Does life become amazing and easy once kids are off to college?

[Anonymous]

The day to day is easier, but I feel there is just as much stress and anxiety because issues are greater. Also, college kids are home a lot and sometimes resort to their childhood ways when they are home. Slightly more mature, but still same kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid leaving for college in the fall. I anticipate he will still need a close parental eye for at least the first semester (prone to anxiety, extreme introvert, some new self harming behaviors) to make sure he does not go off the rails and has the support he needs.

DH and I were going to take a LONG awaited solo vacation in Sept, but now feel like we need to stay relatively close 'just in case.'
(DS is going to school about 90m away.)

Kids transitioning to college can be rough in ways different from them living at home.

How on earth do you think you’re going to manage close supervision when he lives at college away from you and is now also a legal adult whose information and records you won’t be privy to?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid leaving for college in the fall. I anticipate he will still need a close parental eye for at least the first semester (prone to anxiety, extreme introvert, some new self harming behaviors) to make sure he does not go off the rails and has the support he needs.

DH and I were going to take a LONG awaited solo vacation in Sept, but now feel like we need to stay relatively close 'just in case.'
(DS is going to school about 90m away.)

Kids transitioning to college can be rough in ways different from them living at home.

How on earth do you think you’re going to manage close supervision when he lives at college away from you and is now also a legal adult whose information and records you won’t be privy to?

Smart parents get legal power of attorney for their young adult children. Most parents in my neighborhood have done this. (Not PP)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid leaving for college in the fall. I anticipate he will still need a close parental eye for at least the first semester (prone to anxiety, extreme introvert, some new self harming behaviors) to make sure he does not go off the rails and has the support he needs.

DH and I were going to take a LONG awaited solo vacation in Sept, but now feel like we need to stay relatively close 'just in case.'
(DS is going to school about 90m away.)

Kids transitioning to college can be rough in ways different from them living at home.

How on earth do you think you’re going to manage close supervision when he lives at college away from you and is now also a legal adult whose information and records you won’t be privy to?

I am not going to request his records, but he talks with us freely and we have open communication. I am anticipating him coming home regularly (though not my preference) to connect with his friends who are still in HS and the family dog who he adores - he will not have a car so he will need to coordinate transportation with us.

Also FWIW - he has been a "legal adult" for 9 months.

[Anonymous]

I can only imagine how much time back I will have!! First off to college this year- second in two years.

It’s just the meals and juggling family calendar and appointments and sports blah blah. I am hanging on by a thread in my real job.

Those before and after work hours are going to be so peaceful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid leaving for college in the fall. I anticipate he will still need a close parental eye for at least the first semester (prone to anxiety, extreme introvert, some new self harming behaviors) to make sure he does not go off the rails and has the support he needs.

DH and I were going to take a LONG awaited solo vacation in Sept, but now feel like we need to stay relatively close 'just in case.'
(DS is going to school about 90m away.)

Kids transitioning to college can be rough in ways different from them living at home.

How on earth do you think you’re going to manage close supervision when he lives at college away from you and is now also a legal adult whose information and records you won’t be privy to?

Smart parents get legal power of attorney for their young adult children. Most parents in my neighborhood have done this. (Not PP)

I would be surprised if parents are getting full legal power of attorney like you do with your elderly parent who is starting to have dementia, so you can sign enforceable contracts on their behalf.

It is common to have kids agree to a Medical Power of Attorney so that your parent can make medical decisions especially if there is an emergency medical situation.

[Anonymous]

I got full legal power of attorney. My kid was diagnosed with a serious mental illness so I got as much as I was able to. Thankfully he had a good freshman year at school. It helped that he was only 20 minutes away and I found excuses to check up on his every once in a while.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid leaving for college in the fall. I anticipate he will still need a close parental eye for at least the first semester (prone to anxiety, extreme introvert, some new self harming behaviors) to make sure he does not go off the rails and has the support he needs.

DH and I were going to take a LONG awaited solo vacation in Sept, but now feel like we need to stay relatively close 'just in case.'
(DS is going to school about 90m away.)

Kids transitioning to college can be rough in ways different from them living at home.

I’m in the same boat. It’s tough. But, different kids are different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can only imagine how much time back I will have!! First off to college this year- second in two years.

It’s just the meals and juggling family calendar and appointments and sports blah blah. I am hanging on by a thread in my real job.

Those before and after work hours are going to be so peaceful.

