Working Parents — How integrate new job
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Anonymous
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I would try to feel it out in the interview process - ask how flexible the workplace is. Also, is it a meeting heavy job or a task heavy job? My job is meeting heavy and three times a week there are standing meetings that start at 9am (pre-covid they started at 8am) and I often have a formal speaking role. So rolling in at 9:30 every day would not be possible for me.
As a manager I let my team come in late on the days they are not involved in a 9am meeting but I can't guarantee that they won't be needed at 9am. So if starting at 9:30 was a deal breaker for someone, the job probably would not be a good fit and ultimately they would not be happy since the 9am meetings are high visibility and good for professional development. |
Anonymous
Yes, I mean if there's no work flexibility or family to help, solutions are: 1) before care 2) hire someone to do dropoff 3) see if a bus route would help, since the kids have to get on the bus way before school starts We did before care and after care for years because it was a trade-off for flexibility. Yes, it was $$, but both us having jobs was $$$. Explore what makes sense for your family. That being said, I agree with PPs that you should see if you can get some flexibility in the job (if you get it.) May be best to start by asking other folks who work there aboht implicit and explicit assumptions of hours on site. I would say that assuming you can start at 9:30 shouldn't be a given. I had a job that had 10-4 core hours even 10 years ago, but that's more an exception than a rule. There's a good chance you'd be needed on at least some calls prior to 9. Making everything work also depends on details like kids' ages etc. |
Anonymous
| I have to be at work at 7:30 so I drop my kid off at school for the before school program at 7:00. I pick him up at 5:00. |
Anonymous
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Changing jobs is stressful enough with every company laying off and the Fed RIFapalooza. I would not rock the boat and change jobs until you can commit 110% and work like someone without kids at all.
Start work after 9? That’s so unprofessional for your colleagues. Maybe become a freelancer if you want that kind of situation. |
Anonymous
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You interview, get an offer, then ask. You have no idea that another place doesn’t offer the same if not better flexibility.
For me, I was able to ask how my now boss handled the other part of her life. She was very clear that she meets her kids at the bus stop every day. She may be taking calls later because of it but that is part of her day and she extends those same conditions and trade offs to her team. |
Anonymous
I know right? And why do you think that you can’t figure it out. It really works out- working mom with two kids- I changed jobs multiple times and it works out. |
Anonymous
Because applying to jobs takes effort and time, and if one can get a sense that a certain ask isn't worth it, then they won't bother wasting that effort and time. |
Anonymous
| I think people are split on the sentiment above. I'm with the people who say just apply (instead of thinking about whether to) but see where you're coming from. |
Anonymous
It looks to me that you are lazy and can't solve a problem. Pre-covid, parents in the DMV did this all of the time. I am a long time federal manager and some of the things my staff can't seem to work out at home to make it to the office between 10 and 2:30 core hours is pretty ridiculous, - my kids need a hot breakfast and can't possibly ride the bus, needs to remote work twice a week for doctor's appointments when the spouse works from home full time, can't commute when their kids have a game after school. camps are expensive. I really wonder how much work people were doing pre RTO. I raised two kids and worked FT prior to covid (kids are 26 and 23), I paid for before care and I had a PT nanny after school (I paid them $30 per hour from 3:00-5:30pm), I paid thousands of dollars in summer camp and spent most of January figuring schedules. It was not that hard. |
Anonymous
There are no more nannies working $30/hr to drive your kids around; as they can pick up easier work do gig Uber Eats and DoorDash whenever they have free time (since they clearly don’t have a 9-5). Besides, tossing out $2k/month is hardly trivial for most family budgets. You need to earn $37k more in before tax dollars to pay for that nanny, so you need probably a $50k salary bump just to make job change worthwhile and worth the risk. |
Anonymous
btw all the camps we have gone to have at least doubled in cost post covid. |
Anonymous
They're communicating to you that this job is not worth solving these problems. Maybe that's a misjudgment on their part, but it's not being unable to solve them. |
Anonymous
| If it is daycare and ES ages, there is something called before care and aftercare. Mine opens at 7am to 9am and 3:30pm to 6:30pm. I just use money to solve this issue. |
Anonymous
Do most job changes come with a $50k salary bump? that's the only scenario where it works about by using PP's approach. |
Anonymous
Yeah, having your kids in childcare for 12h a day, that's the best plan to advance your career. |