If you don’t have more than 2 children, why?
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Anonymous
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I am one of two and never wanted a third. I have a low tolerance of chaos and the more kids you have, the more chaotic life becomes.
As an aside, I have WASPy family members who believe only animals are meant to have over two kids and look down on people with large families. |
Anonymous
| Many miscarriages trying for #3 |
Anonymous
| I wanted three but didn’t think we could give three the things I’d like to give them (fully covered college, experiences like trips and extracurriculars). DH was also perfectly happy with two and after seeing people close to us have third kids with severe needs we decided why role the dice when we had two happy kids who get along well who we can comfortably afford. |
Anonymous
This for us as well. 2 kids 15 months apart is a lot of hands on work. |
Anonymous
| Because we didn’t want to have less time/attention for the 2 kids we already have, and because it’s very expensive having kids in this country. |
Anonymous
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Very expensive
Always an odd man out Immediately have to get another hotel room, bigger rental car, etc, can’t all fit in one row of the plane or split up 2x2 Just didn’t want a third |
Anonymous
| I didn't feel like I could be a good mom to more than two. There were other considerations (two on one sibling dynamics, cost, logistics, time in parent mode, etc.) but it really came down to that. |
Anonymous
| We were considering a third, but child #2 had health issues diagnosed at age 2 and we just never got to the point of trying. |
Anonymous
| Miscarriages. Secondary infertility. We tried for a third but didn’t work out |
Anonymous
| Got married at 38. Managed to have two kids after 40. I’d have been open to one or two more, but that was it for us. Maybe if I had married 10 years earlier I could have pulled it off. |
Anonymous
| I wanted two, got one. Something really bad happened. I wouldn't want three per finances, space and most importantly time. |
Anonymous
| Trouble TTC with my first two and by the time it would have been time to try for #3, if we had wanted to go for it, Covid was in full swing and it seemed really unwise. Also logistical concerns around the usual stuff like helping pay for college, needing larger cars, two hotel rooms, one of my kids has autism and needed therapies that were $$ and time consuming. |
Anonymous
| Are you the one who thinks we need to increase population? I didn't have more kids because I was too old and only wanted 2. |
Anonymous
| I don’t find childrearing fun and enjoy a lot of things that are more difficult with young kids like travel, skiing, entertaining. Basically I have a lot of interests and don’t need to keep having kids as a hobby. |
Anonymous
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Little to no family support
Cost of college Cost of childcare Cost of housing Having to work well into 60s to pay for everything Also just the impossible math of how you have enough money to pay for everything while also not working so much you don't even get to spend time with your kids Also the way additional kids can increase stress and thus lower quality of life for all involved |