Most annoying modern parenting lingo

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:About "use your words": my SIL used to be a child psychologist for the school system in Boston, doing home visits with very, very, very troubled pre-schoolers. One of these pre-schoolers hit her during one such visit. She told him to "use his words." So he turned to her and said, "OK. Go f*** yourself". That much for "using your words."

In the real world, the situation described above is not funny at all. Very sad. I hope that little boy gets the love and help he needs.

In the context of this thread, that is freakin' hilarious. "use your words" HA!

I also got a hearty chuckle about the "calm your body" line. I've never heard that before. I'm glad I read it here first, else I probably would have burst out laughing if I heard another parent say it to their child.

I am guilty of using the dreaded third person "mommy" to refer to myself when speaking to my 15 month old son. ACK. I cringe after I do it. MUST.....STOP. I am getting better.....really, I am.

Enjoyed this thread, choosing to read it in a light-hearted sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC, DD, DH, DS, etc. so stupid.

This is especially ridiculous when people are talking about the "DH" they are thinking of leaving.

I always thought the joke was the D could stand for dear, darling, damn... *shrug*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:About "use your words": my SIL used to be a child psychologist for the school system in Boston, doing home visits with very, very, very troubled pre-schoolers. One of these pre-schoolers hit her during one such visit. She told him to "use his words." So he turned to her and said, "OK. Go f*** yourself". That much for "using your words."

In the real world, the situation described above is not funny at all. Very sad. I hope that little boy gets the love and help he needs.

In the context of this thread, that is freakin' hilarious. "use your words" HA!

I also got a hearty chuckle about the "calm your body" line. I've never heard that before. I'm glad I read it here first, else I probably would have burst out laughing if I heard another parent say it to their child.

I am guilty of using the dreaded third person "mommy" to refer to myself when speaking to my 15 month old son. ACK. I cringe after I do it. MUST.....STOP. I am getting better.....really, I am.

Enjoyed this thread, choosing to read it in a light-hearted sense.

I remember reading somewhere that for the youngest kids, referring to yourself in the third person made what you say easier to understand. And I apologize, I don't remember the whole piece, but the gist was that saying "Mama wants you to _____" was a more concrete idea for toddlers, easier for them to grasp than "I want you to _____."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:About "use your words": my SIL used to be a child psychologist for the school system in Boston, doing home visits with very, very, very troubled pre-schoolers. One of these pre-schoolers hit her during one such visit. She told him to "use his words." So he turned to her and said, "OK. Go f*** yourself". That much for "using your words."

In the real world, the situation described above is not funny at all. Very sad. I hope that little boy gets the love and help he needs.

In the context of this thread, that is freakin' hilarious. "use your words" HA!

I also got a hearty chuckle about the "calm your body" line. I've never heard that before. I'm glad I read it here first, else I probably would have burst out laughing if I heard another parent say it to their child.

I am guilty of using the dreaded third person "mommy" to refer to myself when speaking to my 15 month old son. ACK. I cringe after I do it. MUST.....STOP. I am getting better.....really, I am.

Enjoyed this thread, choosing to read it in a light-hearted sense.

I remember reading somewhere that for the youngest kids, referring to yourself in the third person made what you say easier to understand. And I apologize, I don't remember the whole piece, but the gist was that saying "Mama wants you to _____" was a more concrete idea for toddlers, easier for them to grasp than "I want you to _____."

Thank you - this makes me feel better. I'm a new poster but like the PP you quoted I have cringed when I have said "mama is going to get you a tissue but will be right back" to my toddler. But you are right. she knows "mama" but is just learning concepts of I/me etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:About "use your words": my SIL used to be a child psychologist for the school system in Boston, doing home visits with very, very, very troubled pre-schoolers. One of these pre-schoolers hit her during one such visit. She told him to "use his words." So he turned to her and said, "OK. Go f*** yourself". That much for "using your words."

In the real world, the situation described above is not funny at all. Very sad. I hope that little boy gets the love and help he needs.

In the context of this thread, that is freakin' hilarious. "use your words" HA!

I also got a hearty chuckle about the "calm your body" line. I've never heard that before. I'm glad I read it here first, else I probably would have burst out laughing if I heard another parent say it to their child.

I am guilty of using the dreaded third person "mommy" to refer to myself when speaking to my 15 month old son. ACK. I cringe after I do it. MUST.....STOP. I am getting better.....really, I am.

Enjoyed this thread, choosing to read it in a light-hearted sense.

I remember reading somewhere that for the youngest kids, referring to yourself in the third person made what you say easier to understand. And I apologize, I don't remember the whole piece, but the gist was that saying "Mama wants you to _____" was a more concrete idea for toddlers, easier for them to grasp than "I want you to _____."

Yes, because young kids don't understand pronouns.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I am guilty of using the dreaded third person "mommy" to refer to myself when speaking to my 15 month old son. ACK. I cringe after I do it. MUST.....STOP. I am getting better.....really, I am.

