Vent: Invited to 4 child-free weddings this summer

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My sympathies. I can beat you! Dh and I are both in a wedding. Our kids are flower girls. And they aren’t invited to the wedding. Our baby isn’t invited at all. It’s insanity trying to figure this out. We basically have a series of babysitters working long hours. And the baby is headed hours away to grandparents. It kills me that they’re invited to the rehearsal but not the rehearsal dinner. Don’t they realize how impossible this is for parents? The reason they aren’t invited to the reception is cost and because everyone has kids, which I get. But our girls are pretty devastated at not getting to go. I sit then down before every meeting and forbid them from mentioning it at all. We aren’t local to the wedding.

I too had a childfree wedding but we also didn’t know any kids. Our flower girl did come.

That's crazy. I'd just say no.

FWIW, my DC was a ring bearer in a relative's wedding, and he went to the rehearsal dinner and was at the first couple of hours of the reception, and then we got a baby sitter for the last few hours for him and the flower girls so they could go to bed. But that was our choice.

Our DC's first outing when he was a baby was a friend's wedding. I mentioned something about finding a babysitter and she insisted we bring him. I didn't even get to see him much because my friends all wanted to hold him.

Some of my best memories from weddings are kids dancing and having fun. The people who gripe about kids "drawing attention" aren't worried about the kids being fussy or making noise, they're just narcissists.

[Anonymous]

People are entitled to have the kind of wedding they want, OP. Just decline, nbd.

[Anonymous]

I am fine with people having child free weddings. I also assume this means they’re fine with a higher no-RSVP rate for people who can’t manage a weekend away from kids. It’ll be fine if you RSVP no.

[Anonymous]

we are not planning a child free wedding but I expect that the parents will look after them and remove them if they are too destructive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My sympathies. I can beat you! Dh and I are both in a wedding. Our kids are flower girls. And they aren’t invited to the wedding. Our baby isn’t invited at all. It’s insanity trying to figure this out. We basically have a series of babysitters working long hours. And the baby is headed hours away to grandparents. It kills me that they’re invited to the rehearsal but not the rehearsal dinner. Don’t they realize how impossible this is for parents? The reason they aren’t invited to the reception is cost and because everyone has kids, which I get. But our girls are pretty devastated at not getting to go. I sit then down before every meeting and forbid them from mentioning it at all. We aren’t local to the wedding.

I too had a childfree wedding but we also didn’t know any kids. Our flower girl did come.

My spouse and I would not accommodate this. Just say no.

When a relative wanted to do this, we said our kids couldn’t be in the wedding party if they couldn’t come to the reception. It’s incredibly rude and selfish to use children for photo ops (with their parents footing the bill for their wedding attire) and then refuse to even feed them. Children are human beings, not props.

[Anonymous]

If I had an issue with this, I’d look at this the same way as I would if the wedding cost me $5k to attend, was in an inconvenient day/time or if I just didn’t want to. Just say no. Send a gift (or not).

I’d think that obviously I’m not that critical or my personal circumstance would have been considered. NBD.

[Anonymous]

It's fine not to attend.

It's fine to drop UT of a wedding party if you learn afterwards that your kids aren't welcome. You don't have to send a gift.

But it's not OK to be mad about it. That'll come through, and it's their wedding to manage however they want

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My sympathies. I can beat you! Dh and I are both in a wedding. Our kids are flower girls. And they aren’t invited to the wedding. Our baby isn’t invited at all. It’s insanity trying to figure this out. We basically have a series of babysitters working long hours. And the baby is headed hours away to grandparents. It kills me that they’re invited to the rehearsal but not the rehearsal dinner. Don’t they realize how impossible this is for parents? The reason they aren’t invited to the reception is cost and because everyone has kids, which I get. But our girls are pretty devastated at not getting to go. I sit then down before every meeting and forbid them from mentioning it at all. We aren’t local to the wedding.

I too had a childfree wedding but we also didn’t know any kids. Our flower girl did come.

So the couple get the cute shot of the flower girls walking down the aisle and then their services are no longer needed.

Your friends are terrible people.

[Anonymous]

I think more people are having child free weddings because parents aren’t parenting kids. Kids are wild and parents think it’s just so cute, but it’s not.

—parent and teacher

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My sympathies. I can beat you! Dh and I are both in a wedding. Our kids are flower girls. And they aren’t invited to the wedding. Our baby isn’t invited at all. It’s insanity trying to figure this out. We basically have a series of babysitters working long hours. And the baby is headed hours away to grandparents. It kills me that they’re invited to the rehearsal but not the rehearsal dinner. Don’t they realize how impossible this is for parents? The reason they aren’t invited to the reception is cost and because everyone has kids, which I get. But our girls are pretty devastated at not getting to go. I sit then down before every meeting and forbid them from mentioning it at all. We aren’t local to the wedding.

I too had a childfree wedding but we also didn’t know any kids. Our flower girl did come.

My spouse and I would not accommodate this. Just say no.

+1 unless the the event space provided childcare, I would’ve declined.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think more people are having child free weddings because parents aren’t parenting kids. Kids are wild and parents think it’s just so cute, but it’s not.

—parent and teacher

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think more people are having child free weddings because parents aren’t parenting kids. Kids are wild and parents think it’s just so cute, but it’s not.

—parent and teacher

+1

+2, when I saw the topic I came here to say that I can't blame them, who wants to walk down the aisle while someone's "blessing" is watching Paw Patrol on their iPad?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My sympathies. I can beat you! Dh and I are both in a wedding. Our kids are flower girls. And they aren’t invited to the wedding. Our baby isn’t invited at all. It’s insanity trying to figure this out. We basically have a series of babysitters working long hours. And the baby is headed hours away to grandparents. It kills me that they’re invited to the rehearsal but not the rehearsal dinner. Don’t they realize how impossible this is for parents? The reason they aren’t invited to the reception is cost and because everyone has kids, which I get. But our girls are pretty devastated at not getting to go. I sit then down before every meeting and forbid them from mentioning it at all. We aren’t local to the wedding.

I too had a childfree wedding but we also didn’t know any kids. Our flower girl did come.

Your kids are in the Church part but not invited to the reception? That’s downright bizarre. You win.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think more people are having child free weddings because parents aren’t parenting kids. Kids are wild and parents think it’s just so cute, but it’s not.

—parent and teacher

+1

+2, when I saw the topic I came here to say that I can't blame them, who wants to walk down the aisle while someone's "blessing" is watching Paw Patrol on their iPad?

Exactly

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think more people are having child free weddings because parents aren’t parenting kids. Kids are wild and parents think it’s just so cute, but it’s not.

—parent and teacher

+1

+2, when I saw the topic I came here to say that I can't blame them, who wants to walk down the aisle while someone's "blessing" is watching Paw Patrol on their iPad?

+3 Just decline if you don't want to go anywhere without your kids. We had a child free wedding becuase our venue was not really accomodating to kids. Kids don't need to go everywhere (and I have kids and a dog!)