50/50 split of assets with SAHM

Anonymous
Not sure what state but typically she would get 50% of assets and probably alimony for 8 or 9 years (half the length of your marriage). Plus child support, if there are children.

I am sure you have a different idea of what is “fair” but what I describe is the most likely outcome, unless you are in Virginia, she had an affair and you can prove that in court. Know you are at risk to have to pay her legal costs too if you go contentious.

If you get to 20 years of marriage you are at risk to have to pay lifetime alimony.
Anonymous
This is why if you decide to be a SAHP, you need to have your own assets or make sure you’re protected in a divorce. If you can’t get that, you have to make different choices about spending and earning.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Absolutely.

Half the assets, but no alimony.


In many states, a marriage of 20 years means lifetime alimony is likely.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Do you think this is fair in cases where the husband made all the money and the wife stayed home with the kids? Net worth of around 10 million, 3 kids who are grown or teens, 20 year marriage.

Wife is fighting for a 50% split plus alimony. Hasn’t worked in over 17 years.

She’s not getting alimony but I don’t think she should get 50% of the money. Maybe 10-20% so she is not destitute but even that is generous.


Wow just reading this we know why she is leaving you.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Absolutely.

Half the assets, but no alimony.


+1
She supported her husband's career allowing him to make the money. She worked to provide stable home and probably social life. 50/50 is fair. No alimony though, sounds reasonable.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Not sure what state but typically she would get 50% of assets and probably alimony for 8 or 9 years (half the length of your marriage). Plus child support, if there are children.

I am sure you have a different idea of what is “fair” but what I describe is the most likely outcome, unless you are in Virginia, she had an affair and you can prove that in court. Know you are at risk to have to pay her legal costs too if you go contentious.

If you get to 20 years of marriage you are at risk to have to pay lifetime alimony.


We’re in NY which is not a community property state. I hope to keep her distribution under 30%
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Absolutely.

Half the assets, but no alimony.


I’d rather pay alimony - 5k a month or something - than give her 5 million dollars!!!!

She did nothing to earn this money.


She cared for your children and household, enabling you to earn the money. The money is a marital asset. You best come to terms with the fact she will get half. Fighting it would be expensive and probably fruitless.

Exception is if she cheated on you and you live in Virginia and you can prove it in court.
Anonymous
Why are people acting like alimony is the issue here when it’s 5 million at stake that he doesn’t want to give her?

If someone gave me 5 million, I’d be set for life. I’d invest in safe bonds and stocks and live off the interest.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Not sure what state but typically she would get 50% of assets and probably alimony for 8 or 9 years (half the length of your marriage). Plus child support, if there are children.

I am sure you have a different idea of what is “fair” but what I describe is the most likely outcome, unless you are in Virginia, she had an affair and you can prove that in court. Know you are at risk to have to pay her legal costs too if you go contentious.

If you get to 20 years of marriage you are at risk to have to pay lifetime alimony.


We’re in NY which is not a community property state. I hope to keep her distribution under 30%


I hope you get destroyed in court and your ex laughs the whole way to the bank.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Absolutely.

Half the assets, but no alimony.


I’d rather pay alimony - 5k a month or something - than give her 5 million dollars!!!!

She did nothing to earn this money.[/quote

Chances are he didn't do much either.

How much is appreciation? That's just time -- and she did the same time with him, probably in misery.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Absolutely.

Half the assets, but no alimony.


I’d rather pay alimony - 5k a month or something - than give her 5 million dollars!!!!

She did nothing to earn this money.


BS she took care of the kids and home so he could rise in his career. Without her he would have had to take the kids to school, activities, do all the shopping, cooking, organize house work, gardening, gifts, holidays, etc, etc. Could he have had such a career doing all that - no.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Absolutely.

Half the assets, but no alimony.


I’d rather pay alimony - 5k a month or something - than give her 5 million dollars!!!!

She did nothing to earn this money.


Lol. Of course she did. Add up what it would have cost to pay for 24/7 childcare plus all the other services she provided. Don’t forget to include the cost of 3 surrogate pregnancies.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Absolutely.

Half the assets, but no alimony.


I’d rather pay alimony - 5k a month or something - than give her 5 million dollars!!!!

She did nothing to earn this money.


BS she took care of the kids and home so he could rise in his career. Without her he would have had to take the kids to school, activities, do all the shopping, cooking, organize house work, gardening, gifts, holidays, etc, etc. Could he have had such a career doing all that - no.


How do you know? Not every SAHM is a “good” one. OP clearly hates her for a reason.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Absolutely.

Half the assets, but no alimony.


I’d rather pay alimony - 5k a month or something - than give her 5 million dollars!!!!

She did nothing to earn this money.[/quote



Chances are he didn't do much either.

How much is appreciation? That's just time -- and she did the same time with him, probably in misery.
Anonymous
I know an ex-colleague from my Biglaw partner days who lived in Virginia. He divorced his SAH wife after 15 years or so and they had three kids. The oldest was in middle school. He told me she got half the assets and he was ordered beyond that to pay her a minimum of half his earnings or $500k a year in alimony / child support until the kids were 18 - whichever was HIGHER. Meaning he was basically handcuffed to Biglaw until the kids grew up.

This is Virginia.

So count yourself lucky OP.
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