Parents/ILs and never ending dinner plans

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I made reservations at Larlo’s pizza at 7. If you would like to ride with us we’re leaving at 6:30.

This. Tell them what you’re doing. They can join you or decline but they have a firm deadline to decide.

But don't restaurants get upset when you reserve for 6 and only 4 show up?

No, not in my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

o
You obviously don’t have kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

o
You obviously don’t have kids.

Of course I do. I have 3. But in an earlier thread when the MIL wanted to eat and the kids wanted to sleep all day everyone was like “chill! It’s vacation! Day care is hard. Don’t be so rigid.” And now it’s like “Give them exactly 5 minutes then just leave.” Typical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

Does the need to ear dinner come as such a surprise to you every day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

Does the need to ear dinner come as such a surprise to you every day?

No, which is why I'm baffled why people can't start this conversation more than 5 minutes before they need to leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

Does the need to ear dinner come as such a surprise to you every day?

It does for OP. Normal people decide a day or two in advance or however long in advance an reservation is required. The kids get hungry around 5. Every day. It’s no surprise so let’s make a reservation at XYZ at 5 for tomorrow. Or the next day. Is OP a brand new parent? It would be easy to just make the reservation then let everyone know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

Exactly. If two grown adults can't make a decision on a simple thing like dinner then yes, we're leaving without them. This does not require hours to decide. In or out. It's not that hard. My kids get the same thing. Make a decision in or out or you get to stay home-they're old enough to stay alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

Exactly. If two grown adults can't make a decision on a simple thing like dinner then yes, we're leaving without them. This does not require hours to decide. In or out. It's not that hard. My kids get the same thing. Make a decision in or out or you get to stay home-they're old enough to stay alone.

It doesn’t require hours but it also doesn’t need to be a 4 alarm fire that everything must be dropped right now because the children are suddenly hungry. It’s rather predictable that this event is going to happen hours in advance at about the same time every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I made reservations at Larlo’s pizza at 7. If you would like to ride with us we’re leaving at 6:30.

This. Tell them what you’re doing. They can join you or decline but they have a firm deadline to decide.

But don't restaurants get upset when you reserve for 6 and only 4 show up?

That’s what I meant about their having a firm deadline to decide. Let’s say the reservation is for 7:00. At 6:00, you’re either in or you’re out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

Does the need to ear dinner come as such a surprise to you every day?

It does for OP. Normal people decide a day or two in advance or however long in advance a reservation is required. The kids get hungry around 5. Every day. It’s no surprise so let’s make a reservation at XYZ at 5 for tomorrow. Or the next day. Is OP a brand new parent? It would be easy to just make the reservation then let everyone know.

Oh wait, then you’d say she was controlling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

Does the need to ear dinner come as such a surprise to you every day?

It does for OP. Normal people decide a day or two in advance or however long in advance a reservation is required. The kids get hungry around 5. Every day. It’s no surprise so let’s make a reservation at XYZ at 5 for tomorrow. Or the next day. Is OP a brand new parent? It would be easy to just make the reservation then let everyone know.

Oh wait, then you’d say she was controlling.

Well, in both cases it’s the mom’s way or the highway. If she wants to sleep in, that’s what happens. If she wants to set all the meal times, then that’s what she does. Sort of sounds controlling to me. Just own it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

Exactly. If two grown adults can't make a decision on a simple thing like dinner then yes, we're leaving without them. This does not require hours to decide. In or out. It's not that hard. My kids get the same thing. Make a decision in or out or you get to stay home-they're old enough to stay alone.

It doesn’t require hours but it also doesn’t need to be a 4 alarm fire that everything must be dropped right now because the children are suddenly hungry. It’s rather predictable that this event is going to happen hours in advance at about the same time every day.

That’s the point. OP is trying to get people to think through and plan ahead so they aren’t stuck at a restaurant with a 45 minute wait and ILs are shocked and grumbling, like mine do in a freaking beach town during high season

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought vacations were supposed to be leisurely and relaxing not adhering to a military schedule and demanding everyone hop to it.

This is how it works. Every moment of the day must be perfectly scheduled for the DCUMom's children. Their children must be catered to instantly when they need something. If an elderly person wants to eat at a certain time, they must be shunned as unreasonable or demanding, because otherwise the children might learn that they aren't the center of the universe. We can't have that happening.

Also, adults can't anticipate children's needs so that the elders can have time to consider their choices. The elders can have 5 minutes.

Exactly. If two grown adults can't make a decision on a simple thing like dinner then yes, we're leaving without them. This does not require hours to decide. In or out. It's not that hard. My kids get the same thing. Make a decision in or out or you get to stay home-they're old enough to stay alone.

It doesn’t require hours but it also doesn’t need to be a 4 alarm fire that everything must be dropped right now because the children are suddenly hungry. It’s rather predictable that this event is going to happen hours in advance at about the same time every day.

That’s the point. OP is trying to get people to think through and plan ahead so they aren’t stuck at a restaurant with a 45 minute wait and ILs are shocked and grumbling, like mine do in a freaking beach town during high season

No, she’s not. Because the kids are hungry now. The plan should have been made hours ago. But as the kids are hungry it’s like “hey let’s go to that place we drove by yesterday” when they clearly don’t have a reservation and have no idea what the wait will be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I made reservations at Larlo’s pizza at 7. If you would like to ride with us we’re leaving at 6:30.

This. Tell them what you’re doing. They can join you or decline but they have a firm deadline to decide.

But don't restaurants get upset when you reserve for 6 and only 4 show up?

How often are you going to the kind of restaurant that requires reservations with little kids? For those occasions, have the conversation in advance, maybe a few days before the thing, and make the reservation.

In popular vacations spots you need reservations at even kid friendly places, or at least to call ahead so you're not waiting an hour for a table.