Why are people on DCUM so rude and snarky?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think most people are helpful, but if you ask a dumb question or sound stupid, you will get called on it. In the "real world" no one would dare say things that are said on this site. I like it. To me, it is refreshingly brutal honesty. You can't get it anywhwere else.

I like it too. It's honest. I give tons of non-snarky advice and I stick up for people when the are being attacked (if i share their opinion, or sometimes just for the sake of being compassionate) but I also enjoy being honest. I find that the people who ask why posters here are so rude are often very rude themselves and probably used to being that kind of pushy without ever having it served right back at them. (Not you, OP -- I was expecting that but your post was perfectly nice.)

[Anonymous]

Because it's considered rude to be blunt and point out someone's stupidity IRL.

[Anonymous]

Because posters make it TOO damn easy! Ask an open ended question and I practically have to bite my tongue and rip my fingers off of the keyboard to stop myself.

Especially the women that get on here to vent about very hurtful things like re-gifting presents, guests stripping the bed, a stranger shhing her kid. Stop being so damn sensitive otherwise I will continue to be rude and snarky to your made up problems.

[Anonymous]

I'm convinced it is my miserable SIL on here half the time. Oh yeah, she's miserable and wouldn't think twice about kicking you when you are down.

[Anonymous]

It's sort of like this.

I refer to DCUM as *4chan for the perimenopausal mommy set*.

[Anonymous]

How about this:

You be less stupid and I'll be less snarky.

[jsteele]

Anonymous wrote:I refer to DCUM as *4chan for the perimenopausal mommy set*.

That is excellent. If I didn't want to attract more males to DCUM, I would adopt that as our slogan.

[Anonymous]

I thought it was because we weren't getting laid enough. That's what I read in an article, so it must be true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's sort of like this.

I refer to DCUM as *4chan for the perimenopausal mommy set*.

Except at 4chan, they don't muff the link.

[Anonymous]

This is funny. I thought this thread would be normal, decent people like me complaining about all the nasty bitches here. Instead, it's all the nasty bitches proudly (though anonymously) bragging about it. I thought teenage boys were the scourge of the internet, but they have nothing on you nasty, petty bitches.

I think the anonymity is a huge factor. Even a pseudonym is something to protect, if it's your whole identity on a board. The other problem with the anonymity is that you don't know if you're encountering multiple bitches or the same one over and over.

I think there are a lot of women here who:
- have little power in their real lives, and are frustrated about that;
- resent their husbands and kids, and can't express it in healthy ways;
- generally seethe with anger they don't know how to address in their real lives; and/or
- yes, are sad and angry about the fact that men don't want them anymore.

It's still a fairly small percentage of the posters - maybe only 10-20% - but that's a much higher proportion than on other boards I've visited.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is funny. I thought this thread would be normal, decent people like me complaining about all the nasty bitches here. Instead, it's all the nasty bitches proudly (though anonymously) bragging about it. I thought teenage boys were the scourge of the internet, but they have nothing on you nasty, petty bitches.

I think the anonymity is a huge factor. Even a pseudonym is something to protect, if it's your whole identity on a board. The other problem with the anonymity is that you don't know if you're encountering multiple bitches or the same one over and over.

I think there are a lot of women here who:
- have little power in their real lives, and are frustrated about that;
- resent their husbands and kids, and can't express it in healthy ways;
- generally seethe with anger they don't know how to address in their real lives; and/or
- yes, are sad and angry about the fact that men don't want them anymore.

It's still a fairly small percentage of the posters - maybe only
10-20% - but that's a much higher proportion than on other boards I've visited.

Bravo! this is exactly the kind of post I was referring to when I said most people who complain about the tone of DCUM are used to being the only bitch in town. Congrats, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is funny. I thought this thread would be normal, decent people like me complaining about all the nasty bitches here. Instead, it's all the nasty bitches proudly (though anonymously) bragging about it. I thought teenage boys were the scourge of the internet, but they have nothing on you nasty, petty bitches.

I think the anonymity is a huge factor. Even a pseudonym is something to protect, if it's your whole identity on a board. The other problem with the anonymity is that you don't know if you're encountering multiple bitches or the same one over and over.

I think there are a lot of women here who:
- have little power in their real lives, and are frustrated about that;
- resent their husbands and kids, and can't express it in healthy ways;
- generally seethe with anger they don't know how to address in their real lives; and/or
- yes, are sad and angry about the fact that men don't want them anymore.

It's still a fairly small percentage of the posters - maybe only 10-20% - but that's a much higher proportion than on other boards I've visited.

Give it a rest, Dr. Freud. Just let it be what it is. After a couple of days on DCUM you know what to expect. If you can't handle it, leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Give it a rest, Dr. Freud.

Er...I was trying to answer the question - that specifically requested analysis of DCUM posters.

Anonymous wrote:Just let it be what it is. After a couple of days on DCUM you know what to expect. If you can't handle it, leave.

So...You freely admit to being bitchy here. (I'm assuming that you're one of the earlier posters.) You have no interest in considering whether you should be nicer to innocent strangers. And anyone who would like to improve the tone of the community by reducing the impact of the minority of people who are nasty should STFU and leave.

That's why I find this thread funny - in a dark way, of course. Coming from an obviously morally defenseless position, the nasty posters are nonetheless eager to dole out advice, while simultaneously acknowledging their own misanthropy.

[Anonymous]

I do think a small handful have serious personality disorders. Firing your nanny because she fed your kid canned soup? Hurt and confused as to why your entire circle of friends has shunned you, saying you frighten their children? Those are just two threads I can think of . . . but there are some real nutsos.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Give it a rest, Dr. Freud.

Er...I was trying to answer the question - that specifically requested analysis of DCUM posters.

Anonymous wrote:Just let it be what it is. After a couple of days on DCUM you know what to expect. If you can't handle it, leave.

So...You freely admit to being bitchy here. (I'm assuming that you're one of the earlier posters.) You have no interest in considering whether you should be nicer to innocent strangers. And anyone who would like to improve the tone of the community by reducing the impact of the minority of people who are nasty should STFU and leave.

That's why I find this thread funny - in a dark way, of course. Coming from an obviously morally defenseless position, the nasty posters are nonetheless eager to dole out advice, while simultaneously acknowledging their own misanthropy.

With your sanctimony, what kind of responses do you think you're going to get?