My parents allowed my youngest brother to be “homeschooled”, and I’m angry

[Anonymous]

Good for them! Your brother is going to sink or swim on his own. I have no problem with him enjoying his passion for the last two years of his childhood-formal or non-schooling be damned. The only thing you should do is engage him - not lecture him - about what he’s planning on doing as an adult. You might be surprised and find that he has a clear idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you post about this before? It sounds very familiar.

There is nothing you can do apart from persuading your brother to re-enroll, and selling him on the benefits of a college education. However, is there money for college? Even community college?

Also, do special needs run in your family? Any untreated ADHD or dyslexia?

OP here. No I have not posted about about this before. I’m not aware of special needs running in my family but untreated ones may present.

There is no money but he has a car commuting to CC could be an option if he wanted to, although it’d probably have to be part-time at first and he’d have to work simultaneously to pay the tuition. If he really wanted to a plan could be cobbled together. Dorming at a college is not a realistic option for him financially or academically anytime soon. If he decided to join the military and then go afterwards, it would be.

I do have a decent relationship with my parents. I’ve suggested that maybe homeschooling in the fashion they are might not be a great idea, but they would not budge. One of them actually works in a unionized trade, and I’ve suggested they nudge my brother in that direction. But this parent says that my brother isn’t capable of completing the program, and I think my brother hears that messaging. My brother says he has no interest in a trade. My brother also watches a lot of YouTube and TikTok videos from people claiming you can “get rich quick” by “investing” in some crap, including things that bear similarities to MLMs. He mocks normal jobs and says that he is “never going to slave away at a 9-5” and is going to be an “entrepreneur.” I try not to discourage him, but he hasn’t shown that he’s hardworking in other areas of life. He’s still a child and I suspect it will take until after the time of high school graduation for him to develop realistic goals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you post about this before? It sounds very familiar.

There is nothing you can do apart from persuading your brother to re-enroll, and selling him on the benefits of a college education. However, is there money for college? Even community college?

Also, do special needs run in your family? Any untreated ADHD or dyslexia?

OP here. No I have not posted about about this before. I’m not aware of special needs running in my family but untreated ones may present.

There is no money but he has a car commuting to CC could be an option if he wanted to, although it’d probably have to be part-time at first and he’d have to work simultaneously to pay the tuition. If he really wanted to a plan could be cobbled together. Dorming at a college is not a realistic option for him financially or academically anytime soon. If he decided to join the military and then go afterwards, it would be.

I do have a decent relationship with my parents. I’ve suggested that maybe homeschooling in the fashion they are might not be a great idea, but they would not budge. One of them actually works in a unionized trade, and I’ve suggested they nudge my brother in that direction. But this parent says that my brother isn’t capable of completing the program, and I think my brother hears that messaging. My brother says he has no interest in a trade. My brother also watches a lot of YouTube and TikTok videos from people claiming you can “get rich quick” by “investing” in some crap, including things that bear similarities to MLMs. He mocks normal jobs and says that he is “never going to slave away at a 9-5” and is going to be an “entrepreneur.” I try not to discourage him, but he hasn’t shown that he’s hardworking in other areas of life. He’s still a child and I suspect it will take until after the time of high school graduation for him to develop realistic goals.

He sounds immature and lacking in discipline. I’d suggest military.

[Anonymous]

The good thing is someday you can have your own kids and do everything perfectly right and really show them. Because it's clear you have all the answers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The good thing is someday you can have your own kids and do everything perfectly right and really show them. Because it's clear you have all the answers.

OP ignore this troll. You are doing a good thing by caring and trying to help your brother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can start by MYOB

I'm not the OP but I guess it depends on what kind of family dynamic you have. In my family, my underage brother is my business.

+100. My sibling's well-being is absolutely my business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you post about this before? It sounds very familiar.

There is nothing you can do apart from persuading your brother to re-enroll, and selling him on the benefits of a college education. However, is there money for college? Even community college?

Also, do special needs run in your family? Any untreated ADHD or dyslexia?

OP here. No I have not posted about about this before. I’m not aware of special needs running in my family but untreated ones may present.

