5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual

[Anonymous]

I remember growing up, eons ago, wearing green and yellow on Thursdays was forbidden.

[Anonymous]

If you haven’t already, make a formal report using the word bullying. This meets the definition provided by FCPS:

“ Any aggressive and unwanted behavior that is intended to harm, intimidate, or humiliate the victim; involves a real or perceived power imbalance between the aggressor or aggressors and victim; and is repeated over time or causes severe emotional trauma. “Bullying” includes cyberbullying. “Bullying” does not include ordinary teasing, horseplay, argument, or peer conflict.”

Once you make the report, they are required to investigate the allegation AND all allegations are required to be documented in their system. Within 5 days of your reporting it, all parties (including the other parents) must receive a notice:

“FCPS employees are required to report immediately to the principal or designee any instance of bullying the staff member becomes aware of or witnesses. When a bullying allegation is reported to school administration, the Students Rights and Responsibilities states, "The principal is responsible for investigating and documenting all allegations of bullying. All allegations (whether founded or not) of bullying, including supporting information, shall be recorded in the Bullying and Harassment Management System (BHMS). In connection with any allegation of bullying, and within five school days of the initial report of such to a school official, the principal shall furnish notice regarding the status of the investigation to the parent/guardian of each student allegedly involved."

https://www.fcps.edu/resources/student-safety-and-wellness/bullying-prevention-and-intervention

Your school has no incentive to help your child, but they do have incentive to keep their reported numbers low.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you haven’t already, make a formal report using the word bullying. This meets the definition provided by FCPS:

“ Any aggressive and unwanted behavior that is intended to harm, intimidate, or humiliate the victim; involves a real or perceived power imbalance between the aggressor or aggressors and victim; and is repeated over time or causes severe emotional trauma. “Bullying” includes cyberbullying. “Bullying” does not include ordinary teasing, horseplay, argument, or peer conflict.”

Once you make the report, they are required to investigate the allegation AND all allegations are required to be documented in their system. Within 5 days of your reporting it, all parties (including the other parents) must receive a notice:

“FCPS employees are required to report immediately to the principal or designee any instance of bullying the staff member becomes aware of or witnesses. When a bullying allegation is reported to school administration, the Students Rights and Responsibilities states, "The principal is responsible for investigating and documenting all allegations of bullying. All allegations (whether founded or not) of bullying, including supporting information, shall be recorded in the Bullying and Harassment Management System (BHMS). In connection with any allegation of bullying, and within five school days of the initial report of such to a school official, the principal shall furnish notice regarding the status of the investigation to the parent/guardian of each student allegedly involved."

https://www.fcps.edu/resources/student-safety-and-wellness/bullying-prevention-and-intervention

Your school has no incentive to help your child, but they do have incentive to keep their reported numbers low.

DP, but also a teacher. This example doesn't meet FCPS definition of bullying. It’s not been going on long enough and they’ll need more information on the “power imbalance”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you haven’t already, make a formal report using the word bullying. This meets the definition provided by FCPS:

“ Any aggressive and unwanted behavior that is intended to harm, intimidate, or humiliate the victim; involves a real or perceived power imbalance between the aggressor or aggressors and victim; and is repeated over time or causes severe emotional trauma. “Bullying” includes cyberbullying. “Bullying” does not include ordinary teasing, horseplay, argument, or peer conflict.”

Once you make the report, they are required to investigate the allegation AND all allegations are required to be documented in their system. Within 5 days of your reporting it, all parties (including the other parents) must receive a notice:

“FCPS employees are required to report immediately to the principal or designee any instance of bullying the staff member becomes aware of or witnesses. When a bullying allegation is reported to school administration, the Students Rights and Responsibilities states, "The principal is responsible for investigating and documenting all allegations of bullying. All allegations (whether founded or not) of bullying, including supporting information, shall be recorded in the Bullying and Harassment Management System (BHMS). In connection with any allegation of bullying, and within five school days of the initial report of such to a school official, the principal shall furnish notice regarding the status of the investigation to the parent/guardian of each student allegedly involved."

https://www.fcps.edu/resources/student-safety-and-wellness/bullying-prevention-and-intervention

Your school has no incentive to help your child, but they do have incentive to keep their reported numbers low.

PP adding on that I went back and reread your original post and it seems like it only happened one time. Bullying is repeated instances. Hopefully it stops since it was addressed but if it doesn’t please report it! Too many kids are made miserable by bullies and trust the schools too much.

