rising 6th grader asking to visit colleges

[Anonymous]

Tell her she's too young for a tour from the admissions office, but there's no reason you can't go to walk around, attend a sporting event or performance, or sign her up for a summer camp or sports clinic that uses the campus.

[Anonymous]

I’m the poster who sees value in kids being around campuses. But, it is entirely different is you have an anxious, perfectionist kid that only wants to go to Harvard (aka Rory Gilmore). In this case, I think you have to balance other things — which may actually be attending a sports event, play, festival, etc at a number of schools to get this kid off the “Harvard or bust” mentality.

[Anonymous]

Can't you just drive through, get lunch, and buy her a hoodie at the bookstore?

[Anonymous]

What's the big deal? Go visit the school.

My DH visited Stanford around that age and decided that was the school for him. He applied to two schools and got in. Gave him something to strive for. But still, this doesn't have to be that deep or a big deal. Go, visit, discuss, move on.

[Anonymous]

Just say "its too early to think about college" and be done. Not sure why this is a huge parenting challenge?

[Anonymous]

Ok, you all have given me some things to think about. Maybe we'll cruise by and get her a t-shirt in the bookstore or something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just say "its too early to think about college" and be done. Not sure why this is a huge parenting challenge?

I'm not with other people, especially kids, and I really want to do right by her.

[Anonymous]

If you do a college tour - also do a tour of a less competitive school.

From an early point in time - there needs to be balance in the messaging.

[Anonymous]

If she wants to take a tour of Harvard, or the like, no. Unless there is something specific she wants to see like a cool botanical garden or library

[Anonymous]

OP, any chance you'll share the school? This is school dependent in my opinion. She wants to visit Harvard and you're happy to go to Boston? Sure, spend a day in Cambridge (and in this case, add on another school or two - MIT, Tufts, BC, etc.) She wants to visit Cornell? If you're happy spending times in the Finger Lakes, than sure. But, if it's a place far away from anywhere you'd go otherwise then no. Make it breezy. And I wouldn't worry too much about her fixating on a school. Things will likely change over the years, and if they don't, you can start helping her expand her mindset later down the line.

[Anonymous]

If the college was a part of the trip, I would drive through and maybe stop by a bookstore. I would not plan my vacation around going to a specific college.

Ask her what she likes about that college and then challenge her to find a similar college that is in your route and visit there. It's a good way to prep her to being open to a lot of options when the time to really need college visits and completing applications comes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, any chance you'll share the school? This is school dependent in my opinion. She wants to visit Harvard and you're happy to go to Boston? Sure, spend a day in Cambridge (and in this case, add on another school or two - MIT, Tufts, BC, etc.) She wants to visit Cornell? If you're happy spending times in the Finger Lakes, than sure. But, if it's a place far away from anywhere you'd go otherwise then no. Make it breezy. And I wouldn't worry too much about her fixating on a school. Things will likely change over the years, and if they don't, you can start helping her expand her mindset later down the line.

Air Force Academy. Definitely not opposed to visiting Colorado Springs (we're outdoorsy), but I admit we've never considered vacationing there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, any chance you'll share the school? This is school dependent in my opinion. She wants to visit Harvard and you're happy to go to Boston? Sure, spend a day in Cambridge (and in this case, add on another school or two - MIT, Tufts, BC, etc.) She wants to visit Cornell? If you're happy spending times in the Finger Lakes, than sure. But, if it's a place far away from anywhere you'd go otherwise then no. Make it breezy. And I wouldn't worry too much about her fixating on a school. Things will likely change over the years, and if they don't, you can start helping her expand her mindset later down the line.

Air Force Academy. Definitely not opposed to visiting Colorado Springs (we're outdoorsy), but I admit we've never considered vacationing there.

That is interesting. I do think there might be some value to exploring early what a military academy really looks like and feels like. But, I would not fly a 6th grader to Colorado solely for this purpose. I would be like “let’s go visit the naval academy first.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, any chance you'll share the school? This is school dependent in my opinion. She wants to visit Harvard and you're happy to go to Boston? Sure, spend a day in Cambridge (and in this case, add on another school or two - MIT, Tufts, BC, etc.) She wants to visit Cornell? If you're happy spending times in the Finger Lakes, than sure. But, if it's a place far away from anywhere you'd go otherwise then no. Make it breezy. And I wouldn't worry too much about her fixating on a school. Things will likely change over the years, and if they don't, you can start helping her expand her mindset later down the line.

Air Force Academy. Definitely not opposed to visiting Colorado Springs (we're outdoorsy), but I admit we've never considered vacationing there.

This is funny, we actually toured the Air Force Academy when I was a rising sixth grader. It's pretty neat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, any chance you'll share the school? This is school dependent in my opinion. She wants to visit Harvard and you're happy to go to Boston? Sure, spend a day in Cambridge (and in this case, add on another school or two - MIT, Tufts, BC, etc.) She wants to visit Cornell? If you're happy spending times in the Finger Lakes, than sure. But, if it's a place far away from anywhere you'd go otherwise then no. Make it breezy. And I wouldn't worry too much about her fixating on a school. Things will likely change over the years, and if they don't, you can start helping her expand her mindset later down the line.

Air Force Academy. Definitely not opposed to visiting Colorado Springs (we're outdoorsy), but I admit we've never considered vacationing there.

This is funny, we actually toured the Air Force Academy when I was a rising sixth grader. It's pretty neat.

^^ To add, we did it as a part of a cross country trip that included a lot of National Parks in the Southwest. Colorado Springs had a lot to do between Pike's Peak and Valley of the Gods. I think there was a hot spring nearby too. It was a really great trip.