+1 Unfortunately, my DC had to go with our "top choice" as it was an in-state school. Even though her dream school was out of state, we couldn't help her financially achieve it and she had no aid or merit. It was super tough on all of us, but she was 17 when was was making this decision. We decided not to let a 17 year old saddle herself with that much debt. Even though she finds our in-state school "less exciting," she can graduate debt free. |
DD attended overnight admitted students days - alone. One felt like she was “home” so she picked it. The other had put on the most amazing weekend but she was well aware that was not predictive of campus life! |
We are paying so we get final say. Kids can’t borrow full COA anymore so no way for our kid to attend top choice at $95k/yr without our approval (aka check book!). Kid is at lowest cost option. Student loan limits are: 1st-year undergrad 5,500 2nd-year undergrad 6,500 3rd- & 4th-year undergrad 7,500 Limit for all 4 years 31,000 Many parents do not realize things have changed and their kid cannot borrow for school like they did. Now, the parents can borrow full COA, but rates and origination fees are insane. And they are the parents’ loans, not the kids. |
Yup |
When DS applied to schools, we told him not to apply anywhere that he can't be happy. He wants a larger school, preferably a strong state flagship, so it was pretty easy to take a tiered approach where he is extremely likely to get into 3 or four schools.
The only mistake we made was encouraging him to apply to a private without fully considering the cost- which is outrageous (and considering how much college costs these days, that's saying something). We told him if that comes through it's a "no"- we're not permitting student loan debt, we plan to retire before we work ourselves to death, and his 529 won't cover all four years. Fortunately, he's a reasonable kid with only a small drop of entitlement, so he complained and moved on. |
Great approach |
My DD had two colleges to choose from, for the same major. Cost was almost the same, A was very close to home, like a 30 minute bus ride and B 4 hrs drive away. A was in the middle of a city she loved and B was just outside another city she loved (20 mins?). She chose B because when she looked at the fine details of the major, there was more on offer a B. There were more options to follow thru to PhD than if she'd chosen A which was a narrower academic course.
So it was the course and the long term prospects that swung it. |
Kid joined the incoming class Discord group to see if he fit in. |
Terrible situation for your kid to be in. Instead of making the decision for your kid, you should have done a better job guiding him to only apply to colleges you and your family can afford. Or at least gamble on the ones that typically offer a lot of need-based money. I would never dare to select my child’s college for him…. |
Excellent. |
Went to admitted students days and made the decision that way: they had four top-10s that admitted them and they picked the best fit /best program which happened to be one of the ivies |
My kids factored in cost, academics, distance from home and gut feeling. |
I’m not PP but this is absolutely not a “terrible situation.” You never know what the merit aid package might be like until you apply. To not have financial considerations is very, very rare (even if not rare on this site). |
It was a stressful situation at our house. Spouse had a strong opinion that he tried to express but not forcefully. I had no idea and kid struggled with decision. Kid ended up not picking spouse’s preference and basically went with “gut feel.” It totally worked out because I think had we pressured to pick the other school, any dips in the experience might have been blamed on us. |
Why would you let your DC apply and tell them “if that comes through it is a no”? What a waste of time and resources. NPC is very accurate, so no reason to be surprised by the cost of attendance. |