Really stressed right now

[Anonymous]

Your kid is so stressed from their home environment that they went to the school counselor and you're on here ranting that you're the one who is stressed? SMH.

[Anonymous]

You are crazy Indian

[Anonymous]

Don’t be worried. Ignore these posters telling you that you should be concerned. My kids tell us that we scream at them all all of the time and it’s not right. Their version of screaming is us telling them to do things they don’t want to do, like the the dishes they made and their own laundry or basic stuff around the house. All of a sudden we are accused of screaming.

I am a teacher. Counselors hear it all. No, they will not be writing a report on your family because a kid says a parent yells at them. It would have to be something really serious for them to get involved.

[Anonymous]

I'm a teacher and I've seen parents threaten to hit their kids right in front of me. CPS says that's allowed as long we we don't see any visible marks, bruises, injuries, etc. Not saying it's okay but they'v got their hands full as it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t be worried. Ignore these posters telling you that you should be concerned. My kids tell us that we scream at them all all of the time and it’s not right. Their version of screaming is us telling them to do things they don’t want to do, like the the dishes they made and their own laundry or basic stuff around the house. All of a sudden we are accused of screaming.

I am a teacher. Counselors hear it all. No, they will not be writing a report on your family because a kid says a parent yells at them. It would have to be something really serious for them to get involved.

This is a horrible message. You have zero clue what sort of screaming OP’s kids are subjected to. Don’t dismiss what may very well be emotional abuse.

[Anonymous]

What kind of screaming is it? We’re immigrants and my DH loses his stuff sometimes bc kid is disrespectful. It’s the one thing he won’t stand for.

Raising teens is not for the weak.

[Anonymous]

We are immigrants and in OUR home we are raising our kids in OUR culture. This includes talking in loud voices. Im sure other cultures would call it screaming. But that's part of how we discipline our children.

Outside of home they learn USA culture, music and food. They will grow up hybrid. Hopefully best of both worlds. But their foundation is from our parent culture and custom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What kind of screaming is it? We’re immigrants and my DH loses his stuff sometimes bc kid is disrespectful. It’s the one thing he won’t stand for.

Raising teens is not for the weak.

So you expect your kid to show respect buy your DH is so emotionally immature he can’t control his temper? Hmmm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are immigrants and in OUR home we are raising our kids in OUR culture. This includes talking in loud voices. Im sure other cultures would call it screaming. But that's part of how we discipline our children.

Outside of home they learn USA culture, music and food. They will grow up hybrid. Hopefully best of both worlds. But their foundation is from our parent culture and custom.

Screaming is abuse. Culture is an excuse.

[Anonymous]

NO! in 90% of the world, disciplining your children in a loud voice/ shouting / screaming is NOT abuse.

[Anonymous]

As someone going through a divorce from an abusive DH, I promise you that no one will raise an eyebrow at a dad yelling at a kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t be worried. Ignore these posters telling you that you should be concerned. My kids tell us that we scream at them all all of the time and it’s not right. Their version of screaming is us telling them to do things they don’t want to do, like the the dishes they made and their own laundry or basic stuff around the house. All of a sudden we are accused of screaming.

I am a teacher. Counselors hear it all. No, they will not be writing a report on your family because a kid says a parent yells at them. It would have to be something really serious for them to get involved.

This is a horrible message. You have zero clue what sort of screaming OP’s kids are subjected to. Don’t dismiss what may very well be emotional abuse.

CPS isn’t going to do anything for emotional abuse and either is the school counselor. You are right, I don’t know what dad is saying. But OP doesn’t need to be terrified. And I do think a lot of you are overreacting in your responses.

You never yell at your kids? I just don’t believe that. It doesn’t make it abuse. Maybe it is because I am around teens all day, every day but so many call everything yelling now when they don’t want to do something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are immigrants and in OUR home we are raising our kids in OUR culture. This includes talking in loud voices. Im sure other cultures would call it screaming. But that's part of how we discipline our children.

Outside of home they learn USA culture, music and food. They will grow up hybrid. Hopefully best of both worlds. But their foundation is from our parent culture and custom.

I'm all for people maintaing and embracing/passing on their home culture when they immigrate (both my parents are immigrants). But some things it's good that they're illegal to pass on. Honor killings are also part of some cultures. Anyone who thinks that is legal here and won't get them in serious trouble is very wrong.

Not everything that is a part of someone's original culture is legal and some things that are part of many cultures can do serious harm to kids (and adults). A parent or family can be as outraged as they want to, but if it really seems to be harming their child, their may be efforts to intervene or for the serious stuff, actual CPS reports. I doubt OP has to worry, but the idea that you're just going to raise you child in your culture no matter where you are is mostly beautiful, and also sometimes according to local laws and culture some things are very wrong.

There is way too much domestic violence in the US that never gets reported or addressed, but it's good that honor killings or cutting little girls' bodies and physical or sexual abuse are against the law here.

[Anonymous]

If screaming was considered abuse 90% of the world would be checked by CPS. This “gentle parenting” has gone too far. You mean to tell me you don’t scream at your kids? That’s a lie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What kind of screaming is it? We’re immigrants and my DH loses his stuff sometimes bc kid is disrespectful. It’s the one thing he won’t stand for.

Raising teens is not for the weak.

You need to get your husband corrected. If he can't manage his emotions and stop behaving like a toddler, how can he reasonably expect maturity from his children? Your husband sounds defective. Have you told him this? What shitty parenting.