Falling asleep/co sleeping with 6.5 year old

[Anonymous]

I used to lay with mine for about 10 min each until mine were 9/10. Would read first and then snuggle some. Miss those days.

[Anonymous]

Totally normal. I do this with my almost 8 year old daughter. We did it with my son until he turned 10. If it doesn’t bother you, no issue. If you think it’s disrupts your life then you need to change the habit.

[Anonymous]

I'd do a modified sleep lady shuffle, or whatever it's called:

sit on a chair next to her bed and read your kindle until she falls asleep - this might take 2 weeks for her to feel comfortable having you in a chair, not snuggled in her bed. OR it might not take too long.

When she's comfortable with that, move your chair 2 ft closer to the door. Then 3 days later, move your chair 2 ft closer to the door again. And keep doing that every 2 to 3 days until you are sitting in the doorway. Then you are sitting outside the room (barely over the threshhold). Then 2 or 3 days later you are a few feet down the fall and by then she should be able to fall asleep without you in the room.

You NEVER leave her before she's asleep, you follow the same method as you do now: you stay in the room reading your kindle until she is fully out. But you are moving your chair so you are gradually extinguishing the need for you to be so close

And you do the chair moves every 2 or 3 days so that she DOESN'T get comfortable with your chair 2 ft away and then she needs to be upset and start all over when you move it another 2 ft away. You keep pushing the envelope by moving the chair every 2 or 3 days.


This will get you out of the room (depending on how large your daughter's bedroom is) in about 4 to 6 weeks.

WHEHTER YOU DO THIS OR NOT, you must start leaving her and moving to the far ends of the house while she is awake. Some children when they move to a new house start wanting parents to be in the same floor as they are, because it's such a large house. By now she should be comfortable having you on the 2nd floor if she's on the 1st, and vice versa. If that's NOT true, you need to get her used to that first.

Now, I hear you on the "I have so much to do" - could you do that while she's awake? That is, she plays quietly by herself (she is 61/2!) for 1.5 hours after dinner and before bed while you get the dishes done, laundry in, tomorrow's lunches packed, and whatever else stuff you need to do? (if it's work stuff that requires more concentration, that might not work)

that way when you leave her room you have no more work of your own to do, you can go watch tv or just go to your room and go to bed.

[Anonymous]

I was so opposed to co sleeping when DD was born. I got so many doom and gloom messages from people that seemed to also have the strange and desperate need to always have their DH/DW home next to them in bed - like if their spouse was travelling, it was the end of the world that they couldn’t sleep with them because it was so loooonely. It seemed so strange to me that it was fine that their child, who was still learning about the world, had to sleep alone even if sick and scared, but these grown people were losing their stuff over a night or two alone.

I also found out that many of our friends from other cultures happily coslept, and it took a lot of shame and mystery away for me.

Kids don’t go to college sleeping with their parents. Some kids happily sleep alone at 2 weeks, some, well… it’s a lot longer. But well adjusted families do cosleep, they just don’t tell you.

Do what’s right for your family.

[Anonymous]

My almost 6 year old sleeps on the floor of my room. Toddler brother had a habit of midnight singing. I’ve left it alone.

I coslept with toddler when he refused the bassinet until maybe 3-4 months or so. He was my third and I couldn’t afford to lose it from lack of sleep especially in 2020. Best postpartum period by far. And he grew out of the need for it fast.

[Anonymous]

I worked really hard on Establishing Good Sleeping Habits with my older kids, and with the youngest, I just . . . didn't. I used to snuggle with him until he was asleep, and then one night he said he wanted to try falling asleep while I sat in the comfy chair next to him.

And after a while, he asked me to leave because he wanted to try falling asleep on his own.

In among the nights when I stayed with him, there were nights that I would say, "I have to go start some laundry/finish cleaning up from dinner/fill out those permission slips, but I'll be back in a little bit"

You're right, they're only little for a short time. Get the snuggling while you can!

[Anonymous]

Our 7 yo sleeps with us or in a sleeping bag in our room. Some kids need the closeness. She always falls asleep in our room but would lie awake for hours in her own. I do usually transfer her to her room or the floor bed when I go to bed unless she’s sick or it’s been a tough day. As long as she’s getting enough sleep we permit it.