Deerfield Academy vs DC Privates

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son was admitted to both Deerfield Academy boarding school in MA, Maret, and Potomac. He's excited by the possibility of Deerfield, but I am unsure. Does anyone here have any thoughts?

What are your hesitations OP? If you’re unsure about the boarding aspect? Why did you go down that road in the first place?

[Anonymous]

Definitely Deerfield - great drugs!

[Anonymous]

I would not send my 14-15 year old kid away. Those are really important years in your kid's life and I personally would keep him here. I would choose Maret or Potomac depending on which one is closer to you and also on which sports if any is important to your child.

[Anonymous]

Deerfield is an incredible school. Agree that it is apples and oranges to compare the boarding school experience to a DC day school. If DC wants the boarding experience it’s one of the best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Definitely Deerfield - great drugs!

Have you had a student at Deerfield to provide this insightful anecdote?

There may have been drugs back a while ago, which was the case for many (most?) of the elite boarding schools. I have no doubt that there are some kids who are partaking, particularly gummies. But the school has a strong stance and no tolerance for drugs. My kid did not experience any drug taking nor any pressure to partake when off campus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not send my 14-15 year old kid away. Those are really important years in your kid's life and I personally would keep him here. I would choose Maret or Potomac depending on which one is closer to you and also on which sports if any is important to your child.

We had this sentiment told to us many times when people found out our child was away at boarding school. We certainly did not 'send our kid away'. Our kid decided, after touring the local options and then visiting multiple elite schools in New England, that they absolutely wanted to go to boarding school. The opportunities, friendships, facilities, and faculty were unrivaled. The people berating us for sending our kid away have zero idea what they're missing. And that's fine. Our relationship is stronger with our kid than most of our friends who had kids attend the local privates. Those kids couldn't wait to get away from their parents for college. Not to mention the fact that transition to college was a breeze.

Boarding school is not a fit for many kids but it's a phenomenal opportunity for the right kid and family. I can assure you that there are very few kids who are 'sent away' and those who are don't thrive and often return home before the end of High School.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not send my 14-15 year old kid away. Those are really important years in your kid's life and I personally would keep him here. I would choose Maret or Potomac depending on which one is closer to you and also on which sports if any is important to your child.

+1000

I will never in a million years understand this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not send my 14-15 year old kid away. Those are really important years in your kid's life and I personally would keep him here. I would choose Maret or Potomac depending on which one is closer to you and also on which sports if any is important to your child.

We had this sentiment told to us many times when people found out our child was away at boarding school. We certainly did not 'send our kid away'. Our kid decided, after touring the local options and then visiting multiple elite schools in New England, that they absolutely wanted to go to boarding school. The opportunities, friendships, facilities, and faculty were unrivaled. The people berating us for sending our kid away have zero idea what they're missing. And that's fine. Our relationship is stronger with our kid than most of our friends who had kids attend the local privates. Those kids couldn't wait to get away from their parents for college. Not to mention the fact that transition to college was a breeze.

Boarding school is not a fit for many kids but it's a phenomenal opportunity for the right kid and family. I can assure you that there are very few kids who are 'sent away' and those who are don't thrive and often return home before the end of High School.

This is the most important thing right here. There is the right school and environment for each kid and a school that is just right for your kid might be a terrible fit and experience for my kid. It doesn't make that school a bad school. The best school for my kid is the place where they can thrive and do their best. Each family who is in this independent school game should be looking for that over and above rank (real or percieved), parent preferences, or opinions from the peanut gallery about what you should or shouldn't do.

[Anonymous]

I studied at a boarding HS. Now in my 40s, I regret the years that I could not enjoy at my family home. But I had great friends from boarding years that I still have connections. Having good and smart friends is a blessing. Your kid may have good and smart friends at a private school in DC but it would not feel the same as at a boarding school where you share a large portion of life together for 4 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not send my 14-15 year old kid away. Those are really important years in your kid's life and I personally would keep him here. I would choose Maret or Potomac depending on which one is closer to you and also on which sports if any is important to your child.

Agree. This is a symptom of the long running alien nation of our society. People don’t send your children away. These are precious days that you will never get back!!!

[Anonymous]

I, for one, welcome our alien nation overlords.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not send my 14-15 year old kid away. Those are really important years in your kid's life and I personally would keep him here. I would choose Maret or Potomac depending on which one is closer to you and also on which sports if any is important to your child.

We had this sentiment told to us many times when people found out our child was away at boarding school. We certainly did not 'send our kid away'. Our kid decided, after touring the local options and then visiting multiple elite schools in New England, that they absolutely wanted to go to boarding school. The opportunities, friendships, facilities, and faculty were unrivaled. The people berating us for sending our kid away have zero idea what they're missing. And that's fine. Our relationship is stronger with our kid than most of our friends who had kids attend the local privates. Those kids couldn't wait to get away from their parents for college. Not to mention the fact that transition to college was a breeze.

Boarding school is not a fit for many kids but it's a phenomenal opportunity for the right kid and family. I can assure you that there are very few kids who are 'sent away' and those who are don't thrive and often return home before the end of High School.

And you were doing so, so well.

This is such an obnoxious, defensive, and completely unnecessary retort. You have no idea how close or not close other kids are with their parents. Not only that, your retort can easily be turned completely around on its head. After all, you said didn't "send your kid away" -- you said they "wanted to go." So they "couldn't wait to get away from their parents" either; they just managed to get away earlier and you were happy to oblige.

As for the "breeze" of college transition, you don't need to send away a kid at 14 for that to happen. A happy and well adjusted kid will do just fine regardless.

[Anonymous]

For every kid that has had a positive experience at boarding school I would say there's at least two that had a horrible experience. I personally know at least one kid who was molested at a boarding school in the early 2010s. Keep in mind that Deerfield is far out in Western Massachusetts too. Additionally, boarding school kids tend to be the hardest partiers and drug users when they get to college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Definitely Deerfield - great drugs!

People don't understand the extent of drug problems at this school. Deerfield also has horrible campus security. I stayed in my friends dorm room around 2015 for 3 days and I wasn't a student. He and his friends would smoke weed right after school and occasionally do cocaine.

[Anonymous]

I’d keep them near home.