In your opinion, do most parents love their children more than themselves?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
In the sense that I would die so my children could live, certainly. I believe most parents would have that impulse.

+1

But, it’s such a different kind of feeling, at least for me. I like myself a lot and ignore my needs, but I’d do anything for my kids.

[Anonymous]

^^*don’t* ignore my needs! Haha

[Anonymous]

I remember when my firstborn was an infant, I realized that I would die for him *and not even really mind doing it*. It was such a weird thought, because nothing I’d ever felt before even approached that. And I have a close, loving family!

16 years later, I still feel that way. I don’t WANT to die. But if it meant saving my kids, sign me up!

[Anonymous]

Yes. Can't tell you why because it just happened.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. Can't tell you why because it just happened.

Meaning, Just happened on its own. Nothing I can explain away even if I wanted to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your answer is yes or no, why or why not?

You answer first. This question is really stupid. You can love both your kids and yourself

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These responses are so interesting to me. I’d say definitley yes, but I guess I’m an outlier?

If you are an outlier, then I'm with you. I say definitely yes, too.

[Anonymous]

Most people don’t love themselves all that much. That’s too bad.

Most people love their kids unconditionally, even when they being jerks.

Most people love their spouses conditionally and don’t take into consideration that their marriage will continue long after the kids leave the house.

And Yes, most female identifying parents put their own needs and desires second to the needs and desires of their children. Male identifying parents do it to, but with less frequency or amount of sacrifice. Is this done out of love? Sometimes. But sometimes it’s guilt, adhering to societal expectations, or convenience / expediency.

Do I love my children more than myself? No. I don’t think I do. Do I give up time I’d rather be napping or working on hobbies to do things they enjoy? Yes. Because it benefits me to raise happy, well adjusted future adults. Do I sometimes give my 5 yr old the last donut even though I wanted it? Yes, but not because I love him more than myself, but because I value the peace of not arguing more than than enjoyment of the pastry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your answer is yes or no, why or why not?

You answer first. This question is really stupid. You can love both your kids and yourself

No one said anything that contradicted your last sentence.

[Anonymous]

I guess I try to love myself each day so I can teach my kids self love and being loved. I try not to appear like a martyr but my kids are 100 percent priority in all I do. Food, clothes, sports, etc. My ex H does the bare minimum and focuses on online dating and buying new things for himself. Most likely does not really love himself but acts like his kids are number 1. If I was not there to remind him he would not know much about their needs.

[Anonymous]

My kids love me so much that it scares me. It's overwhelming.

[Anonymous]

Love is not a quantifiable thing. You can not love more or less, and you aren't going to run out of love to feel. You just love.

Love gets mixed with many other emotions and makes each totality of attitude/feeling/emotion we have toward any given person have its own unique flavor and mix, complicated, layered, and nuanced by experiences. Your love for each human being you encounter is therefore the same, but your total emotion toward each is unique.

[Anonymous]

It seems like my own parents get more and more self-involved the older they get. They are approaching retirement age now and expect me to make a lot of accommodations and sacrifices for them, neverminded that unlike them, I'm working a fulltime job and raising young children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Love is not a quantifiable thing. You can not love more or less, and you aren't going to run out of love to feel. You just love.

Love gets mixed with many other emotions and makes each totality of attitude/feeling/emotion we have toward any given person have its own unique flavor and mix, complicated, layered, and nuanced by experiences. Your love for each human being you encounter is therefore the same, but your total emotion toward each is unique.

wut?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Love is not a quantifiable thing. You can not love more or less, and you aren't going to run out of love to feel. You just love.

Love gets mixed with many other emotions and makes each totality of attitude/feeling/emotion we have toward any given person have its own unique flavor and mix, complicated, layered, and nuanced by experiences. Your love for each human being you encounter is therefore the same, but your total emotion toward each is unique.

This. Its a weird question. In regular life i love my kids snd i love husband and myself. And we have healthy relationships. In a situation of life and death i would save my kids but thats biology more than anything. My time is done, i am 40 but i did my biological duty and had kids and continued the human race (so did DH).