There is no money but he has a car commuting to CC could be an option if he wanted to, although it’d probably have to be part-time at first and he’d have to work simultaneously to pay the tuition. If he really wanted to a plan could be cobbled together. Dorming at a college is not a realistic option for him financially or academically anytime soon. If he decided to join the military and then go afterwards, it would be.

I do have a decent relationship with my parents. I’ve suggested that maybe homeschooling in the fashion they are might not be a great idea, but they would not budge. One of them actually works in a unionized trade, and I’ve suggested they nudge my brother in that direction. But this parent says that my brother isn’t capable of completing the program, and I think my brother hears that messaging. My brother says he has no interest in a trade. My brother also watches a lot of YouTube and TikTok videos from people claiming you can “get rich quick” by “investing” in some crap, including things that bear similarities to MLMs. He mocks normal jobs and says that he is “never going to slave away at a 9-5” and is going to be an “entrepreneur.” I try not to discourage him, but he hasn’t shown that he’s hardworking in other areas of life. He’s still a child and I suspect it will take until after the time of high school graduation for him to develop realistic goals.

He sounds immature and lacking in discipline. I’d suggest military.

Agree. Let him fail a bit then he’ll him sign up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The good thing is someday you can have your own kids and do everything perfectly right and really show them. Because it's clear you have all the answers.

OP ignore this troll. You are doing a good thing by caring and trying to help your brother.

Nope. I have a brother like this and I have learned to just stay out of it.

[Anonymous]

Why are you upset? Do you think they’re not putting him on a path to a trade or otherwise viable job path?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why are you upset? Do you think they’re not putting him on a path to a trade or otherwise viable job path?

Not OP, but obviously yes? She just said that a few posts above.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The good thing is someday you can have your own kids and do everything perfectly right and really show them. Because it's clear you have all the answers.

OP ignore this troll. You are doing a good thing by caring and trying to help your brother.

Nope. I have a brother like this and I have learned to just stay out of it.

That's not what you posted though. Your post suggested that the OP was a know it all and should mind her business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The good thing is someday you can have your own kids and do everything perfectly right and really show them. Because it's clear you have all the answers.

OP ignore this troll. You are doing a good thing by caring and trying to help your brother.

Nope. I have a brother like this and I have learned to just stay out of it.

That's not what you posted though. Your post suggested that the OP was a know it all and should mind her business.

But she does think she knows best. She is not the parent. She can't fix this. When she has her own kids she will understand.

[Anonymous]

See if he wants your advice. If he doesn’t, let him be. He may just need to grow up a bit. It sounds like he will graduate since he’s being homeschooled.

If he matures later, look into seeing if he would be interested in a vocational apprenticeship.

My freshman sounds a lot like your brother but we are forcing him to go to school. I’m not sure we still would if this is going on two years later. At that point, quickly getting a diploma and moving on seems better even if it’s “homeschool.” My backup plan is encouraging an apprenticeship of some sort since my son likes to work, just not on school.

[Anonymous]

Isn’t there a governing body that checks up on the homeschooled kids? My friend homeschooled in the state of MD and I am pretty sure she had to fill out some forms (maybe to the state?)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If he has a history of refusing to go to school and also gets terrible grades, I think it was smart of our parents to pull him out. I did the same for my HS senior for those exact reasons. Are you sure he's not doing the work? The program my kid is in doesen't have class hours, they were just given the work and have to complete it by the deadline. And I told my kid, I already completed HS and have a diploma, this is up to him. I'm not gong to micro-manage, I'm not going to hound him and look over his shoulder. I told him this is his responsibility and he needs to step up to the plate. Now i do still check-up on him but to an extent. I also told him he will always have a place to live as long as I'm alive and as LONG as he is holding up his end of the bargain. I'm not supporting an unemployed 25-year-old who plays video games all day and smokes weed. And I mean that, he will not be living under my roof in that scenario. As long as he is working (or in school) and making choices to better himself and become independent, I'll always have his back. Your parents need to have a come to jesus conversation with your brother. You should also talk to him, if you're close like that.

Will you adopt me so that I can play video games all day in your basement?