Enjoyed this thread, choosing to read it in a light-hearted sense.

I remember reading somewhere that for the youngest kids, referring to yourself in the third person made what you say easier to understand. And I apologize, I don't remember the whole piece, but the gist was that saying "Mama wants you to _____" was a more concrete idea for toddlers, easier for them to grasp than "I want you to _____."

Thank you - this makes me feel better. I'm a new poster but like the PP you quoted I have cringed when I have said "mama is going to get you a tissue but will be right back" to my toddler. But you are right. she knows "mama" but is just learning concepts of I/me etc.

13:00 here again. Yes, I have read and heard that using the third person to refer to myself and son is an easier concept for him to grasp, but still annoying. Pre-baby, one of my friends did it and I thought, "eck." And now here I am.....

I was discussing this with my mom the other day and she said she didn't use this approach with any of us (nor did her peers), and she politely indicated that we all seemed to figure it out. Regardless, if using these annoying "modern" parenting lingo is the worst we all do....I think we're all doing just fine. 8)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:.

Natural = drug free, it's not an opinion thing, it's a fact thing.

Really? It's a fact thing? Like gravity is a fact?

Sorry, it's an opinion. Natural childbirth does not only equal drug free. You'd like to co-opt the word "natural" and apply it only to your preferred means of birthing, but that doesn't make it true. Calling unmedicated childbirth "natural" implies that all other forms of childbirth are unnatural.

Seeing a doctor is unnatural. Giving birth in a hospital or birthing center is unnatural. You want "natural", go birth in the woods. And then gnaw through you baby's umbilical cord.

Wow, negative! You say I'm what's "wrong" with the natural childbirth people, yet you're the one being mean-spirited. Why? Your statement on "natural" meaning the same thing as "unassisted childbirth" is inaccurate as well as rude. Natural can mean mid-wife assisted or even doctor-assisted (I had a doctor-assisted childbirth, so yes, perhaps mine was less "natural" than someone who birthed with a midwife at home). This has been an interesting thread so I'm going to stop engaging with you and boring everyone else. If you want the last word, take it! Or perhaps you could be convinced to argue with the dictionary instead? (See def of word natural at http://www.merriam-webster.com/netdict/natural).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:.

Natural = drug free, it's not an opinion thing, it's a fact thing.

Really? It's a fact thing? Like gravity is a fact?

Sorry, it's an opinion. Natural childbirth does not only equal drug free. You'd like to co-opt the word "natural" and apply it only to your preferred means of birthing, but that doesn't make it true. Calling unmedicated childbirth "natural" implies that all other forms of childbirth are unnatural.

Seeing a doctor is unnatural. Giving birth in a hospital or birthing center is unnatural. You want "natural", go birth in the woods. And then gnaw through you baby's umbilical cord.

Wow, negative! You say I'm what's "wrong" with the natural childbirth people, yet you're the one being mean-spirited. Why? Your statement on "natural" meaning the same thing as "unassisted childbirth" is inaccurate as well as rude. Natural can mean mid-wife assisted or even doctor-assisted (I had a doctor-assisted childbirth, so yes, perhaps mine was less "natural" than someone who birthed with a midwife at home). This has been an interesting thread so I'm going to stop engaging with you and boring everyone else. If you want the last word, take it! Or perhaps you could be convinced to argue with the dictionary instead? (See def of word natural at http://www.merriam-webster.com/netdict/natural).



It really doesn't matter what you call it. Once your kids get a little older, all of this focus on how they were born seems absolutely bizarre. It's one day of their live, one day of yours for each kid. Look through a room full of first graders and you will not be able to tell who got an epidural and who was born into a bathtub full of Unicorn Dust blessed by the Goddess of Placenta.

How we handle our pregnancy and labor is the first of many tests of our mettle as a mothers-- the instinct to do right by this little one and the will to show everyone else that we are great mothers kicks in about five seconds after the plus sign on the pee stick turns pink. So your talent for dilating and your hormones and your kegels and your doctor and your stamina in dealing with contractions is very important at that time. And boy are those "natural" people more successful!! All of the babies come out but theirs come out so naturally. Ah, to be a "natural" at dilating. To be an artist at effacing. It's only a matter of time before this translates to angelic children whose Yale acceptances arrived in 6th grade.

Except that it doesn't matter. If you loved your birth experience, great. But the childbirth industry isn't doing anyone any favors perpetuating the idea that we already have to measure up to something that first, short day.

[Anonymous]

PP you are so damn funny! Unicorn Dust blessed by the Goddess of Placenta?! hahaha

[Anonymous]

Wasn't this thread so much easier when it was "just" a discussion of SAH disdain of the word "school?" OMG

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Natural Childbirth. My childbirth educator at Sibley said "all childbirth is natural." So, you either had a vaginal birth or a c-section.

