If you are unsure about divorcing - take a trip together

[Anonymous]

I would back it up even more.

I won a free luxury NYC weekend over Christmas with all the shows included and I realized I don't want to go with my wife. We are sexless and the idea of going on a trip with her is too painful. When you know you don't want to go on vacation with your spouse is when you should throw in the towel. Like a PP said, she wants to work on things, but I am tired of working. Perhaps its also because she is a SAHM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would back it up even more.

I won a free luxury NYC weekend over Christmas with all the shows included and I realized I don't want to go with my wife. We are sexless and the idea of going on a trip with her is too painful. When you know you don't want to go on vacation with your spouse is when you should throw in the towel. Like a PP said, she wants to work on things, but I am tired of working. Perhaps its also because she is a SAHM.

What does being a SAHM have to do with this? Not following.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would back it up even more.

I won a free luxury NYC weekend over Christmas with all the shows included and I realized I don't want to go with my wife. We are sexless and the idea of going on a trip with her is too painful. When you know you don't want to go on vacation with your spouse is when you should throw in the towel. Like a PP said, she wants to work on things, but I am tired of working. Perhaps its also because she is a SAHM.

What does being a SAHM have to do with this? Not following.

She doesn't have a job to support herself in divorce.

[Anonymous]

In the 24th year of my marriage I tried to get my H to go with just me (no kids) on a week trip to Florida, just for fun. He declined. Said he didn't like Florida, said he would rather spend time with the kids, said he was saving his time off for an upcoming trip to visit his family in a few months.

I got the message. Even so, he was surprised and upset when I started talking divorce a few months later.

[Anonymous]

We’re signed up for a gray divorce. Been so meh for years, nothing in common. Sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We’re signed up for a gray divorce. Been so meh for years, nothing in common. Sad.

Was it different when you got married?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re signed up for a gray divorce. Been so meh for years, nothing in common. Sad.

Was it different when you got married?

NP here, same situation and we are probably going to get divorced in 4 years when the youngest leaves for college (although my wife may or may not see it the same way).

It was absolutely great when we got married. I would say the first 10 years of our relationship were really, really good. I would have said we were among the happiest and luckiest people in love.

I am sure I share some blame but we really neglected each other for a number of years. Too much resentment and now indifference. I want another shot and love, sex and intimacy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re signed up for a gray divorce. Been so meh for years, nothing in common. Sad.

Was it different when you got married?

NP here, same situation and we are probably going to get divorced in 4 years when the youngest leaves for college (although my wife may or may not see it the same way).

It was absolutely great when we got married. I would say the first 10 years of our relationship were really, really good. I would have said we were among the happiest and luckiest people in love.

I am sure I share some blame but we really neglected each other for a number of years. Too much resentment and now indifference. I want another shot and love, sex and intimacy.

I'm sorry to hear this. If the foundation is strong, might there be things you can do to reprioritize the marriage once you're empty nesters?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re signed up for a gray divorce. Been so meh for years, nothing in common. Sad.

Was it different when you got married?

NP here, same situation and we are probably going to get divorced in 4 years when the youngest leaves for college (although my wife may or may not see it the same way).

It was absolutely great when we got married. I would say the first 10 years of our relationship were really, really good. I would have said we were among the happiest and luckiest people in love.

I am sure I share some blame but we really neglected each other for a number of years. Too much resentment and now indifference. I want another shot and love, sex and intimacy.

LOL. Don’t let this dude fool you. He means sex. That’s all folks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re signed up for a gray divorce. Been so meh for years, nothing in common. Sad.

Was it different when you got married?

NP here, same situation and we are probably going to get divorced in 4 years when the youngest leaves for college (although my wife may or may not see it the same way).

It was absolutely great when we got married. I would say the first 10 years of our relationship were really, really good. I would have said we were among the happiest and luckiest people in love.

I am sure I share some blame but we really neglected each other for a number of years. Too much resentment and now indifference. I want another shot and love, sex and intimacy.

LOL. Don’t let this dude fool you. He means sex. That’s all folks.

What's wrong with wanting a sexual relationship? Would you advise your girlfriend to marry a man who sexually rejects her? Of course not! Why stay married to someone whom you aren't having sex with once the kids are gone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re signed up for a gray divorce. Been so meh for years, nothing in common. Sad.

Was it different when you got married?

NP here, same situation and we are probably going to get divorced in 4 years when the youngest leaves for college (although my wife may or may not see it the same way).

It was absolutely great when we got married. I would say the first 10 years of our relationship were really, really good. I would have said we were among the happiest and luckiest people in love.

I am sure I share some blame but we really neglected each other for a number of years. Too much resentment and now indifference. I want another shot and love, sex and intimacy.

I'm sorry to hear this. If the foundation is strong, might there be things you can do to reprioritize the marriage once you're empty nesters?

In my experience, it's too late at that point. You can't neglect your spouse for years, either emotionally or sexually and then expect them to forget it when the kids are gone. Too much resentment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re signed up for a gray divorce. Been so meh for years, nothing in common. Sad.

Was it different when you got married?

NP here, same situation and we are probably going to get divorced in 4 years when the youngest leaves for college (although my wife may or may not see it the same way).

It was absolutely great when we got married. I would say the first 10 years of our relationship were really, really good. I would have said we were among the happiest and luckiest people in love.

I am sure I share some blame but we really neglected each other for a number of years. Too much resentment and now indifference. I want another shot and love, sex and intimacy.

LOL. Don’t let this dude fool you. He means sex. That’s all folks.

What's wrong with wanting a sexual relationship? Would you advise your girlfriend to marry a man who sexually rejects her? Of course not! Why stay married to someone whom you aren't having sex with once the kids are gone?

Nothing but stop pretending you want love and intimacy too. No man talks like that. I see through this a mile away

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re signed up for a gray divorce. Been so meh for years, nothing in common. Sad.

Was it different when you got married?

NP here, same situation and we are probably going to get divorced in 4 years when the youngest leaves for college (although my wife may or may not see it the same way).

It was absolutely great when we got married. I would say the first 10 years of our relationship were really, really good. I would have said we were among the happiest and luckiest people in love.

I am sure I share some blame but we really neglected each other for a number of years. Too much resentment and now indifference. I want another shot and love, sex and intimacy.

LOL. Don’t let this dude fool you. He means sex. That’s all folks.

What's wrong with wanting a sexual relationship? Would you advise your girlfriend to marry a man who sexually rejects her? Of course not! Why stay married to someone whom you aren't having sex with once the kids are gone?

Nothing but stop pretending you want love and intimacy too. No man talks like that. I see through this a mile away

Huh, I always viewed sex, love and intimacy as connected and essential in marriages. I never knew there were so many sexless marriages that people argued were normal until these posts.