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Never had these growing up and our current neighborhood doesn't either.
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I think people are more comfortable now saying "no" to things that feel like obligations vs something they really want to do.
I do a get together with a few close friends. It's enjoyable with people I really like to spend time with instead of people who happen to live near me. |
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My neighbors host several parties a year, and DH and I host at least one party a year. We also have two neighborhood block parties sponsored by the HOA.
That being said, every time I’ve asked for recipe ideas for either a ladies’ game night or potluck for the block parties, a few people shyt on the very idea of such lowbrow pursuits. So there are definitely a lot of you out there who would rather be prissy than be fun and welcoming. |
| We never attend our neighborhood party - we're too busy. We do attend our neighbor's party: they've very nice and it's always a lovely time for everyone. |
| It’s a bad habit . We do poker night that’s it |
Sounds like the opposite of fun |
| Boundaries. |
Yes, you proved my point. My neighbors have fun and are welcoming, but a lot of DCUM posters complain about people not hosting anymore, and it’s because of boring, snooty people like you. |
Yep. That’s exactly why people are lonelier now than ever. |
You can't post photos of your Costco spread on Insta. You need a jaw dropping charcuterie board, and signature cocktail with Rosemary sprigs to get those likes. And if you can't post your party on social, is there even a point to having a party? Sigh.. Besides that the first question is always who will be there. Men especially seem to dislike parties that have anyone other than their closest bros there who they might get stuck talking to. |
But if you DO have the audacity to post your modest event online, boy you are a b-word. Only your neighborhood ladies were invited to your small holiday gathering, and now all the people you know who don’t happen to live in your neighborhood are left out. Because you’re a Mean Girl, a Mean Girl, I tell you! How dare you post a picture of a casual gathering, knowing full well not everyone you ever met was invited?! |
| I think it has to do with permanency of your network - the amount of people who live further away from where they grew up now is higher than it was in the 50s. Hence lots of people travel for the holidays and are out of town, those remaining g behind don’t want to throw parties for just a handful of people? |
This is part of it for sure. My daughter has 1 friend of maybe 10ish of her closest friends in town this week, and that friend is booked solid with cousin/aunt/uncle visiting. All of my friends are out of town. I'll note that my family is mostly no longer living, so I took the advice of building my own chosen family. Except that my chosen family happens to have their own families that they go visit on holidays. I'm going crazy not being able to have anyone over and I can't even text or FaceTime to catch up with my out-of-town friends and family because they're all busy hosting their own guests. We make up for it by hosting early in the season right after Thanksgiving and in the first week of December, but then this part of the season feels lonely and empty. And our neighborhood is totally dead- I have no idea where everyone has gone, so even if I wanted to invite neighbors who I don't know well over for something, there's no one home. |
| My brother's neighborhood in Fairfax Station does. I haven't seen it anywhere else (I've lived in a few neighborhoods in North Arlington, Falls Church, and Vienna over the last 20 yrs or so). |
Why is this? I've noticed it too. When I was a kid, the dads would hang out with anyone. Now they sulk in a corner on their phone if their BFF isn't there, and that's if they even show up. We've tried to host so many family or couples events that turned into mostly ladies' nights because the men had all sorts of excuses. |