I'm the Horrible MIL

[Anonymous]

I think I might puke. OP - you sound like a self-righteous daughter-in-law who hopes to use this some day as amo in your private battle with your MIL.

[Anonymous]

Huh?

[Anonymous]

OP, if you are for real, sometimes you don't like someone and you can't understand why:

"I do not like thee Dr. Fell.
The reason why, I cannot tell.
But, this I know, and know full well,
I do not like thee Dr. Fell."

You don't like her and you never will. If DIL is all the things you said that she is then she would not have poisoned grandkids against you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I saw my DIL today. I realized a few things about her. She is kind, educated, gracious, sensitive, warm, loving, graceful and beautiful, and is good to my son and their children. I could not have found a better match for my son if I had done so myself. I am not the type to give compliments. For some reason, I cannot accept her. There are many differences between us, but none that should matter. She has never done anything wrong. She would never hurt me or my family. Yet I feel the need to see or imagine the bad instead of seeing the good. I make remarks when I should not. I fail to think before I open my mouth. I do things that some would think are inappropriate. I do not include her. I favor the other grandkids even though the (4 only ones) to carry on the family name are as cute as can be, they do well in school, are kind and loving, and are really good kids.

Maybe I am jealous because they have the marriage, success or love I never had. Maybe it did not matter who my handsome son married, maybe I would have found fault with anyone. Maybe I am just an ogre. My son and DIL have worked so hard together, and some would say they deserve everything they have. I have never been there for them. I say I support them, but I have never shown it. My friends pick on their DIL's, and there I am, trying to add to the fury, though I really have nothing bad to say that is truthful. I am sure they have been through a lot that I don't know about. They have had a terrible year, one thing after another. They do not ask for anything.

I barely see their children. I read these boards and see posts about the "evil MIL", and realize maybe that is me.

I sense that this is a jilted DIL projecting.

[Anonymous]

Q:Why does an uninvolved grandmother read a parenting board?

A: if she is fake. I hope this poster is just having fun at our expense. If she is a DIL she has issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I am not getting any younger. I am trying to make things right.[b/] If only for myself. Honestly, I do not see myself reaching out to my DIL at this point. As I mentioned, I am not the type. It is not my way.[/b] But I do fear the grandchildren have already formed an unfavorable opinion of me. Should I be concerned with how they will remember me? They are all under age 10, FWIW. (The others are age 13-19, so I believe their opinion is probably formed.)

I have my own life going on. I date, read, etc. My life wasn't always easy. I forget that their life is not always easy either. They have nice things, and I fear I resent that.

Will my son resent me because I am not nicer to my DIL? Age brings you in touch with your mortality sometimes. I am not saying I am open to that much change.

It is not possible to "make things right" if you have decided you are "not the type" and it is "not your way" to do things differently.

Whatever you are doing isn't working for you, or you wouldn't have posted here. Therefore you either change your ways, or decide that you don't need to make things right.

[Anonymous]

Maybe multiple personality? I love the mentaly ill.

[Anonymous]

Dear Horrible MIL:

If you are real just give up already. You've already alienated yourself from your son and his family and since you are using the excuse of being set in your ways, then what's the point of even posting here? Boredom? From what you describe, I'm quite sure you've already established yourself as someone to be tolerated, not truly loved and admired. Children grow up despite their grandparents ignoring them. If you truly have no desire to make amends, then go on with your life and stop seeking out pity on anynomous message boards. And yes, of course your son resents you for not being kinder to his mate, the mother of his children. And you're jealous of their "nice things"? Really? Ick. Pathetic. Go away.

And if you're a DIL just trying to oddly vent about your MIL, stop already. Enjoy the family you've created.

[Anonymous]

I don't buy this either.

[Anonymous]

AdequateParent wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe multiple personality? I love the mentaly ill.

Wow. Poking fun at mentally ill people really makes you sound nicer than a fake poster or a mean mother-in-law. Nothing like using a population living with debilitating genetic illnesses as shorthand for people you don't like.

Irony impairment? I love the irretrievably dim.

Oh, Please. Give it a rest! She wasn't poking fun at the mentally ill, she made a pithy comment and it was funny. Do you ever laugh at anything? Most of your posts are just so damn politically correct, I want to throw up.

PP also has a point because a lot of the posts on DCUM are strange and one does have to wonder about their mental state.

Flame away, adequate parent. That is a silly name in my, not even remotely, humble opinion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I saw my DIL today. I realized a few things about her. She is kind, educated, gracious, sensitive, warm, loving, graceful and beautiful, and is good to my son and their children. I could not have found a better match for my son if I had done so myself. I am not the type to give compliments. For some reason, I cannot accept her. There are many differences between us, but none that should matter. She has never done anything wrong. She would never hurt me or my family. Yet I feel the need to see or imagine the bad instead of seeing the good. I make remarks when I should not. I fail to think before I open my mouth. I do things that some would think are inappropriate. I do not include her. I favor the other grandkids even though the (4 only ones) to carry on the family name are as cute as can be, they do well in school, are kind and loving, and are really good kids.

Maybe I am jealous because they have the marriage, success or love I never had. Maybe it did not matter who my handsome son married, maybe I would have found fault with anyone. Maybe I am just an ogre. My son and DIL have worked so hard together, and some would say they deserve everything they have. I have never been there for them. I say I support them, but I have never shown it. My friends pick on their DIL's, and there I am, trying to add to the fury, though I really have nothing bad to say that is truthful. I am sure they have been through a lot that I don't know about. They have had a terrible year, one thing after another. They do not ask for anything.

I barely see their children. I read these boards and see posts about the "evil MIL", and realize maybe that is me.

Badly written faux.

[Anonymous]

Not even a good attempt. Ugh, just bad. Give up the fiction writing, OP, and find something else to occupy your time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:


Oh, Please. Give it a rest! She wasn't poking fun at the mentally ill, she made a pithy comment and it was funny. Do you ever laugh at anything? Most of your posts are just so damn politically correct, I want to throw up.

PP also has a point because a lot of the posts on DCUM are strange and one does have to wonder about their mental state.

Flame away, adequate parent. That is a silly name in my, not even remotely, humble opinion.

Adequate Parent's posts are PC because she knows she has to stand by them. Something the rest of should try one day, just to see how many times we have to type and delete before we come up with something to which we would attach even our pseudonym.

[Anonymous]

"Adequate Parent's posts are PC because she knows she has to stand by them. Something the rest of should try one day, just to see how many times we have to type and delete before we come up with something to which we would attach even our pseudonym. "

Gibberish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I am jealous because they have the marriage, success or love I never had.

Don't worry, your nastiness towards the DIL and the grandkids is sure to be doing some damage to their marriage.