WWYD: kid sick before birthday party

[Anonymous]

Don’t put the burden on the other family. If I was the host, I’d feel bad telling you to stay home and annoyed that you put that on me.

I just hosted a party for 8yr olds. One girl canceled the morning of the party pending a test for “probably just a cold” with a negative rapid. Nope, Covid. Confirmed by PCR after a parent tested positive the evening of the party.

My kids had Covid a few weeks before and while health-wise for us it was a non-event, but my kids still missed anticipated camps and activities with friends. I missed work because we had to stay home.

Giving another kid a cold, is just adding a burden to other families to keep kids home and get PCR tests to clear them to go back to camp. Missing 1-2 days of a 5 day camp is a lot.

[Anonymous]

OP, I get the sense that if you were not hosting and your child were just an attendee of a birthday party, you’d probably keep her home. The logic is very simple. Stay home when you are sick. I know it’s just a cold and in the before times, we used to let kids (and adults) go places with mild colds. But the pp’s pointed out all the ways her going could ripple out to mess other people up. I don’t think it’s fair to put the burden of the decision on the other family. I think you should make an effort to reschedule the party (possibly without the other friend). Surely you can find another date in the next month that works. Parties also don’t need to be on weekends necessarily. I’m always thrilled with a party on an early release school day or a Friday night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t go. Tell your child that you will do something later to make it up. This how viruses spread and mutate. But also, they may end up giving it to someone with a weakened immune system.

All kids are going to have weakened immune systems because they haven’t been exposed to anything for years! Continuing to live this way isn’t realistic.

[Anonymous]

How is this a question. No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t go. Tell your child that you will do something later to make it up. This how viruses spread and mutate. But also, they may end up giving it to someone with a weakened immune system.

All kids are going to have weakened immune systems because they haven’t been exposed to anything for years! Continuing to live this way isn’t realistic.

It’s really crummy to make other people sick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you do a PCR test? I’d be ok with negative PCR if your dd was masked the whole time. I know people are going to say it’s just a cold, but even passing on a cold these days is a burden bc then the person with the cold has to skip things, test, etc

OP here - yes, negative PCR. Your point about repercussions for even simple colds in the covid-era is why I am conflicted.

I'd probably let her mask and send her, provided symptoms don't escalate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please tell me you are not in McLean.

??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you do a PCR test? I’d be ok with negative PCR if your dd was masked the whole time. I know people are going to say it’s just a cold, but even passing on a cold these days is a burden bc then the person with the cold has to skip things, test, etc

OP here - yes, negative PCR. Your point about repercussions for even simple colds in the covid-era is why I am conflicted.

How are you conflicted? Your child is sick and should stay home. If you make a child sick, you can make the entire family sick. They will miss work, doctors appointments and many other things. That is really selfish over a party. I missed several important doctors appointments (and we are very careful - we'd never even go to a party let alone much indoors) and now have to wait months to reschedule (and I'm talking about things like an CT finding a lump in my breast) and other testing because someone like you couldn't stay home as I couldn't go to my appointments sick.

[Anonymous]

I would keep them home for a cold. Because even colds can cause a lot of household disruption these days in places where everyone is still very worried about covid. If I can't send my kid to camp with cold symptoms, then I don't want them getting a cold at a birthday party and preventing me from working an entire week.

[Anonymous]

It’s her birthday! Have her wear a mask and just let other people know beforehand about the situation so they can choose not to come if they’re not comfortable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would skip the party and reschedule a new dedicated party once the child is healthy. Even if it is not Covid, any kind of cold is a massive pain right now for parents with travel or in-person work policies. Another family getting your cold could affect a vacation, family event, or require them to miss important work functions.

+1. I would be massively annoyed if the host kid was sick and still having the party.

Agree. Hugely annoyed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We wouldn't go. We would be responsible and stay home and send our regrets.

+1 how is this a question?

+2

Over and over we’re hearing people argue it’s just a cold. It not responsible to spread cold germs around either just because you have FOMO around a social event.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is absurd…it’s a cold. I’d have no problem with it and wouldn’t expect your DD to mask. Think of how many kids went to school with colds pre 2020 and no one thought twice. If it’s not Covid, no big deal.

I agree. Esp with an outdoor party!

[Anonymous]

I think part of the question is because the sick child is host. Should the party be canceled since one of the hosts can’t attend? Does OP have to plan another party for her kid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think part of the question is because the sick child is host. Should the party be canceled since one of the hosts can’t attend? Does OP have to plan another party for her kid?

The other birthday kid should get to keep the party and OP can reschedule in a few weeks.