Former great beauties

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I think this is key:
she still carries herself with the same sexy confidence

I agree this important. OP do you think she doesn’t deserve to have this confidence anymore?

OP here: Of course she deserves to. But everybody deserves to — that doesn’t mean they can or do. Even objectively ugly people deserve to. Who was it who said: The ugly can be beautiful. The merely pretty — never.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here: I plugged my whole OP into google and learned that apparently how I feel about her former beauty is “incredibly common.”

Hmm

You and Google are living in an earlier insecure time when you couldn’t get the beautiful woman. Now you are dating the woman who wouldn’t date you decades ago. See Jeff Bezos.

Ooh, good point. I posted about confidence, but you could be on to something here. Maybe OP feels like he's finally won the hot sorority girl.

[Anonymous]

Weird post. I think men are attracted to beautiful young women because:

their bodies are simply attracted to them, like they have a physical response

they have an evolutionary mechanism telling them this is a healthy person to have healthy kids with

their inate sense of competition is satisfied if they have a partner lots of other men are trying to get

if they stay together for a long time, they will look at their partner and see them the way they looked when they were young. (this feels real, ive been with my husband for 20 years and he's always like "you havent changed a bit" which objectively cant be true).

My take on this post: the OP really wants people to know that his partner was hot when she was young in order to get the benefits of the above since it isnt obvious anymore, and so he's announcing it wherever he can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here: I plugged my whole OP into google and learned that apparently how I feel about her former beauty is “incredibly common.”

Hmm

I mean, domestic violence, human trafficking and tax fraud are also incredibly common. Doesn’t mean it’s ok.

[Anonymous]

It’s exhausting to be with a woman like that. Worst kinds are those that used to be beautiful and are now fat and still think they’re beautiful.

[Anonymous]

So you finally got to date a "hot beauty", huh? Funny how an old man still cares about a woman's looks.

[Anonymous]

You are one strange dude! My mother is 74 and she was movie star beautiful even until her early 40's. Her looks have changed but the way my father looks at her hasn't changed. We were recently at a wedding together and she was pretty glammed up and I could tell my Dad was still dazzled by her. At 74 she still looks great but she's 74.

[Anonymous]

"You are one strange dude! My mother is 74 and she was movie star beautiful even until her early 40's. Her looks have changed but the way my father looks at her hasn't changed. We were recently at a wedding together and she was pretty glammed up and I could tell my Dad was still dazzled by her. At 74 she still looks great but she's 74."

This makes zero sense. By your logic, your dad is also strange. He's referencing how she looked back in the day, and OP is referencing a photo of her. I'm guessing that both women were "well preserved" and still attractive for their current age. Nothing wrong with enjoying the fact that they are with the hot girl/now hot older woman.

I'm remarried to someone I met when we were in our late fifties. I found him attractive, in a late 50s sort of way. When I got to know him better and saw photos of him when he was in his 20s, 30s, and 40s, I was floored by how hot he was. And yes, it made me even more pleased to be with him. If he looked awful now, I don't think that his looks from his younger days would have made up for that when it came to whether I found him attractive. FWIW I looked hot when I was young and I've always dated hot guys. When you start to age (nearing 60), it's natural and normal to have to adjust your expectations for the looks of a partner who is similar in age. If you're used to being with hotties, you probably still want to be with them. They're just going to come with gray hair and some saggy skin now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So you're shallow. At least you can admit it.

I find it creepy that you place importance on the fact that she USED to be attractive.

He was probably a tool but now he has some money and he get pull down formerly hot chicks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"You are one strange dude! My mother is 74 and she was movie star beautiful even until her early 40's. Her looks have changed but the way my father looks at her hasn't changed. We were recently at a wedding together and she was pretty glammed up and I could tell my Dad was still dazzled by her. At 74 she still looks great but she's 74."

This makes zero sense. By your logic, your dad is also strange. He's referencing how she looked back in the day, and OP is referencing a photo of her. I'm guessing that both women were "well preserved" and still attractive for their current age. Nothing wrong with enjoying the fact that they are with the hot girl/now hot older woman.

I'm remarried to someone I met when we were in our late fifties. I found him attractive, in a late 50s sort of way. When I got to know him better and saw photos of him when he was in his 20s, 30s, and 40s, I was floored by how hot he was. And yes, it made me even more pleased to be with him. If he looked awful now, I don't think that his looks from his younger days would have made up for that when it came to whether I found him attractive. FWIW I looked hot when I was young and I've always dated hot guys. When you start to age (nearing 60), it's natural and normal to have to adjust your expectations for the looks of a partner who is similar in age. If you're used to being with hotties, you probably still want to be with them. They're just going to come with gray hair and some saggy skin now.

OP here: You are my people .

[Anonymous]

"So you finally got to date a "hot beauty", huh? Funny how an old man still cares about a woman's looks."

This is really unfair. There are dozens of posts here by women doing OLD after age 45. They go on and on about older men's profiles and how scruffy and poorly dressed the men in their age ranges are. They complain that they have lost their hair. They complain that they have gray hair that isn't colored. They complain that their skin shows sun damage from years of not using sunscreen. They complain about the tummy size. If older women are allowed to care about the looks of the older men they date/won't date, then why can't older men care about how women in their age range look? I'm almost 60 and I don't want to date an unkempt and out of shape man, and I wouldn't expect men to want to date me if I weren't still easy on the eyes. Of course, I don't want an older man to judge my looks against women who are half my age, so that means I shouldn't do that either when I'm sizing him up.

[Anonymous]

Curious how old you are OP and your GF.

[Anonymous]

I'm curious how old the PPs responding are. People who aren't yet "old" have all sorts of crazy ideas about how older people see themselves and others. I remember being 25 and thinking that my coworkers who were in their 50s were ancient and looked like my parents. (They indeed were my parents' age.) And since I imagined (wrongly) that my parents were no longer interested in sex, these people were also dried up old biddies in my eyes.

[Anonymous]

I've had a couple of women in their 50s share photos of themselves from their 20s or 30s. Some even do this on their dating app profiles. It usually doesn't work for me, but it does sometimes help me see a glimmer or something hot in the old woman sitting across from me. If the woman has aged very badly, like Bridget Fonda, seeing the old photos makes me sad and makes me wonder what happened to cause such a decline.

One woman, who is almost sixty and still very attractive, told me that nice men never approached her until she was in her 50s because she was so beautiful when she was younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m in a relationship with a woman who used to be very beautiful. Now that her looks have faded over the decades, she still carries herself with the same sexy confidence that highly attractive people often have. It is somehow very important to me that she was once beautiful, even though objectively she’s not better looking than some other women who were never beautiful. Do other people here put a big value on how hot their lovers used to be? Why should any of us care about someone’s former appearance?

That’s a mental block. This is important to Bezzos as he married a former beauty who was hot when he was young even though he could’ve married current Miss World.