What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
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Anonymous
Work the 12 steps and make living amends. |
Anonymous
That his temper and inability to talk things out wasn’t just a “guy thing” but a major major fault and issue. |
Anonymous
Same. Thought his lack of judgment and common sense was lack of life experiences. In reality it was untreated adhd/asd and he is uncoachable and cannot learn. Not lack of life experiences. |
Anonymous
Me too! Masking is a real thing |
Anonymous
| OCD. But I didn’t overlook it. I accepted it. |
Anonymous
| DW has serious anger issues that can get scary. She was bubbly and happy while dating and engagement. After kids she has completely changed. I think I may need to take the kids and leave. |
Anonymous
| I overlooked a very high ace score and thought he was somehow unscathed. I was very wrong. |
Anonymous
| Low frustration tolerance, temper flaring constantly over minor annoyances. Other classic inattentive ADHD symptoms. Not chivalrous at all. It’s so much worse after kids. I’m giving it 5 years and seeing how we do in couples therapy, but I don’t know if we’ll make it long term if the behaviors continue. |
Anonymous
Please tell me how. Dating somebody with ADHD now. |
Anonymous
| His propensity to check out other women including on our first date. Marriage full of disrespectful lecherous behavior and ultimately infidelity. |
Anonymous
| OP here. half of people are responding incorrectly to my question. I’m trying to understand red flags you overlooked, but still manage to be happily married. Everyone has something wrong with them, no one is perfect. |
Anonymous
You know it's treatable right? |
Anonymous
They're curious and good at talking to all sorts of people. But also can be messy and scattered. If they're on RX they'll just be interesting people who easily get along with your family because they can talk about anything. |
Anonymous
| Selfishness. We were young and I thought we would evolve and grow together, but no such luck. I was too optimistic and too willing to focus on what was good about the relationship, assuming it would win over the rest. It didn’t and the opposite happened, especially after we had a kid. |
Anonymous
| His crazy parents. They had been divorced multiple times. Cheaters. |