Is this tacky to give cleaner for Christmas?

[Anonymous]

I use a cleaning service and would never consider tipping more at Christmas. As a kid, my family had a regular housekeeper, who we actually knew, and of course she got a Christmas bonus and gift. It depends on your relationship. But soap making kit? That’s so random and weird.

I’ll also say I am a busy mom and have a physically demanding job (nurse) and I’ve kind of resented it when my child-free, office working sister and friends have given me hobby or craft gifts. It makes me feel unseen. The last thing I need is something to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:6:9 again! For some reason I am so riled up by this. Your friend is flouting the standard expectation that a holiday bonus is the cash amount of one cleaning session.

I never heard this standard. Bonuses aren’t required. I do think the gift is tacky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t care for the soap gift, but I also don’t understand why you have to tip every person that crosses the threshold of your house. House cleaner charges X amount and you agree to it. The end.

The house cleaner is not every person. She had cleaned our house every 2 weeks now for almost 13 years. I want to show my appreciation,

[Anonymous]

She is horrible, to be sure. I had two women come to clean yesterday; they are not regulars. I do not normally have housecleaning, just a one-time thing. I gave each of them 20 as a tip because it is Christmas.
I live in another country, and there I buy gifts for my once-a-week cleaners, and I will tip them cash.

[Anonymous]

I think this post is fake but I will play anyway. It would be better to give nothing as a bonus than a soap making kit. Its offensive. And if shes not talking to you good she's not a friend if she ignores the truth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t care for the soap gift, but I also don’t understand why you have to tip every person that crosses the threshold of your house. House cleaner charges X amount and you agree to it. The end.

The house cleaner is not every person. She had cleaned our house every 2 weeks now for almost 13 years. I want to show my appreciation,

100%

[Anonymous]

Tacky is not the right word, but yeah, it's a terrible gift. The best gift for people who work for you is a bonus. Second best is a gift card. Third best is a heartfelt note of gratitude and some baked goods. I know some people would think that third one is terrible but I get that money is really tight for some folks and there really might not be funds for financial gifts, so at least a clear acknowledgment of their contributions and some kind of effort is better than nothing.

Anything else... just don't.

[Anonymous]

It's not great. The cleaner won't want it, and might find the fact that she is your cleaner and it is "soap" mildly insulting. Undoubtedly they would rather have the money it cost to buy it. But it's not the end of the world either.

If I had regular cleaners, which I no longer do, I'd tip them at least $100 extra for the holidays, or maybe up to the cost of one cleaning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Holy crap, that’s insulting. It screams “regift,” even if it isn’t. A cleaning person deserves money as a gift. You don’t know them or their circumstances well enough to choose a personal gift for them. And they likely aren’t earning SO much that they couldn’t use more cash. Cash is the answer.

Soap-making kit is awful. Your weird friend doesn’t know if the woman has sensitive skin or allergies or a soap she already lives or zero interest in craft projects. And maybe she wants to get away from gifts related to cleaning ANYTHING!

The more I think about it, the more I think your friend and her husband are cheap jerks who lack all empathy. Jeezus.

Shut up

[Anonymous]

The gift screams of your friend and her husband trying to keep the cleaner "in her place." They don't want to see nor be part of her getting ahead. You have gross friends.

[Anonymous]

No gift would be better than this.

Their requires the cleaner to show fake gratitude and pretend to like this trash. It gives the employer the feeling that they did something good when she actually insulted her employee.

OP I think you should give your friend a soap making kit for all future holidays, birthdays, milestones, etc! You know, since she’s so into that stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No gift would be better than this.

Their requires the cleaner to show fake gratitude and pretend to like this trash. It gives the employer the feeling that they did something good when she actually insulted her employee.

OP I think you should give your friend a soap making kit for all future holidays, birthdays, milestones, etc! You know, since she’s so into that stuff.

OP here. She's really more of a peripheral friend who is part of the group because a few other people really like her, which I truly do not understand. This isn't the only thoughtless/selfish thing she's done.

[Anonymous]

$$$ is the only appropriate answer

[Anonymous]

People who work hard for low pay for a living love receiving gifts that insinuating that their job is a fun hobby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:6:9 again! For some reason I am so riled up by this. Your friend is flouting the standard expectation that a holiday bonus is the cash amount of one cleaning session.

I never heard this standard. Bonuses aren’t required. I do think the gift is tacky.

Yes, this IS standard. I wouldn't be surprised if your housekeeper finds a new house to clean on your day and has to bow out - why work for someone who doesn't care about them?