Yes, right now everything is drudgery. Clean, work, clean and cook, deal with issues of the day with teens, their moods if they are home, collapse in bed, repeat. It feels busier than younger years in a way, and more mentally exhausting.

[Anonymous]

Yes, it's great!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I need to know. Near the finish line with two rising seniors and stress levels are high.

No bigger kids bigger problems

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid leaving for college in the fall. I anticipate he will still need a close parental eye for at least the first semester (prone to anxiety, extreme introvert, some new self harming behaviors) to make sure he does not go off the rails and has the support he needs.

DH and I were going to take a LONG awaited solo vacation in Sept, but now feel like we need to stay relatively close 'just in case.'
(DS is going to school about 90m away.)

Kids transitioning to college can be rough in ways different from them living at home.

How on earth do you think you’re going to manage close supervision when he lives at college away from you and is now also a legal adult whose information and records you won’t be privy to?

Smart parents get legal power of attorney for their young adult children. Most parents in my neighborhood have done this. (Not PP)

I would be surprised if parents are getting full legal power of attorney like you do with your elderly parent who is starting to have dementia, so you can sign enforceable contracts on their behalf.

It is common to have kids agree to a Medical Power of Attorney so that your parent can make medical decisions especially if there is an emergency medical situation.

We are getting full. You never know when a crisis will occur. I'm paying the tuition bill - I'm having access.

[Anonymous]

Mama Bear Legal has all the legal forms you need (we required our kids to sign), just in case they have a medical issue while at college.

Yes, life is so much easier! You clean you house and it stays clean! Spouse travels for work and you want cereal for dinner, go for it! You and spouse want to go to Philly/NYC/wherever for a lot minute or spur of the moment anything? Go and enjoy!

They also mature while away, and are truly lovely people when home on break - but do t think they are home to visit you, they want to see all their friends who are also home. And the house will be a mess again, and they'll come home late and you'll be worried, and they may or may not eat dinner with you but they will eat the leftovers you intended to take for lunch when they get home and decide they are hungry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid leaving for college in the fall. I anticipate he will still need a close parental eye for at least the first semester (prone to anxiety, extreme introvert, some new self harming behaviors) to make sure he does not go off the rails and has the support he needs.

DH and I were going to take a LONG awaited solo vacation in Sept, but now feel like we need to stay relatively close 'just in case.'
(DS is going to school about 90m away.)

Kids transitioning to college can be rough in ways different from them living at home.

How on earth do you think you’re going to manage close supervision when he lives at college away from you and is now also a legal adult whose information and records you won’t be privy to?

Smart parents get legal power of attorney for their young adult children. Most parents in my neighborhood have done this. (Not PP)

I would be surprised if parents are getting full legal power of attorney like you do with your elderly parent who is starting to have dementia, so you can sign enforceable contracts on their behalf.

It is common to have kids agree to a Medical Power of Attorney so that your parent can make medical decisions especially if there is an emergency medical situation.

We are getting full. You never know when a crisis will occur. I'm paying the tuition bill - I'm having access.

Just curious for an example of a crisis that isn’t medical where you need to be able to bind your kid to a contract possibly without them even knowing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a kid leaving for college in the fall. I anticipate he will still need a close parental eye for at least the first semester (prone to anxiety, extreme introvert, some new self harming behaviors) to make sure he does not go off the rails and has the support he needs.

DH and I were going to take a LONG awaited solo vacation in Sept, but now feel like we need to stay relatively close 'just in case.'
(DS is going to school about 90m away.)

Kids transitioning to college can be rough in ways different from them living at home.

How on earth do you think you’re going to manage close supervision when he lives at college away from you and is now also a legal adult whose information and records you won’t be privy to?

Smart parents get legal power of attorney for their young adult children. Most parents in my neighborhood have done this. (Not PP)

I would be surprised if parents are getting full legal power of attorney like you do with your elderly parent who is starting to have dementia, so you can sign enforceable contracts on their behalf.

It is common to have kids agree to a Medical Power of Attorney so that your parent can make medical decisions especially if there is an emergency medical situation.

We are getting full. You never know when a crisis will occur. I'm paying the tuition bill - I'm having access.

Just curious for an example of a crisis that isn’t medical where you need to be able to bind your kid to a contract possibly without them even knowing.

That sounds awful. Somehow boomers went to college without their parents taking away their adult rights but gen whatever doesn’t get the same consideration? How many millennials had parents that did this? I’m an elder millennial and never heard of this in my peer group - even after Napster lawsuits lol. I’m fine with medical power of attorney but full??? Why