[Anonymous]

Can you encourage him to find new friends? Even if you son changed ( clothes) these kids do not sound like someone I would want him to hang out with

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you haven’t already, make a formal report using the word bullying. This meets the definition provided by FCPS:

“ Any aggressive and unwanted behavior that is intended to harm, intimidate, or humiliate the victim; involves a real or perceived power imbalance between the aggressor or aggressors and victim; and is repeated over time or causes severe emotional trauma. “Bullying” includes cyberbullying. “Bullying” does not include ordinary teasing, horseplay, argument, or peer conflict.”

Once you make the report, they are required to investigate the allegation AND all allegations are required to be documented in their system. Within 5 days of your reporting it, all parties (including the other parents) must receive a notice:

“FCPS employees are required to report immediately to the principal or designee any instance of bullying the staff member becomes aware of or witnesses. When a bullying allegation is reported to school administration, the Students Rights and Responsibilities states, "The principal is responsible for investigating and documenting all allegations of bullying. All allegations (whether founded or not) of bullying, including supporting information, shall be recorded in the Bullying and Harassment Management System (BHMS). In connection with any allegation of bullying, and within five school days of the initial report of such to a school official, the principal shall furnish notice regarding the status of the investigation to the parent/guardian of each student allegedly involved."

https://www.fcps.edu/resources/student-safety-and-wellness/bullying-prevention-and-intervention

Your school has no incentive to help your child, but they do have incentive to keep their reported numbers low.

DP, but also a teacher. This example doesn't meet FCPS definition of bullying. It’s not been going on long enough and they’ll need more information on the “power imbalance”.

I posted about the frequency the same time. My bad. But I would say 2 against 1 is a power imbalance.

The important thing is that there has be to action taken on all allegations, not just all investigated and verified cases. That means there’s a formal way for parents to document cases so later the school can’t say they didn’t know. Be the squeaky wheel!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sad to say, but he might want to wear different clothes. I have a nephew who his fashionable mom has always dressed him like a little . . . sorry, gay man. Fitted pants rolled up at the ankles, loafer with no socks, bow ties and bowler hats. He was super cute, yes. And he loved the attention. But now, in school, all he was getting is a very negative kind of attention for how he dresses. His younger brother has always refused to dress like that as if sensing early on nothing good comes from it. Hoodies and running shoes for him. Older brother is morphing as well. But it's been painful.

My son wears jeans, sneakers, t-shirts and a turtleneck under the t-shirts in the winter, just like his friends. It has nothing to do with how he dresses.

This is bullying, but lose the jeans. No kids wear jeans anymore.

[Anonymous]

For starters. OP, say “gay.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sad to say, but he might want to wear different clothes. I have a nephew who his fashionable mom has always dressed him like a little . . . sorry, gay man. Fitted pants rolled up at the ankles, loafer with no socks, bow ties and bowler hats. He was super cute, yes. And he loved the attention. But now, in school, all he was getting is a very negative kind of attention for how he dresses. His younger brother has always refused to dress like that as if sensing early on nothing good comes from it. Hoodies and running shoes for him. Older brother is morphing as well. But it's been painful.

My son wears jeans, sneakers, t-shirts and a turtleneck under the t-shirts in the winter, just like his friends. It has nothing to do with how he dresses.

Where are 5th graders wearing turtlenecks? I have a 4th grader and most of the kids wear shorts and t shirts if it’s over 40. A sweatshirt if it’s under 40. Never pants u less it’s snowing and never jeans. Most only one coats for skiing. Are you in this area?
I do think it’s time for a major wardrobe overhaul plus getting new friends.

[Anonymous]

What do you wear instead of jeans??? Sweatpants?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sad to say, but he might want to wear different clothes. I have a nephew who his fashionable mom has always dressed him like a little . . . sorry, gay man. Fitted pants rolled up at the ankles, loafer with no socks, bow ties and bowler hats. He was super cute, yes. And he loved the attention. But now, in school, all he was getting is a very negative kind of attention for how he dresses. His younger brother has always refused to dress like that as if sensing early on nothing good comes from it. Hoodies and running shoes for him. Older brother is morphing as well. But it's been painful.

My son wears jeans, sneakers, t-shirts and a turtleneck under the t-shirts in the winter, just like his friends. It has nothing to do with how he dresses.

Where are 5th graders wearing turtlenecks? I have a 4th grader and most of the kids wear shorts and t shirts if it’s over 40. A sweatshirt if it’s under 40. Never pants u less it’s snowing and never jeans. Most only one coats for skiing. Are you in this area?
I do think it’s time for a major wardrobe overhaul plus getting new friends.

