If you are unsure about divorcing - take a trip together

[Anonymous]

In my experience and in my observation, trips together seem to be a catalyst for divorce when a marriage is in the process of breaking down, or a breakup is about to happen. So if you are tired of dithering, try that.

We decided to divorce after talking about it for a year after we took a trip together. It was like it put in stark detail that we didn't enjoy each other's company anymore and were just done. This happened to 2 good friends of mine as well. Additionally, looking back I realized that the trip to Costa Rica I took with my previous serious boyfriend was the inflection point for me deciding I was done.


Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my experience and in my observation, trips together seem to be a catalyst for divorce when a marriage is in the process of breaking down, or a breakup is about to happen. So if you are tired of dithering, try that.

We decided to divorce after talking about it for a year after we took a trip together. It was like it put in stark detail that we didn't enjoy each other's company anymore and were just done. This happened to 2 good friends of mine as well. Additionally, looking back I realized that the trip to Costa Rica I took with my previous serious boyfriend was the inflection point for me deciding I was done.


Thoughts?

As a general rule couples who can travel together can get along well together. However, even man I have ever been with has been impossible right before traveling.

[Anonymous]

I think that none of those couples needed a trip to know they should be divorced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think that none of those couples needed a trip to know they should be divorced.

I think it is hard to see in the day-to-day in the moment. We see posters here all the time trying to figure out what to do. I was like them. It was the trip that made me realize it needed to happen and to stop wasting my time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my experience and in my observation, trips together seem to be a catalyst for divorce when a marriage is in the process of breaking down, or a breakup is about to happen. So if you are tired of dithering, try that.

We decided to divorce after talking about it for a year after we took a trip together. It was like it put in stark detail that we didn't enjoy each other's company anymore and were just done. This happened to 2 good friends of mine as well. Additionally, looking back I realized that the trip to Costa Rica I took with my previous serious boyfriend was the inflection point for me deciding I was done.

Thoughts?

What happened on the Costa Rica trip to sour you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my experience and in my observation, trips together seem to be a catalyst for divorce when a marriage is in the process of breaking down, or a breakup is about to happen. So if you are tired of dithering, try that.

We decided to divorce after talking about it for a year after we took a trip together. It was like it put in stark detail that we didn't enjoy each other's company anymore and were just done. This happened to 2 good friends of mine as well. Additionally, looking back I realized that the trip to Costa Rica I took with my previous serious boyfriend was the inflection point for me deciding I was done.


Thoughts?

As a general rule couples who can travel together can get along well together. However, even man I have ever been with has been impossible right before traveling.

Ha. Well the stress right before travel IS a thing. I like to clean the whole house, and DH likes to stand at the door and wait for me. I find that very very annoying! But once I'm done cleaning it's all fine.

[Anonymous]

What about being stuck at home during the pandemic? We were stuck at home for the most part for about a year. We barely spoke to one another and had no sex. I think it's time to move on but DW seems to think we should try to salvage things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my experience and in my observation, trips together seem to be a catalyst for divorce when a marriage is in the process of breaking down, or a breakup is about to happen. So if you are tired of dithering, try that.

We decided to divorce after talking about it for a year after we took a trip together. It was like it put in stark detail that we didn't enjoy each other's company anymore and were just done. This happened to 2 good friends of mine as well. Additionally, looking back I realized that the trip to Costa Rica I took with my previous serious boyfriend was the inflection point for me deciding I was done.

Thoughts?

What happened on the Costa Rica trip to sour you?

He was himself. And if I couldn’t enjoy him there I would never enjoy him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about being stuck at home during the pandemic? We were stuck at home for the most part for about a year. We barely spoke to one another and had no sex. I think it's time to move on but DW seems to think we should try to salvage things.

That too. My guess is that it will hurt her financially

[Anonymous]

Lots of people posted during Covid that the divorce rate would soar. Wonder if that happened?

[Anonymous]

This is weird. You don't need a trip. The fact that we had no relationship was obvious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think that none of those couples needed a trip to know they should be divorced.

Agree.

Have had enough “date night” dinners where he has zilch to say about anything or even questions like Hiws your coworker Jeff doing? Or is XYZ married yet? And he just blurts out a No. and looks off.

Why would I need a week off to be ignored by him, think it’s normal to ignore everyone?

[Anonymous]

Obviously this does not apply to everyone. It’s just an idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my experience and in my observation, trips together seem to be a catalyst for divorce when a marriage is in the process of breaking down, or a breakup is about to happen. So if you are tired of dithering, try that.

We decided to divorce after talking about it for a year after we took a trip together. It was like it put in stark detail that we didn't enjoy each other's company anymore and were just done. This happened to 2 good friends of mine as well. Additionally, looking back I realized that the trip to Costa Rica I took with my previous serious boyfriend was the inflection point for me deciding I was done.


Thoughts?

As a general rule couples who can travel together can get along well together. However, even man I have ever been with has been impossible right before traveling.

Are you in therapy to learn why you attract such men and repeat that pattern? Might be a useful thing. Because you do realize that's a you problem and not a general attribute of men in general, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that none of those couples needed a trip to know they should be divorced.

Agree.

Have had enough “date night” dinners where he has zilch to say about anything or even questions like Hiws your coworker Jeff doing? Or is XYZ married yet? And he just blurts out a No. and looks off.

Why would I need a week off to be ignored by him, think it’s normal to ignore everyone?

I would never date a transactional type person. He can’t make conversation.

I need interactional people who can talk about more than just their hyper interests/work.