.

[Anonymous]

I think our maternity leave policies reflect our priorities as a society.

As a new mother, it's really hit me that we're all talk in this country when it comes to families and children.

I'm very lucky. My employer gave me 8 weeks paid maternity leave (it would have been 6, but I had an unplanned c-section). I didn't qualify for FMLA, but I obtained approval to take 12 total weeks of leave. I used a combination of annual and unpaid leave for the 4 weeks not covered by my employer.

I would have preferred 16 weeks, but I know I'm fortunate to have gotten what I did.

Personally, I'd like to see the government somehow reward or offer an incentive for employers like mine who offer paid maternity leave.