I hate funeral processions

Anonymous
My DH will attest that I do not like driving in a funeral procession, especially if your car is at the end of the line. It feels unsafe to me and I totally become a backseat driver! Some areas have a police escort and another police car at the end of the line. The red swirling lights of the police car keep the crazies from pretending they don’t see you. Who wants to die driving to a cemetery?
Anonymous
It's like 2 minutes. Big whoop. I love having extra time in the car to listen to more music.
Anonymous
Get over yourself.
Unless you live beside a cemetery and are routinely driving in the middle of the day, this is at most a 5-minute occurrence once or twice a year.
Be thankful that you're not in the procession.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I love a funeral procession.

It makes people in this self important area take a minute to let somebody matter more for 1second.


And any dead person garners more respect from me than the petulant OP.


What if it’s me, the OP, in a funeral procession my family has against my will?
Anonymous
Guys, it’s not the delay I’m mad about! It’s the safety! I actually probably do see them a lot more than other people because of the cemetery at Fort Lincoln but when those processions roll across RI ave it is NOT safe. They don’t have police escorts, they just have hazards and little mirror tags and the people arriving at a green light at the intersection don’t know what’s going on.

I’m not irritated at the dead person! I’m irritated by the alive people. We have GPS, guys. Being distraught is an even BETTER reason not to have to try to race through a red light in a convoy that has gotten all spread out. Take your time, listen to Siri, and stop at red lights.

The person who said it’s to prevent a traffic jam at the cemetery, that doesn’t make sense. I mean churches have simultaneous crowds all the time. If there’s a light, worst case there’s a brief backup. No biggie.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Many people in those processions don't know how to get where they are going and are somewhat distraught already -- far safer to let a line of lost, mourning people blindly follow the funeral director. Much safer.


Yep. I agree with all of this.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Guys, it’s not the delay I’m mad about! It’s the safety! I actually probably do see them a lot more than other people because of the cemetery at Fort Lincoln but when those processions roll across RI ave it is NOT safe. They don’t have police escorts, they just have hazards and little mirror tags and the people arriving at a green light at the intersection don’t know what’s going on.

I’m not irritated at the dead person! I’m irritated by the alive people. We have GPS, guys. Being distraught is an even BETTER reason not to have to try to race through a red light in a convoy that has gotten all spread out. Take your time, listen to Siri, and stop at red lights.

The person who said it’s to prevent a traffic jam at the cemetery, that doesn’t make sense. I mean churches have simultaneous crowds all the time. If there’s a light, worst case there’s a brief backup. No biggie.


Here are some better ways to force strangers to honor and remember your loved one:

Obituaries.
Memorial benches.
Billboards.
Anonymous
“ The red swirling lights of the police car”

Careful, you’re dating yourself. Emergency lights stopped swirling over 20 years ago. They went strobe, then LED.

This is not CHIPS. 😀

I agree OP needs to unclench.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Many people in those processions don't know how to get where they are going and are somewhat distraught already -- far safer to let a line of lost, mourning people blindly follow the funeral director. Much safer.


Yep. I agree with all of this.


This is absolutely ridiculous. It would clearly be safer to follow GPS than try to stay with a funeral procession. If you’re too distraught to drive, you need to have a driver.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I love a funeral procession.

It makes people in this self important area take a minute to let somebody matter more for 1second.


And any dead person garners more respect from me than the petulant OP.


What if it’s me, the OP, in a funeral procession my family has against my will?


Get your lawyer to write them out of the will.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:“ The red swirling lights of the police car”

Careful, you’re dating yourself. Emergency lights stopped swirling over 20 years ago. They went strobe, then LED.

This is not CHIPS. 😀

I agree OP needs to unclench.


Red is emergency. Blue is police.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Why is this a thing? It’s dangerous to have a bunch of cars running through lights. It makes no sense. Spoiler alert, the dead person can wait for you to get there.

I know it’s mean to complain because someone died, that’s why I’m doing it here.

I just need to get it off my chest. Unless random people are lining the streets to see your casket go by, you don’t need a funeral procession. Little tags on the mirror are not a good reason to suspend laws and risk lives.

Do you know what would be better? Have the hearse wait 20 minutes at the church so everyone can get to the cemetery and then have to wait around for your final fashionably late grand entrance.

Or, put everybody in a tour bus with the casket in the middle and see where people decide to sit.

Okay thank you.


I've read some insensitive shit on this board. This one wins.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why is this a thing? It’s dangerous to have a bunch of cars running through lights. It makes no sense. Spoiler alert, the dead person can wait for you to get there.

I know it’s mean to complain because someone died, that’s why I’m doing it here.

I just need to get it off my chest. Unless random people are lining the streets to see your casket go by, you don’t need a funeral procession. Little tags on the mirror are not a good reason to suspend laws and risk lives.

Do you know what would be better? Have the hearse wait 20 minutes at the church so everyone can get to the cemetery and then have to wait around for your final fashionably late grand entrance.

Or, put everybody in a tour bus with the casket in the middle and see where people decide to sit.

Okay thank you.


I've read some insensitive shit on this board. This one wins.


People in the DC area never surprise me with their egotism. Ugh.
Anonymous
It’s the average drivers among us, texting and rushing and ignoring signs and signals that are the hazard. Keep your eyes on the road and you’ll be fine.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
My being 2 minutes late to pick up my kid or something is a minor nuisance compared to the day of the people attending the funeral.

I send out good thoughts from the bottom of my cold unreligious heart and take a moment to be thankful for my and my family's health.


THIS

OP, BE KIND.
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