Do teachers share notes on parents?

[Anonymous]

Yes, 100% yes.
-teacher

[Anonymous]

Absolutely. "Susie's mom will drive you nuts."

[Anonymous]

I called out a teacher on back to school night one year (high school) when she made disparaging remarks about her students to their parents, stating “perhaps they aren’t as bright as the parents think they are”. I pointed out to her that is 90% of your students fail the first test, it’s probably best to ask yourself as a teacher where you went wrong. She wasn’t pleased.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I called out a teacher on back to school night one year (high school) when she made disparaging remarks about her students to their parents, stating “perhaps they aren’t as bright as the parents think they are”. I pointed out to her that is 90% of your students fail the first test, it’s probably best to ask yourself as a teacher where you went wrong. She wasn’t pleased.

If anyone is looking for a five-word stand-in for an actual red flag, I think we have one now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I called out a teacher on back to school night one year (high school) when she made disparaging remarks about her students to their parents, stating “perhaps they aren’t as bright as the parents think they are”. I pointed out to her that is 90% of your students fail the first test, it’s probably best to ask yourself as a teacher where you went wrong. She wasn’t pleased.

Hahahahaha. The irony of posting this on this thread of all threads. Never change.

[Anonymous]

Not routinely but if you are crazy, it will probably come up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I called out a teacher on back to school night one year (high school) when she made disparaging remarks about her students to their parents, stating “perhaps they aren’t as bright as the parents think they are”. I pointed out to her that is 90% of your students fail the first test, it’s probably best to ask yourself as a teacher where you went wrong. She wasn’t pleased.

If anyone is looking for a five-word stand-in for an actual red flag, I think we have one now.

Eh, team PP. If a teacher is announcing to a roomful of parents that their kids aren’t all that bright, they probably lack the intellectual wherewithal to be an effective educator.

[Anonymous]

Of course, but not in writing.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely. - signed, former school administrator.

[Anonymous]

Sadly YES. DC was treated unfairly by first grade teacher and when I dared to complain (after failing to resolve with teacher), the principal set up an intervention meeting with the 1st grade and K teacher so they could all disparage DC. The K teacher previously gave DC high marks for classroom behavior, writing, reading and told me DC was "gifted" in Math. They GOT me--I silently sulked in that meeting, barely speaking because I was outnumbered. Their purpose was to prove the 1st grade teacher RIGHT and the parent WRONG. (in my defense, many parents through the years had trouble with this same teacher but few dared to complain.)

The next year, the 2nd grade teacher would not speak to me for the first half of the year, even though I was pleasant, thanked her for classroom efforts and made sure DC turned in all assignments and behaved well. But I ended up leaving that school for Catholic school, based on the first intervention which soured me. DC is thriving in school now and teachers have been fair and wonderful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I called out a teacher on back to school night one year (high school) when she made disparaging remarks about her students to their parents, stating “perhaps they aren’t as bright as the parents think they are”. I pointed out to her that is 90% of your students fail the first test, it’s probably best to ask yourself as a teacher where you went wrong. She wasn’t pleased.

If anyone is looking for a five-word stand-in for an actual red flag, I think we have one now.

Eh, team PP. If a teacher is announcing to a roomful of parents that their kids aren’t all that bright, they probably lack the intellectual wherewithal to be an effective educator.

We know what PP thinks the teacher said. What seems more likely is that the teacher pointed out that not every kid will breeze through the most-accelerated classes throughout school, and some kids may need to work harder or drop down a level. I've heard teachers make that observation, and I've seen the offended parents.

[Anonymous]

If the parents stand out in some way (good or bad), yes.

Good parents: communicate/respond quickly when teacher reaches out; are glad to volunteer/be involved when the teacher requests parent involvement; come to conferences and listen to what teacher has to say; back the teacher up if there's ever a behavior issue w/ the student; make sure student is supported at home--doing homework, studying, well rested, etc. that helps them succeed at school

Bad parents: are rude or condescending to the teachers; demand too many accommodations from teachers (not talking about in the context of a real issue or IEP/504 plan, etc. just in terms of parents asking for special requests for their kids that are creating more work for teachers unnecessarily); email/phone teacher about every little issue; are argumentative/combative and resistant when an issue comes up w/ student; don't prepare their kids for school and/or don't set their kids up for success in school; don't show up to conferences or don't respond to communication from teacher

Those are the ones you will hear about from other teachers. The kids whose parents are not in the good or bad category you won't hear about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the parents stand out in some way (good or bad), yes.

Good parents: communicate/respond quickly when teacher reaches out; are glad to volunteer/be involved when the teacher requests parent involvement; come to conferences and listen to what teacher has to say; back the teacher up if there's ever a behavior issue w/ the student; make sure student is supported at home--doing homework, studying, well rested, etc. that helps them succeed at school

Bad parents: are rude or condescending to the teachers; demand too many accommodations from teachers (not talking about in the context of a real issue or IEP/504 plan, etc. just in terms of parents asking for special requests for their kids that are creating more work for teachers unnecessarily); email/phone teacher about every little issue; are argumentative/combative and resistant when an issue comes up w/ student; don't prepare their kids for school and/or don't set their kids up for success in school; don't show up to conferences or don't respond to communication from teacher

Those are the ones you will hear about from other teachers. The kids whose parents are not in the good or bad category you won't hear about.

Np. This is helpful. Looks like I will never be the subject of conversation.

[Anonymous]

Lol yes- of course we do. Mostly we pass along helpful tips for working with more difficult parents. (ex: This mom can appear very abrasive via email but if you talk to her on the phone, she is much more reasonable.) But yea- if you are noteworthy....we will certainly pass along a warning!

To be fair, we also pass along positive notes about certain parents too (ex: "This dad is so great- email him with any concerns and he will be right on it.")

[Anonymous]

Based upon one dad's behavior/questions at my second grader's btsn last night, they don't have to share notes, because we all know. Boy do we know.

I'm sure though they share notes, because don't we all?