Assisted living for an active alcoholic

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would it be better to hire a live-in caregiver(s) so that he can stay in his own home?

We may need to do this but he is really looking for a living situation where he can have a social life.

He is a drunk, but a charming and social one. The loneliness of his living situation only makes his mental health worse.

In that case, I'm not sure the assisted living will do anything about his drinking... can his prescribing doctor note in his file that alcohol should only be withdrawn progressively and under medical supervision?

[Anonymous]

My Godfather's alcoholic older sister spent a long time in rehab after back surgery - somehow she managed to sneak in bottles without anyone being the wiser.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can't he buy it himself in assisted living? When he'll be in memory care, he won't, but honestly by then he'll have other problems to worry about.

Oh he's able to buy it himself or pay someone to get it for him, no problem.

My concern is that he won't meet criteria for admission if he's an active alcoholic who would go into withdrawal if his supply is cut off. It would be a disaster if a nurse or orderly found his stash and poured it out.

Really? How would he react? I assume there must be a certain number of behavioral problems (of all sorts) among seniors.

He would be seriously ill from alcohol withdrawal. It would be life threatening.

So why would they take away his alcohol if he's a functioning alcoholic and risks withdrawal symptoms?

That's what I'm asking I guess. Would an assisted living facility just leave him alone with his booze?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would it be better to hire a live-in caregiver(s) so that he can stay in his own home?

We may need to do this but he is really looking for a living situation where he can have a social life.

He is a drunk, but a charming and social one. The loneliness of his living situation only makes his mental health worse.

In that case, I'm not sure the assisted living will do anything about his drinking... can his prescribing doctor note in his file that alcohol should only be withdrawn progressively and under medical supervision?

Yes, I am sure he can get a note from his doctor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assisted or Independent? My Dad is in an Independent home, he has his own apartment, but everything is included, meals, cleaning, etc. His apartment has a kitchen and there’s beer in the fridge. No one would think of tossing it out.

Independent could work for now. Our concern is that he could take a turn for the worse at any moment (history of stroke, the falling, etc) so if he were 'upgraded' to assisted then he'd still need no one to touch his booze. He cannot detox outside of a hospital setting.

Where is your father if you don't mind sharing?

He’s in Brightview just North of Baltimore. I’d assume if he takes a turn for the worse, they’d know how to detox him in a healthy way, but just assuming.

[Anonymous]

Do you really mean "assisted" living or do you just need an over 55 community?

[Anonymous]

If money is not object, at the least spend some $$$s talking to an elder care consultant and be honest.

Money has a way of solving all problems...though I am sure AL places would be concerned about liability issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would it be better to hire a live-in caregiver(s) so that he can stay in his own home?

We may need to do this but he is really looking for a living situation where he can have a social life.

He is a drunk, but a charming and social one. The loneliness of his living situation only makes his mental health worse.

Sounds like he needs a wealthy girlfriend to go out with someone. How would you feel about that possibility?

[Anonymous]

We saw facilities that had happy hours. I agree with hiring an eldercare consultant and see if you can sign away your rights to sue. That may help. Otherwise he's a liability as mentioned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would it be better to hire a live-in caregiver(s) so that he can stay in his own home?

We may need to do this but he is really looking for a living situation where he can have a social life.

He is a drunk, but a charming and social one. The loneliness of his living situation only makes his mental health worse.

Sounds like he needs a wealthy girlfriend to go out with someone. How would you feel about that possibility?

Only if his estate is 100% locked down.

[Anonymous]

I think most would let him keep it in his room assuming no behavior problems impacting other residents. But you should just ask the intake person who gives tours. They’ve heard it all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can't he buy it himself in assisted living? When he'll be in memory care, he won't, but honestly by then he'll have other problems to worry about.

Oh he's able to buy it himself or pay someone to get it for him, no problem.

My concern is that he won't meet criteria for admission if he's an active alcoholic who would go into withdrawal if his supply is cut off. It would be a disaster if a nurse or orderly found his stash and poured it out.

Really? How would he react? I assume there must be a certain number of behavioral problems (of all sorts) among seniors.

There can be secure physical symptoms and even death from alcohol withdrawal.

This. It happened to a relative.

[Anonymous]

I would use a consultant. My mom used one to find an assisted living facility for her mom (different issues mental health issues), and it worked out well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would it be better to hire a live-in caregiver(s) so that he can stay in his own home?

We may need to do this but he is really looking for a living situation where he can have a social life.

He is a drunk, but a charming and social one. The loneliness of his living situation only makes his mental health worse.

Sounds like he needs a wealthy girlfriend to go out with someone. How would you feel about that possibility?

Only if his estate is 100% locked down.

Do this anyway: dating, sex, and even remarriage is really common in independent and assisted living facilities. There are more single women than men, so your dad will have plenty of options (assuming he is heterosexual).

[Anonymous]

Rockville Villages has alcohol (bar & restaurant on site), and a graduated system of care.