My fourth grader and most of his friends wear jeans and T-shirts.

Anyway the clothes aren’t the issue. If it wasn’t that they’d find something else. His hair color, eye color, accent, family composition, hobbies. Kids who want to tease and exude will do so. Changing to fit in won’t help because they’ll just seize on something else. Teach him to stand up for himself and tell them to knock it off. And to find better friends if they don’t. Some teasing is a phase and some is not. May be too early to tell which this is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you wear instead of jeans??? Sweatpants?

Athletic pants (like Under Armor or Nike) or joggers. My elementary boys don’t wear jeans and neither do their friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sad to say, but he might want to wear different clothes. I have a nephew who his fashionable mom has always dressed him like a little . . . sorry, gay man. Fitted pants rolled up at the ankles, loafer with no socks, bow ties and bowler hats. He was super cute, yes. And he loved the attention. But now, in school, all he was getting is a very negative kind of attention for how he dresses. His younger brother has always refused to dress like that as if sensing early on nothing good comes from it. Hoodies and running shoes for him. Older brother is morphing as well. But it's been painful.

My son wears jeans, sneakers, t-shirts and a turtleneck under the t-shirts in the winter, just like his friends. It has nothing to do with how he dresses.

This is bullying, but lose the jeans. No kids wear jeans anymore.

Um.. what? What do they wear?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you haven’t already, make a formal report using the word bullying. This meets the definition provided by FCPS:

“ Any aggressive and unwanted behavior that is intended to harm, intimidate, or humiliate the victim; involves a real or perceived power imbalance between the aggressor or aggressors and victim; and is repeated over time or causes severe emotional trauma. “Bullying” includes cyberbullying. “Bullying” does not include ordinary teasing, horseplay, argument, or peer conflict.”

Once you make the report, they are required to investigate the allegation AND all allegations are required to be documented in their system. Within 5 days of your reporting it, all parties (including the other parents) must receive a notice:

“FCPS employees are required to report immediately to the principal or designee any instance of bullying the staff member becomes aware of or witnesses. When a bullying allegation is reported to school administration, the Students Rights and Responsibilities states, "The principal is responsible for investigating and documenting all allegations of bullying. All allegations (whether founded or not) of bullying, including supporting information, shall be recorded in the Bullying and Harassment Management System (BHMS). In connection with any allegation of bullying, and within five school days of the initial report of such to a school official, the principal shall furnish notice regarding the status of the investigation to the parent/guardian of each student allegedly involved."

https://www.fcps.edu/resources/student-safety-and-wellness/bullying-prevention-and-intervention

Your school has no incentive to help your child, but they do have incentive to keep their reported numbers low.

Hold up - stop. The children saddled with the label “bully” will have that on the permanent record.

Do you really want to harm 2 innocent childrens for the rest of their life with this bully label??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you haven’t already, make a formal report using the word bullying. This meets the definition provided by FCPS:

“ Any aggressive and unwanted behavior that is intended to harm, intimidate, or humiliate the victim; involves a real or perceived power imbalance between the aggressor or aggressors and victim; and is repeated over time or causes severe emotional trauma. “Bullying” includes cyberbullying. “Bullying” does not include ordinary teasing, horseplay, argument, or peer conflict.”

Once you make the report, they are required to investigate the allegation AND all allegations are required to be documented in their system. Within 5 days of your reporting it, all parties (including the other parents) must receive a notice:

“FCPS employees are required to report immediately to the principal or designee any instance of bullying the staff member becomes aware of or witnesses. When a bullying allegation is reported to school administration, the Students Rights and Responsibilities states, "The principal is responsible for investigating and documenting all allegations of bullying. All allegations (whether founded or not) of bullying, including supporting information, shall be recorded in the Bullying and Harassment Management System (BHMS). In connection with any allegation of bullying, and within five school days of the initial report of such to a school official, the principal shall furnish notice regarding the status of the investigation to the parent/guardian of each student allegedly involved."

https://www.fcps.edu/resources/student-safety-and-wellness/bullying-prevention-and-intervention

Your school has no incentive to help your child, but they do have incentive to keep their reported numbers low.

Hold up - stop. The children saddled with the label “bully” will have that on the permanent record.

Do you really want to harm 2 innocent childrens for the rest of their life with this bully label??

If they’re bullying, they aren’t so innocent.