Sister walks in with same engagement ring as you...what would you do?

[Anonymous]

I don't get it....the ring is exactly the same but much bigger? So it's simply the same cut? OP, there are only about 4-5 cuts of diamond. It was nice of your sister to ask but really, what if she preferred a round cut (for example)...you don't "own" the round cut or princess cut. Do you "just die" everytime you see someone with a solitaire engagement ring???

[Anonymous]

The love between two sisters, and the clear admiration she has for your taste, is a much nicer story to tell, IMHO. I hope the bad taste in your mouth changes over time. I fear that if it doesn't people may not understand your feelings.

Maybe you could use this to create a family "style". Make a big deal of it and call it your trademark. Pretend to have fun with it and soon you might actually believe it!

[Anonymous]

it is like both of us having the tiffany legacy ring. same cut, setting, etc. yes i think its odd. yes i will get over it.

[Anonymous]

Yes- I have the Tiffany 3 stone Lucida, round cut. I sure hope I'm the only one!

[Anonymous]

OP, maybe I'm obtuse, but can you articulate why this bothers you so much? Being sincere not snarky.

[Anonymous]

I would be so flattered. My sisters hate my taste and say I dress like a grandma. I will never have your problem as mine is a pearl ring surrounded by small diamonds -- not many people hanker after that look.

[Anonymous]

I picked up some stones overseas and them set there as well. Turns out it was I chose the exact same setting as my grandmother has. The rings are near identical. I hadn't seen my grandmother's rings in 4 years and then had only seen them on her finger. Go figure. Unless you're working with an artiste, there are hundreds of other women walking around with the exact same setting you have. I don't know what the big deal is. It's not like you're showing up to the same party in an identical dress.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How unique are engagement rings, anyway? The only people I see with really "unique" rings are people with ugly rings.

I have a 2 ct round solitaire with tiny diamonds around the band, and so do a million others. It doesn't bother me in the least.

I have a pretty unique ring - platinum diamond and sapphire art deco circa 1923. Yes, there might be others out there very similar to mine but I doubt I'll come across one that is identical. My ring is GORGEOUS and unique and NOT ugly.

That being said, I agree with PPs. If you have a pretty classic ring, it's not likely to be unique anyway. Your sister did ask you (which was very considerate of her!) so you I don't think you can or should say anything to her.

[Anonymous]

OP, I know exactly what you mean. I have seen it where someone copied someone else's unique (and very large diamond) ring. In that case, the copier was jealous and had the ring copied so she would not feel that (the one she copied from) had something that she did not.

Let me know what you decide to do. I would love to pass it on, as the original ring holder was pretty upset, like you. I understand where you are coming from, especially if it is unique. It probably hurts more when it is family. I would bet they are the same size, FYI PP.

My friend wanted to replace the ring so she would not have the same as a person she didn't like so well.

Sorry to hear, OP. Some people are just jealous. Simple as that.

[Anonymous]

OP,
I'm not following. She asked, you said fine. Is there something else going on here?

[Anonymous]

I don't get your being upset over the ring or your husband's being upset over the diamond's being bigger. In the scheme of things, these are really superficial things. Try focusing on how wonderful your own marriage is, because honestly that's the most important thing here. And genuinely wish that your sister has a long and happy marriage as well.

[Anonymous]

It sounds to me that you are more upset that her ring is a nicer or at least a bigger version rendering yours somewhat not as nice or special in your eyes. Would you have felt the same if the stones were exactly the same size and your husband hadn't of made that comment?

[Anonymous]

My MIL had her ring reset to look like mine after DH and I got engaged. In fact, her first words after seeing my engagement ring were, "I want one like that". 6 months later she had one. The size of the stone was the same, but the setting of mine was different. Others have similar rings as well.

I think it's very strange that my MIL has a similar ring, and she never asked (though I'm not sure what I would have said if she had asked!).

While I can understand your feelings, maybe it would help you to remind yourself that your ring is truly unique because it represents your life with Dh. And you had it first.

[Anonymous]

So, you both have this ring?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our mother works for a big Jeweler...one of the perks is that each of your kids get a diamond ring at cost. DH and I picked out a diamond engagement ring from there when we got married. I love my ring.

My sister, who is close in age, asked me a year ago if I would mind if she got the same ring. I was shocked by the question....but said.....something to the effect of get whatever you like. So fast-forward a year, the newly engaged couple came over this weekend. My sister sporting the same engagement ring as I. I actually cried. (Not in front of her). I guess I should have told her...hell no...don't get the same ring as me. I really had no idea that it would have bothered me this much. I really don't know why you would choose to get the same ring as someone you knew...let alone your sister.

I love my husband, and love my kids. I love everything that the ring reminded me of. To me it was unique and special, and guess what I don't want to share it with anyone.
Now I look at it and I'm just reminded of the fact that my sister has the same ring.

Perhaps I need to just get over it.

There are only so many settings for a diamond and only so many metals. PP was right, tell her Best Wishes and give her a hug. You are pathetic. Did she have a white wedding gown? Maybe it was you mother's gown. I suppose you want her to use another color or not wear the same dress.