Busy as a mark of superiority

[Anonymous]

I don’t really understand having no time for tv or books - like not even 30 minutes? I’m guessing they have some other way they relax? Maybe they sit in bed scrolling instagram everyday before bed instead of reading or tv?

[Anonymous]

Competing over busy-ness. You nailed it Op. It poisons relationships. Acquaintences can't risk involvement or authenticity. That might part the curtain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Competing over busy-ness. You nailed it Op. It poisons relationships. Acquaintences can't risk involvement or authenticity. That might part the curtain.

Fundamentally it’s this. + 1.

[Anonymous]

Competing over busy-ness? What family/mom actually WANTS to be super busy? It sucks.

~A super busy mom that is hating life

[Anonymous]

I am a sahm of 3 kids and my kids are busy. My 2 boys are playing tennis, soccer and golf this spring. I also have a young one I have to lug around. Little one just started swim. I did not sign her up for soccer because I wanted a rest day family day on the weekend.

During Covid, I still found time to binge watch some shows on Netflix.

The moms saying they are too busy to watch tv is just BS. Some people don’t like tv and that is fine. My ultra busy Dh still watches mandalorian with our kids and we very occasionally will watch a show together.

I think you are being insecure for no reason. I thought you were going to say other moms make you feel bad by piling on the baby/toddler activities and outings. I don’t work now but I worked until my oldest was 5. I wanted to take my baby to baby music class so badly.

[Anonymous]

I have three kids, a FT job and still have time to watch tv series every night.

I have to say though that as kids get older, life gets busier and times shrinks. You only have a 1 year old… it will be busier when he/she is 6+ and has activities, birthday parties, homework’s, more needs, etc…. If double that with 2 or 3 kids…. It’s a lot.

I am with you though… I find people who always say they have no time for tv, books, distractions annoying martyrs.

[Anonymous]

Capitalism glorifies busy, so SAHMs are likely to be especially sensitive about it. As if homemaking isn’t work. It sure is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have three kids, a FT job and still have time to watch tv series every night.

I have to say though that as kids get older, life gets busier and times shrinks. You only have a 1 year old… it will be busier when he/she is 6+ and has activities, birthday parties, homework’s, more needs, etc…. If double that with 2 or 3 kids…. It’s a lot.

I am with you though… I find people who always say they have no time for tv, books, distractions annoying martyrs.

See 14:04.

[Anonymous]

It's not just parents. There's a subset of people or a culture that uses "busyness" as a proxy for success/importance/popularity/productivity/etc. I just feel sorry for people who go on and on about how busy they are. Either they really are that busy and have no time for their own interests and hobbies, or they aren't and feel like they have to pretend they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have three kids, a FT job and still have time to watch tv series every night.

I have to say though that as kids get older, life gets busier and times shrinks. You only have a 1 year old… it will be busier when he/she is 6+ and has activities, birthday parties, homework’s, more needs, etc…. If double that with 2 or 3 kids…. It’s a lot.

I am with you though… I find people who always say they have no time for tv, books, distractions annoying martyrs.

As a fellow FT working mom of three, you have to learn to say no to some things and find less stressful versions of things. Some people absolutely choose to be super busy and, yes, for some of them, it becomes a competition.

[Anonymous]

I’m a SAHM and I’m not “busy” at all although my life is full enough for me. That was pretty much the point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What I hate about these posts is it keeps women fighting each other rather than going after the real problem - MEN. Men who work until 10pm and all weekend to avoid family responsibilities, men who dump everything on their wives so their wives and zero time to read a book, men who make their wives feel like they need to justify their existence by being “busy”.

+1 OP - you are furthering the superiority games by posting here. You should all be bonding over how little your husbands do (from the sound of it) and use it as a support group for changing your marriages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I hate about these posts is it keeps women fighting each other rather than going after the real problem - MEN. Men who work until 10pm and all weekend to avoid family responsibilities, men who dump everything on their wives so their wives and zero time to read a book, men who make their wives feel like they need to justify their existence by being “busy”.

+1 OP - you are furthering the superiority games by posting here. You should all be bonding over how little your husbands do (from the sound of it) and use it as a support group for changing your marriages.

Yeah, so you JUST did the thing PP was talking about: fighting with other women and showing your own superiority (my husband does more than yours!!!).

Grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I hate about these posts is it keeps women fighting each other rather than going after the real problem - MEN. Men who work until 10pm and all weekend to avoid family responsibilities, men who dump everything on their wives so their wives and zero time to read a book, men who make their wives feel like they need to justify their existence by being “busy”.

+1 OP - you are furthering the superiority games by posting here. You should all be bonding over how little your husbands do (from the sound of it) and use it as a support group for changing your marriages.

Yeah, so you JUST did the thing PP was talking about: fighting with other women and showing your own superiority (my husband does more than yours!!!).

Grow up.

+ 1.

[Anonymous]

My friend “brags” on being busy but in reality her husband doesnt really help and she looks tired. She would rather scroll Instagram than watch TV. Not sure if that is superior.