Hate to say it, because I am NOT a judgmental "everyone must do the same thing" type of person, but c'mon, you know that a c-section is not "natural!" Natural, in this case, means unadulterated by medical procedure. The strictest interpretation means no drugs (things that alter the way the body works) whatsoever. Some folks will say a pitocin birth, if the mom did not have an epidural "natural" childbirth, but it probably isn't. But who cares? Did you have a happy healthy child and feel good about your birth? Then you had a GOOD birth, and isn't that what matters more than objecting to factual description of someone else's birth?

Signed, someone whose natural childbirth was actually natural, but doesn't think it was better than anyone else's.

You are EXACTLY what is annoying about "natural childbirth" people. You say "who cares?" but also go on for 4 sentences about what you deem as the only interpretation of natural childbirth. Who cares?, you ask. You do, apparently.

Also agree with another PP re: the "EBF" designation. We get it. You are superior - or at least feel that way. Duly noted.

Oh my goodness. Get over yourself! Here's a summary, since you find four sentences to be some edict on my superiority vs. yours:

Natural = drug free, it's not an opinion thing, it's a fact thing.
EBF designation = important for discussing issues related to feeding, such as gas, mom's diet, potential allergies, etc. If I "supplement" with formula, then my the doctor wants to know it. People trying to help on a feeding issue can also use that knowledge.

Why do facts offend you?

The definition of "natural" is not drug free. That's the connotation, as relates to childbirth. And slavish adherence to it is yet another way that one group of women attempts to categorize themselves as having done something better than another group of women. Insisting on the need for women who had c-sections to know they had an unnatural birth = epic feminist fail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:.

Natural = drug free, it's not an opinion thing, it's a fact thing.

Really? It's a fact thing? Like gravity is a fact?

Sorry, it's an opinion. Natural childbirth does not only equal drug free. You'd like to co-opt the word "natural" and apply it only to your preferred means of birthing, but that doesn't make it true. Calling unmedicated childbirth "natural" implies that all other forms of childbirth are unnatural.

Seeing a doctor is unnatural. Giving birth in a hospital or birthing center is unnatural. You want "natural", go birth in the woods. And then gnaw through you baby's umbilical cord.

Wow, negative! You say I'm what's "wrong" with the natural childbirth people, yet you're the one being mean-spirited. Why? Your statement on "natural" meaning the same thing as "unassisted childbirth" is inaccurate as well as rude. Natural can mean mid-wife assisted or even doctor-assisted (I had a doctor-assisted childbirth, so yes, perhaps mine was less "natural" than someone who birthed with a midwife at home). This has been an interesting thread so I'm going to stop engaging with you and boring everyone else. If you want the last word, take it! Or perhaps you could be convinced to argue with the dictionary instead? (See def of word natural at http://www.merriam-webster.com/netdict/natural).



Whoa there, Nelly. Could you direct me to where I said "you're what's 'wrong' with the natural childbirth people"? I guess I missed that in my post. But you crack me up! Describing your child's birth as "less natural". Do you mean "somewhat unnatural?" I mean, we must deal with FACTS here, woman! And your m-w.com definition of natural - I really enjoyed reading it, including "natural child" - meaning illegitimate bastard. Yes, yes, now I see it's definitely a fact that natural, in any reference to child or childbirth, must just be about drugs. Right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP you are so damn funny! Unicorn Dust blessed by the Goddess of Placenta?! hahaha

Best thing I've read all day. LOVE the tub full of unicorn dust blessed by the goddess of placenta. Will have to hold on to that mental image for a long while. I envision shimmery white particles. Beautiful.

[Anonymous]

Okay, "unicorn placenta dust," really? Are there only two ways to give birth? "Drugged" or "hippie?"

Now I'm being egged on by what seems like multiple posters, so I'll take the bait again. Honestly, I do not care that much about your child's birth and don't expect you to care about mine. I actually agree that anyone who is overbearing about any parenting choice, be it BFing, natural childbirthing, or AP parenting, SAH vs. WM, etc, is annoying. I don't presume my childbirth choice is right for you but if you ask me why I think it was a better choice for me, I'll tell you over a beer sometime, but only if you . Like you, I'm just trying to do the best I can for my family.

I still disagree that the natural childbirth "camp" has coopted or distorted the word "natural." I certainly have never implied that any of my numerous c-section having or epidural having friends have failed or done something creepy, as your use of the word "unnatural" implies. I merely responded to one person who said use of "natural," to differentiate between a vaginal and c-section birth, is "annoying." I think the annoying part is where a person says one type of birth is better or worse. I agree that the notion of one woman birthing better than another is, in fact, ludicrous.

I don't care if you think I am or that you are not a "natural" at effacing or dilating. Why be so rude to me? All I'm saying is that the word "natural" has a standing definition, and if you don't like it, your argument is with Webster, not me. PS. I don't really care if my kids go to Yale. Just the opposite is true, I think there is too much pressure on children to be little walking adults. I'm pro- "natural childhood" as well. (wink wink)

[Anonymous]

Whoops - I meant to say "only if you *ask*). Typos...sigh...