is it still considered polite/routine to give a tour of your house when guests come?

[Anonymous]

My parents used to do this, but they had just built their dream, custom home. For regular homes, I'd think it weird.

[Anonymous]

Great question, OP. It seems like the pendulum has swung the other way on this one. I grew up in the South, and it absolutely was a thing back then. Now it's the other way. I would never expect a tour these days.

I would only offer if I just did a reno or it was a good friend and I'm showing them the home I just bought. We just moved and I showed a friend the whole house. But we had a play date and I didn't show the other parent the whole home because we don't know each other that well yet.

[Anonymous]

Unless you live in Pemberley Manor, do not do this.

[Anonymous]

I don’t, but I realize that people like these. (Except for me - I find them boring but I know people like showing off their houses.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unless you live in Pemberley Manor, do not do this.

But if you do take a tour, make sure to get super embarrassed when Mr. Darcy arrives home unexpectedly

[Anonymous]

I dislike having people upstairs and get really uncomfortable when people ask for a tour. Thankfully it's only happened a few times.

I want to host a fall party. The last time I hosted a bigger get together was pre covid and all the kids coming were babies so easy to keep everyone in the first floor ("upstairs not really baby proof.")

What is a polite way to keep people on the main floor? They can go up if there's a huge demand for a bathroom at the same time but don't really want people in the bedrooms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I dislike having people upstairs and get really uncomfortable when people ask for a tour. Thankfully it's only happened a few times.

I want to host a fall party. The last time I hosted a bigger get together was pre covid and all the kids coming were babies so easy to keep everyone in the first floor ("upstairs not really baby proof.")

What is a polite way to keep people on the main floor? They can go up if there's a huge demand for a bathroom at the same time but don't really want people in the bedrooms.

Agree. People have absolutely no business in your private living spaces. I have seen rude people ask for a tour, I have seen rude people make excuses to use the master bathroom, and I have even seen rude people ask to see someone's closet. None of these people were particularly close to the host, they were just rude. Just be aware that those people do exist. Maybe place a baby gate with a small sign - "please stay downstairs"? Not sure how to handle these types, when you were raised differently!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I dislike having people upstairs and get really uncomfortable when people ask for a tour. Thankfully it's only happened a few times.

I want to host a fall party. The last time I hosted a bigger get together was pre covid and all the kids coming were babies so easy to keep everyone in the first floor ("upstairs not really baby proof.")

What is a polite way to keep people on the main floor? They can go up if there's a huge demand for a bathroom at the same time but don't really want people in the bedrooms.

Tie some ribbon or rope around the entrance to the upstairs or put a chair in front of the stairs. That's a clear sign. But people shouldn't go upstairs unless invited.

[Anonymous]

We only showed family, and only when we first moved in.

[Anonymous]

I gave full tours of my house when we had just moved in and friends came over to visit. I no longer give full tours after living here for 15 years. New friends just see the public spaces of the house and the bathroom with out a tour.

[Anonymous]

I don't want a tour of anyone's home and I definitely don't want anyone expecting a tour of mine.

I'm from England and my MIL tried doing this and I was like "no thanks, I'm not nosy in that way". I would understand the impulse if you lived in a stately home and it was of genuine historic interest, but just some standard brick house built in the 1970s like every other house on the street? No thanks.

[Anonymous]

Where were you all raised? It’s just common decency and proper manners to offer a tour.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where were you all raised? It’s just common decency and proper manners to offer a tour.

Why?

Can you give me a good reason why people need to see my entire house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where were you all raised? It’s just common decency and proper manners to offer a tour.

Where were you raised that this would be normal? I was raised in various unimpressive houses where offering a tour would have come off like a funny joke. My husband was raised in large, impressive house with lots of interesting historic features—and a mother who’s big on manners—and no way would anyone in that house have ever proposed a tour. There are rooms in their house specifically for entertaining guests. Asking to see the rest would be gauche.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Close family first time at your house yes...otherwise just the main floor.

This.