Advice on dealing with bigoted "jokes"

[Anonymous]

In the long-run, find new friends. Avoid, avoid, avoid.

In the short-term, a calm you’re being racist (no it’s not racist but agree with other poster) or can say anti-semitic. I do think when they call each other out enough of them get it that they stop.

[Anonymous]

Same PP. He can also let a couple of his good friends know it’s bothering him and at a minimum they probably will no longer laugh and ideally might speak up.

The joking kid needs to feel uncomfortable. I’ve seen peers do this to a kid.

[Anonymous]

“Why are you so obsessed with my religion?”
And the “Racist much?” suggestion.

My very mellow, non-confrontational kid is mixed race and has had more than his share of “friendly” bigoted comments from one kid in particular. “Why are you so obsessed with me?” and “Racist much?” actually worked pretty well for shutting the other kid up.

[Anonymous]

To anyone reading this, please don’t assume it is not your child. Look at their phones.

I am amazed the number of kids saying this kind of stuff and then further putting it in writing and the parents are clueless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To anyone reading this, please don’t assume it is not your child. Look at their phones.

I am amazed the number of kids saying this kind of stuff and then further putting it in writing and the parents are clueless.

Of course it's not a good look to be saying or writing anti-Semitic or racist things. But let's not go all woke and canceling kids just trying out forms of humor. Let's also not forget that certain sterotypes or slurs have nuggets of truth to them. Kids recognize those nuggets when grownups outwoking themselves dont' wnat to.

My kid's best friend on his travel team wsa getting hassled because he made some anti-gay jokes making fun of a gay kid in his class. A couple were hilarious and just locker room humor but in this day and age he shouldn't have siad those things, should have let them go. But I've seen this kid when I've chaperoned field trips, and he is a little b**** and deserves to get knocked down a couple of pegs.

I was so proud of my boy who went and showed screenshot PROOF to the school that the kid getting "slurs" called on him was in fact was harassing people online about the clothes they wear and how they don't match girl. Instead of he said whoever said, my boy showed the only documented evidence which was the stuff the gay kid wrote. Without my son his buddy gets canceled. Instead everyone gets let off with a warning, and life goes on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To anyone reading this, please don’t assume it is not your child. Look at their phones.

I am amazed the number of kids saying this kind of stuff and then further putting it in writing and the parents are clueless.

Of course it's not a good look to be saying or writing anti-Semitic or racist things. But let's not go all woke and canceling kids just trying out forms of humor. Let's also not forget that certain sterotypes or slurs have nuggets of truth to them. Kids recognize those nuggets when grownups outwoking themselves dont' wnat to.

My kid's best friend on his travel team wsa getting hassled because he made some anti-gay jokes making fun of a gay kid in his class. A couple were hilarious and just locker room humor but in this day and age he shouldn't have siad those things, should have let them go. But I've seen this kid when I've chaperoned field trips, and he is a little b**** and deserves to get knocked down a couple of pegs.

I was so proud of my boy who went and showed screenshot PROOF to the school that the kid getting "slurs" called on him was in fact was harassing people online about the clothes they wear and how they don't match girl. Instead of he said whoever said, my boy showed the only documented evidence which was the stuff the gay kid wrote. Without my son his buddy gets canceled. Instead everyone gets let off with a warning, and life goes on.

And then there's this parent...

OP, I would never advocate a child get "cancelled" and often reporting it to the school does nothing (see parent above) so a very short, quick response and then ignore, ignore, ignore would be the best policy in the long run.

Good luck

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To anyone reading this, please don’t assume it is not your child. Look at their phones.

I am amazed the number of kids saying this kind of stuff and then further putting it in writing and the parents are clueless.

Of course it's not a good look to be saying or writing anti-Semitic or racist things. But let's not go all woke and canceling kids just trying out forms of humor. Let's also not forget that certain sterotypes or slurs have nuggets of truth to them. Kids recognize those nuggets when grownups outwoking themselves dont' wnat to.

My kid's best friend on his travel team wsa getting hassled because he made some anti-gay jokes making fun of a gay kid in his class. A couple were hilarious and just locker room humor but in this day and age he shouldn't have siad those things, should have let them go. But I've seen this kid when I've chaperoned field trips, and he is a little b**** and deserves to get knocked down a couple of pegs.

I was so proud of my boy who went and showed screenshot PROOF to the school that the kid getting "slurs" called on him was in fact was harassing people online about the clothes they wear and how they don't match girl. Instead of he said whoever said, my boy showed the only documented evidence which was the stuff the gay kid wrote. Without my son his buddy gets canceled. Instead everyone gets let off with a warning, and life goes on.

What the actual hell is this response? What is wrong with you? Don't try out forms of humor using people's race and sexuality. The jokes are not hilarious. Ever. They are not "slurs". They are slurs.

If the gay boy is a jerk and in the wrong, deal with that and say something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To anyone reading this, please don’t assume it is not your child. Look at their phones.

I am amazed the number of kids saying this kind of stuff and then further putting it in writing and the parents are clueless.

Of course it's not a good look to be saying or writing anti-Semitic or racist things. But let's not go all woke and canceling kids just trying out forms of humor. Let's also not forget that certain sterotypes or slurs have nuggets of truth to them. Kids recognize those nuggets when grownups outwoking themselves dont' wnat to.

