I didn't expect to feel so sad...

[Anonymous]

I wish we weren't all having to deal with these rejections (it is never to hear that your child was somehow deemed less worthy than another child). I am glad that we are able to reach out to each other through this forum. Just take comfort that our dc are going to do well just because they have such caring and involved parents, no matter where they go to school. We got into one school, but were rejected by our top choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:wow, I wasn't anxious at all during the process and felt relatively calm this week. And then today, the slim envelope with the jaunty logo... Not even a WL, just a flat-out rejection. It was a shock, which is stupid-- of course if they only take 25% of applicants (or whatever), there are 2 other moms opening this letter today and only one mom opening an enrollment package. I get it... I just didn't expect to feel so bad about it.

Part of it is that I felt our child was kind of their target market. Plus we had some diversity going for us, and the kid had decent scores.

Anyway, just feeling sad tonight and putting it out there.

I remember it being worse than the first time I had my heart broken. I remember being numb for days . For us public wasn't an option because we don't live in bounds for Murch, Janey of Horace Mann. I'm sure your child is wonderful. Once you find a solution and are happy at a good school it will pass.

[Anonymous]

OP...FUCK 'EM! You and your family are on the path that you are meant to be on. You don't want people who don't want you....that and IT IS NOT PERSONAL! Your kid is still a rockstar...certain schools are NOT the only path and success...

I am sorry you are disappointed....it sucks to be rejected. Period

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was just mad rather than sad. Sidwell alum whose child was rejected.

You should be mad. Sidwell has changed, IMHO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was just mad rather than sad. Sidwell alum whose child was rejected.

You should be mad. Sidwell has changed, IMHO.

Which is probably why I am mad rather than sad. Mad that they would reject my child but not that sad because I am not sure I like what the school has become.

[Anonymous]

Take comfort that it really always does work out in the end. We went through this a couple of years ago and DS was W/L at all three schools to which we applied for K, despite 99.9 WPSII, great recommendations, and good play date. We were totally crushed given all the siblings that seemed to have such an easier route. It just didn't seem fair. Just bad luck that year -- we got over it. The following year he got into our first choice for 1st grade and he is having a phenomenal experience where he is. Looking back I wished I knew then what I know now - we/you have a great kid and he / she is going to end up in the right place eventually. Strange process, but don't over-interpret significance of the outcome in any given year.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure if this helps or not, but the truth of the matter is that for the PreK/K crowd, your child isn't being rejected - you are. And I say that as someone who received some really unexpectedly bad news today (parent was an alum, kid had super high test scores). Our kids don't have a track record yet - they aren't really the ones on trial at this stage. On the one hand, it sucks that we weren't "good enough" to get into a school we thought would be great for our dc. On the other hand, I know my kid is amazing and will thrive wherever s/he lands. In their quest for money or fame or whatever they are looking for, some schools miss out on sensational children. Their loss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can completely relate to OP. In fact, we applied to River School a few years ago. I remember deciding with my husband the night before the letter arrived that even if he got in, we shouldn't send him there because it was an insane amount of $$$ for age 2! And then he got rejected and I was like "what???" I mean, intellectually I was fine. But emotionally I felt the rejection right like a stab in the heart.

And it almost felt worse today! I mean, I could so easily visualize my son in our top choice. I guess I just wanted it so much for him. I want him to have more than I had. And I know its not really rational, but I'm sad. The whole thing is so stupid. I mean, I know that and I make fun of the process and really haven't felt caught up in the frenzy until today.
So I'm also a little surprised at my reaction too.

Oh my god, I hope you come back here and read my reply. My child was out-and-out rejected by the River School a few years back. First of all, it was considered a safety school in our neighborhood. Secondly, I hated the school, the depressing underground classrooms, and the asphalt roof playground. Anyhow, now all three of my children are at one of the city's best independent schools. So, please, hang in there. Your top choice might not be the right school for your child, and there is probably another letter out there accepting him/her at an even better school for your family. Good luck!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I'm not sure if this helps or not, but the truth of the matter is that for the PreK/K crowd, your child isn't being rejected - you are. And I say that as someone who received some really unexpectedly bad news today (parent was an alum, kid had super high test scores). Our kids don't have a track record yet - they aren't really the ones on trial at this stage. On the one hand, it sucks that we weren't "good enough" to get into a school we thought would be great for our dc. On the other hand, I know my kid is amazing and will thrive wherever s/he lands. In their quest for money or fame or whatever they are looking for, some schools miss out on sensational children. Their loss.

Well said.

[Anonymous]

Oh my god, I hope you come back here and read my reply. My child was out-and-out rejected by the River School a few years back. First of all, it was considered a safety school in our neighborhood. Secondly, I hated the school, the depressing underground classrooms, and the asphalt roof playground. Anyhow, now all three of my children are at one of the city's best independent schools. So, please, hang in there. Your top choice might not be the right school for your child, and there is probably another letter out there accepting him/her at an even better school for your family. Good luck!!!!!

Thanks for your words and thoughts! We are actually still waiting on 4 more schools (that's right, we applied to 6 schools for PK and I think that's how many I applied for college!), but one of them is another top choice. So I'm going to be superstitious and believe that your words are a good omen.

Thanks again!

[Anonymous]

Try to keep in mind that Pre-K is what we used to call nursery school. My 73 year old mother promised me that she would come up to DC from Arkansas and kick me in the goodies if I spent $30K a year for someone to supervise my son playing with blocks. She's not a dope, she's a pretty well known Arthurian scholar, got her MA at Stanford, PhD at U of MI. My point is that as long as our children are engaged and interested, curious and challenged, they will do very well in life whether that means being an accountant or an abstract artist. Seriously, save the money until senior high when it might matter. It's designed to be an impersonal process. There is no reflection on you or your child so don't take it that way. Pre-K is hyper competitive everywhere in the city right now. Take your kid to the zoo, read a story, relax.

[Anonymous]

Don't let it get you down. It is a crap shoot at a lot of these schools, some of which are overwhelmed with a lot of great applicants.

[Anonymous]

If you are talking PK or K -- and the school has an annual fundraising campaign or auction ... give them $150 or so. You will get a box checked so when you reapply you end up higher. (I am not kidding - this does work ... everyone will claim it doesn't, but it really does).

[Anonymous]

I just wanted to add that I was rejected by a Boston-area private day school when my parents (middle class, no connections) moved from another State (I was entering 2nd grade). I ended up going to a good public school in the suburbs through the 8th grade, was then admitted to every one of the boarding schools to which I applied, went to one of the most exclusive and then to Harvard for undergrad and Oxford for graduate school. I doubt that I would have done as well had I stayed in that private day school from the 2nd grade onwards.

I am sorry that you are feeling sad, but your child will thrive, perhaps even more so.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry that you're going through this much stress...but really, it's like playing the lottery....you enter, but the 'winners' are random...