17 year old dd and breast augmentation

[Anonymous]

One of my close friends had this exact same problem, and her parents got her reduction on one side when she was 17.

The scars of living with lopsided breasts remained with her for years. Even after she had them fixed, she admitted to the fear of being intimate or just showing off her upper body, even around friends/women. I knew her for at least a year before she told me why she'd only ever dated one guy.

Look, my nipples don't both face front. But that's a different story than having one side significantly larger than another. Not only would I get it fixed, I would also get her counseling so, like my friend, this doesn't create a barrier between her and potential relationships down the road.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So the title alone makes me cringe but this is actually a topic of discussion in our household right now. My beautiful, smart, funny, daughter has asymmetrical breasts. Now I know almost everyone does to some extent but hers are at least a full cup difference. When she was 14 we started getting special fitting bras and I assumed they would even out but at this point I don't think they will and 3 different physicians agree. She really wants to get this corrected before college and I understand her pov but it makes me sad and wonder if I am sending the wrong message. Plus I don't think she is thinking long term, like breastfeeding ect. I know she wants to go to college and feel confident and although she hasnt directly admitted it to me I know she wants to feel comfortable naked with anyone if a relationship goes in that direction. Most of me thinks it's ok and she deserves to get it corrected but a small part of me wants her to accept her body as it is. I don't want this correction to lead to many unnecessary ones. Any perspectives? Thanks!

After looking at the breast website including the post surgical section, I would be skeptical about this surgery. If she has rounded breasts with normal nip and one is a b and the other a c then why bother? Most people have some variation between both of them. If one was skinny tubular and an a and the other looked like it was from a different body then I see an issue. Or a third nipple.

So you might be sending the wrong message. Victorias secret has bras where you can put inserts in -use light push up pad in one and not the other . AA and C are different. But A and B or B and C for similar shapes are not worth a surgery. So as a mom of a girl in college I guess I'd first try non-clinical bra shopping or at least do that before surgery if that route is taken.

[Anonymous]

I would let her do it.

I had huge boobs in high school and I had a reduction the summer before I started college. I was a runner and always had to wear two or three sports bras. It was awful on my small frame.

More than 15 years later, I have no regrets and I am glad I didn't suffer any longer.

It didn't turn me into a surgery junkie either. I've never had anything else done.

[Anonymous]

Which choice are you considering: implant to even out or reduction to even out?

I'd be ok with letting my dd get a reduction at that age, not an implant.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Thanks for all the advice. Her breasts are a cup to a cup and a half difference. We would get her larger breast reduced. This would make both breasts a medium A cup which looks great on her frame. One doctor pushed an implant over a reduction and we promptly got 2 more opinions who were equally open to either option. I like the idea about some therapy to make sure her expectations are realistic. Everyone we have seen has told me that breast development stops roughly 4 years after her first period and she has been having regular periods since age 11. I am tempted to make her wait till she is 19 (will be 18 in May) but I think she feels the ideal time is the summer before college which does make sense to me as well. Ugh very hard!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sort of random story, but it might help - one of my closest friends who I met in my late 20s had breast augmentation at the age of 19. She was entirely flat chested before then - I've seen pictures of her in bathing suits and she was totally flat as a board - so, she talked to her parents and they agreed to pay for the surgery. Her surgeon suggested C cups because she's curvy/hippy. She was happy; went for the surgery, recovered at home with her parents, etc...

But, she's one of the most insecure-with-men people I've ever met - and I honestly think it's because some part of her heard her parents say "Yes, your body is not good enough the way it is."

I bet her insecurities from earlier having a flat chest made a far larger impact on her psychologically. Imagine all the teasing when she was a teen, especially if she had brothers. Imagine never feeling liked you looked good in clothes while you and your friends were all discovering fashion. Imagine seeing all the cool, cute boys go for the developed girls and feeling like you can't even compete. Imagine to always having to explain why you have implants. Perhaps now with age and wisdom looking back on those years you may think that implants were not the right choice for your friend but did she ever get them removed (not for medical reasons)? I doubt it.

[Anonymous]

One thing I would closely question doctors about is the impact of hormonal birth control on her breasts as they are now. My breasts grew when I was on birth control pills (this was not a good thing). If hers might as well, and there is no way to know whether the growth would be symmetrical or not, it might be worth going on BCP now to see what happens. It would be terrible if she had the surgery and then had breast growth from contraceptives in a few years and ended up asymmetrical again.

[Anonymous]

I would let her do it. I would not be quick to think that an increase is worse than a reduction. I always thought breastfeeding after a reduction was harder than breastfeeding after an increase.

I am suprised at the amount of people who are saying she should just have to live with it. I am symmetrical and if I weren't, I think I would be extremely self concsious. Good or bad, it DOES affect how you feel.

[Anonymous]

I would let her do it, and I also would suggest that a reduction is more serious surgery than an augmentation.

[Anonymous]

I would go for an augmentation over a reduction. Not only is it an easier surgery, but an A-cup on even the skinniest body is very small. Even if she is size 0 now, she won't stay that way forever. Most people that size wish their breasts were a little bigger. So why subject her to a more complicated surgery, longer recovery period, more difficulty with breastfeeding, just because of the way the words "breast implant" make you feel?

[Anonymous]

In general I am against plastic surgery, but in this case, I think I would let my daughter do it. If you've taken her to 3 different doctors, and she knows the risks, I think it's the kind thing to do for your daughter.
Maybe you could have her talk to some people who have had the surgery and see what the recovery was like just to make sure she understands what she's doing.
Many people with implants can still breastfeed.

[Anonymous]

I would have her wait a while, OP. During the college years, it is not abnormal for there to continue to be some changes in weight and physical maturity, and you don't know how these changes in her body might affect the situation with her breasts. I also agree with the PP who mentioned BC pills; they quite often affect breast size.

[Anonymous]

Mine were asymetrical and also entirely too large for my frame. I had a reduction and lift in my 30s. If this would have been an option when I was yonger, I would have jumped on it. I do not think it would have resulting in a warped self-image as I'm very confident - I just wanted to have even breasts.

Assuming a physician told me it was okay healthwise at this age, I would probably entertain the idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would go for an augmentation over a reduction. Not only is it an easier surgery, but an A-cup on even the skinniest body is very small. Even if she is size 0 now, she won't stay that way forever. Most people that size wish their breasts were a little bigger. So why subject her to a more complicated surgery, longer recovery period, more difficulty with breastfeeding, just because of the way the words "breast implant" make you feel?

Tough choice, OP and lots to think about. I don't have any first hand advice about reduction/augmentation - have friends who have had both and are thrilled... but none before 30 years old.

But, as food for thought and to counter the above opinion about size- I am wear a "bearly A" and am thrilled with the size of my breasts- never wished for more. Yes, some clothes don't seem as filled out as they may, but I never "fall out" of things either. My DH also likes the size of my breasts (or at least says he does).

I think if it were my DD I'd talk with her and the surgeons and help her list/consider pros /cons. I like the idea of some therapy to talk through it all.

[Anonymous]

I would let her, particularly since she's choosing a smaller size than one that would have her breasts define who she is. She will still have one breast that will nurse just fine.

An A on a skinny person doesn't stay an A when they gain a bit more, so I wouldn't worry about them being too small.