My kid's best friend on his travel team wsa getting hassled because he made some anti-gay jokes making fun of a gay kid in his class. A couple were hilarious and just locker room humor but in this day and age he shouldn't have siad those things, should have let them go. But I've seen this kid when I've chaperoned field trips, and he is a little b**** and deserves to get knocked down a couple of pegs.

I was so proud of my boy who went and showed screenshot PROOF to the school that the kid getting "slurs" called on him was in fact was harassing people online about the clothes they wear and how they don't match girl. Instead of he said whoever said, my boy showed the only documented evidence which was the stuff the gay kid wrote. Without my son his buddy gets canceled. Instead everyone gets let off with a warning, and life goes on.

What the actual hell is this response? What is wrong with you? Don't try out forms of humor using people's race and sexuality. The jokes are not hilarious. Ever. They are not "slurs". They are slurs.

If the gay boy is a jerk and in the wrong, deal with that and say something.

Since you seem like a complete tool, let's also point out don't make jokes about people's religion or ethnicity either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Tell your son to ask the little b*stard to repeat the joke for him and have him pull out his phone and video him. Every time. And pan to get a shot of the kids laughing along.

That's one way to get beaten up and get your phone smashed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Tell your son to ask the little b*stard to repeat the joke for him and have him pull out his phone and video him. Every time. And pan to get a shot of the kids laughing along.

That's one way to get beaten up and get your phone smashed

And any cop can tell you that video ain't making it to the cloud if the phone gets smashed first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To anyone reading this, please don’t assume it is not your child. Look at their phones.

I am amazed the number of kids saying this kind of stuff and then further putting it in writing and the parents are clueless.

Of course it's not a good look to be saying or writing anti-Semitic or racist things. But let's not go all woke and canceling kids just trying out forms of humor. Let's also not forget that certain sterotypes or slurs have nuggets of truth to them. Kids recognize those nuggets when grownups outwoking themselves dont' wnat to.

My kid's best friend on his travel team wsa getting hassled because he made some anti-gay jokes making fun of a gay kid in his class. A couple were hilarious and just locker room humor but in this day and age he shouldn't have siad those things, should have let them go. But I've seen this kid when I've chaperoned field trips, and he is a little b**** and deserves to get knocked down a couple of pegs.

I was so proud of my boy who went and showed screenshot PROOF to the school that the kid getting "slurs" called on him was in fact was harassing people online about the clothes they wear and how they don't match girl. Instead of he said whoever said, my boy showed the only documented evidence which was the stuff the gay kid wrote. Without my son his buddy gets canceled. Instead everyone gets let off with a warning, and life goes on.

Did it occur to you PP that the reason the gay boy is "a little b****" (side note: this is a homophobic slur and you are very clearly homophobic) is as a proactive defense mechanism because the kid has been bullied for being gay by jerks like your son's "buddy"?

Not saying the gay kid is in the right or shouldn't be held accountable. He should. Just want to maybe get your tiny little brain turning to contemplate things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To anyone reading this, please don’t assume it is not your child. Look at their phones.

I am amazed the number of kids saying this kind of stuff and then further putting it in writing and the parents are clueless.

Of course it's not a good look to be saying or writing anti-Semitic or racist things. But let's not go all woke and canceling kids just trying out forms of humor. Let's also not forget that certain sterotypes or slurs have nuggets of truth to them. Kids recognize those nuggets when grownups outwoking themselves dont' wnat to.

My kid's best friend on his travel team wsa getting hassled because he made some anti-gay jokes making fun of a gay kid in his class. A couple were hilarious and just locker room humor but in this day and age he shouldn't have siad those things, should have let them go. But I've seen this kid when I've chaperoned field trips, and he is a little b**** and deserves to get knocked down a couple of pegs.

I was so proud of my boy who went and showed screenshot PROOF to the school that the kid getting "slurs" called on him was in fact was harassing people online about the clothes they wear and how they don't match girl. Instead of he said whoever said, my boy showed the only documented evidence which was the stuff the gay kid wrote. Without my son his buddy gets canceled. Instead everyone gets let off with a warning, and life goes on.

Did it occur to you PP that the reason the gay boy is "a little b****" (side note: this is a homophobic slur and you are very clearly homophobic) is as a proactive defense mechanism because the kid has been bullied for being gay by jerks like your son's "buddy"?

Not saying the gay kid is in the right or shouldn't be held accountable. He should. Just want to maybe get your tiny little brain turning to contemplate things.

+1

[Anonymous]

OP here. Well this thread escalated quickly. My child is not planning to do anything for now. We are not either, except we may find a way to broach the general topic with administration if a convenient time arises. I suggested to my child that he respond with a sarcastic "Hilarious. I did NAZI that coming" next time it happens. But nobody seemed to like my joke as much as I did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Well this thread escalated quickly. My child is not planning to do anything for now. We are not either, except we may find a way to broach the general topic with administration if a convenient time arises. I suggested to my child that he respond with a sarcastic "Hilarious. I did NAZI that coming" next time it happens. But nobody seemed to like my joke as much as I did.

I think tha joke only works in writing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Well this thread escalated quickly. My child is not planning to do anything for now. We are not either, except we may find a way to broach the general topic with administration if a convenient time arises. I suggested to my child that he respond with a sarcastic "Hilarious. I did NAZI that coming" next time it happens. But nobody seemed to like my joke as much as I did.

I think tha joke only works in writing.

And responding to a joke with a joke makes light of the original offensive joke. Better to call it out and state clearly that you don't appreciate it.