Was this tacky?

[Anonymous]

Don't go, OP. You know the food is going to be trash.

[Anonymous]

Maybe low-key trying to recruit you to her church -- which isn't necessarily a bad thing. Maybe you'll go and actually enjoy the people! If not, no biggie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't go, OP. You know the food is going to be trash.

The free coffee & donuts after mass today weren't anything special (I prefer a cappuccino and a croissant) but it was still nice to catch up with a few couples.

[Anonymous]

Not tacky. Proselytizing.
It feels tacky because you feel like you were targeted for shallow reasons. That's essentially how proselytizing works. Or maybe you can call it sneaky missionary work.
You can be classy and politely decline with profuse gratitude for being invited. Believe me, I'm sure your friend has been turned down many times in her efforts to bring in new members to her church so this will not be a surprise to her.

It does become hard to maintain a friendship afterwards though because you think maybe there are ulterior motives behind it all. But I encourage you to continue the friendship because your friend may have felt compelled to do this outreach duty by her church. She shouldn't lose friends because the church is pushy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not tacky. Proselytizing.
It feels tacky because you feel like you were targeted for shallow reasons. That's essentially how proselytizing works. Or maybe you can call it sneaky missionary work.
You can be classy and politely decline with profuse gratitude for being invited. Believe me, I'm sure your friend has been turned down many times in her efforts to bring in new members to her church so this will not be a surprise to her.

It does become hard to maintain a friendship afterwards though because you think maybe there are ulterior motives behind it all. But I encourage you to continue the friendship because your friend may have felt compelled to do this outreach duty by her church. She shouldn't lose friends because the church is pushy.

OP wasn’t bamboozeled, she accepted an invitation to a church event with zero hesitation until she found out it was a potluck lol.

If OP doesn’t want to attend church events, she should decline invites to church events.

[Anonymous]

Over-reacting. Just say you can’t make it work.

[Anonymous]

“Turns out I cant make it. Thanks for the invite though.”

[Anonymous]

Thank you but that date and time don’t work for us. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Frankly your response to this invitation is what is raising my eyebrows.

[Anonymous]

Not tacky no. Either go or don’t but stop overthinking it. It was a gesture made in kindness.

[Anonymous]

Its a super busy weekend for us so I can not add a potluck dish in. Thanks for thinking of us though..

[Anonymous]

What kind of church thinks it’s a good idea to recruit newfound members by compelling them to make a homecooked dish to share with complete strangers? I’m with OP on this one being tacky. The way to do it would be for the church to have this event be catered for with the members attending sharing the costs and have new recruits show up and just mingle with no stress about their food, other people’s food etc. The event is lame and nothing screams Lunar New Year about except for getting an Asian person to show up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't go, OP. You know the food is going to be trash.

The free coffee & donuts after mass today weren't anything special (I prefer a cappuccino and a croissant) but it was still nice to catch up with a few couples.

But if you're OP you only know one person and have already caught up with them so there's no sense for OP of it being "nice to catch up with a few couples."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't go, OP. You know the food is going to be trash.

The free coffee & donuts after mass today weren't anything special (I prefer a cappuccino and a croissant) but it was still nice to catch up with a few couples.

But if you're OP you only know one person and have already caught up with them so there's no sense for OP of it being "nice to catch up with a few couples."

OP's gripe seemed to be more-so the (low) food caliber and obligation to bring a dish, not the attendees.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't go, OP. You know the food is going to be trash.

The free coffee & donuts after mass today weren't anything special (I prefer a cappuccino and a croissant) but it was still nice to catch up with a few couples.

But if you're OP you only know one person and have already caught up with them so there's no sense for OP of it being "nice to catch up with a few couples."

This is OP and the ‘coffee and donuts’ comment wasn’t from me. As for some comments saying I was fine with the event until I found out it was potluck, I hadn’t committed or said yes to anything i.e. I would run it by the spouse.