DH is a womanizer

[Anonymous]

The man is lying to you—everyday. How do you reconcile that fact? And, you consider him your best friend? Dig deep, this man does not deserve you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend has stayed with her cheating husband. She's known he's cheated on her since they were dating, even the early stages. Now they have 2 young kids and he provides a lifestyle she wouldn't be able to have on her own. Her self esteem has also taken a major hit. But, they do love each other and they do have a good time together. She's somehow managed to just accept it and pretend it doesn't happen anymore. I still think it'll blow up at some point, but no one would ever guess that this is what their marriage is actually like. They look happy together, affectionate, every bit like a typical loving couple.

Curious, what makes you say he loves her?

I spend enough time with them to see it. You can see his love for her in how he talks to her and does things with her and looks at her. It's like a true Jekyll and Hyde situation.

I have a “friend” like this too—he loves his wife but steps out and has a reputation in our circle. I have dialed down our friendship to almost nothing because of it.

[Anonymous]

Divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend has stayed with her cheating husband. She's known he's cheated on her since they were dating, even the early stages. Now they have 2 young kids and he provides a lifestyle she wouldn't be able to have on her own. Her self esteem has also taken a major hit. But, they do love each other and they do have a good time together. She's somehow managed to just accept it and pretend it doesn't happen anymore. I still think it'll blow up at some point, but no one would ever guess that this is what their marriage is actually like. They look happy together, affectionate, every bit like a typical loving couple.

No thanks. Ever....but ok.

[Anonymous]

Not trying to be snarky OP but you are nuts for staying w/your husband! 😱

In nicer terms, you are wasting your life.
The more you invest in this man - the more you are throwing your good years down the drain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The man is lying to you—everyday. How do you reconcile that fact? And, you consider him your best friend? Dig deep, this man does not deserve you.

+1. To each her own, but I think you’re selling yourself short. If he were your best friend, he would be honest with you and wouldn’t hurt you in this way.

[Anonymous]

My poor sister is in this situation. He is SO charming, handsome and makes a lot of money. Everyone adores him and I'm the only one who knows the hell she is in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My poor sister is in this situation. He is SO charming, handsome and makes a lot of money. Everyone adores him and I'm the only one who knows the hell she is in.

My uncle was like this and my aunt stayed because she had no skills to work and no family support. He had a whole second family he would parade right under her nose and managed to alienate their own children against her saying she was crazy.

[Anonymous]

If it works for you, it works for you.

The question is whether sexual fidelity is something you need in a marriage (if so, divorce) or if it’s not a concern (in which case why not open up the marriage so both of you can have fun and there isn’t the headache of lying and cheating.)

Some people genuinely don’t care if their spouse is sleeping with others provided they provide whatever else that person needs from the marriage. If that’s you, and genuinely so, great. If not, you will just make yourself miserable so pls walk.

[Anonymous]

If he’s your BFF then divorce and let him go be with as many women as he can handle. It’s what he wants.
Just take him for everything he’s got. He owes you that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My poor sister is in this situation. He is SO charming, handsome and makes a lot of money. Everyone adores him and I'm the only one who knows the hell she is in.

My uncle was like this and my aunt stayed because she had no skills to work and no family support. He had a whole second family he would parade right under her nose and managed to alienate their own children against her saying she was crazy.

Well I would support her. But I think it would kill my mom to know. She is constantly comparing him to my low-earning husband "he's such a good provider! He takes care of his family" and I can't say anything.

[Anonymous]

Your self esteem must be in the toilet. I’m sorry this is how your life turned out 😞

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not trying to be snarky OP but you are nuts for staying w/your husband! 😱

In nicer terms, you are wasting your life.
The more you invest in this man - the more you are throwing your good years down the drain.

How is OP wasting her life? It depends on what else he brings to the table. if he’s great with the kids, she’s attached to her in-laws, he provides financial stability, outside of the cheating they make good memories together then I can understand why OP may stay. It’s all in how you deal with your reality. It doesn’t have to be a huge deal if you can put boundaries around it and get other needs met. it’s completely reasonable for someone to not be able to deal with this as well. Each person gets to decide what matters most to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not trying to be snarky OP but you are nuts for staying w/your husband! 😱

In nicer terms, you are wasting your life.
The more you invest in this man - the more you are throwing your good years down the drain.

How is OP wasting her life? It depends on what else he brings to the table. if he’s great with the kids, she’s attached to her in-laws, he provides financial stability, outside of the cheating they make good memories together then I can understand why OP may stay. It’s all in how you deal with your reality. It doesn’t have to be a huge deal if you can put boundaries around it and get other needs met. it’s completely reasonable for someone to not be able to deal with this as well. Each person gets to decide what matters most to them.

A cheating lying spouse voids ALL of what you've mentioned.

[Anonymous]

Require more for yourself.