Weird habits of the house/houseguest

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not particularly weird, but I’m not a fan of situations where the host asks you to remove shoes and there’s no advance warning that it’s a shoe-free house and no provision of slippers. From cold feet, to holey socks, to athlete’s foot, there are a lot of reasons why some of us are more comfortable with shoes on and need some sort of heads-up if we must remove them.

This is such a common expectation now its weird to be put off by it. And as there’s so much supporting evidence of all the literal crap shoes bring in-I find shoe wearing homes gross.

This. I would never expressly ask someone to remove their shoes but I'd hope they'd be polite enough to notice our shoe shelf by our front door with everyone's everyday shoes on it, the fact that we have all removed our shoes, etc.....

They're politely assuming that you wouldn't impose your footwear choices on your guests, or that if you're really obsessive about it, you'd politely let them know beforehand.

If you notice that the hosts all have their shoes off its just rude to notice it and deliberately not follow suit out of principle (if you have plantar fasciitis, or a medical condition that causes your feet to be soaking wet with sweat like another poster claims- that's different. But most people notice and just don't feel like it because they aren't that polite. Personally I had plantar fasciitis for years and I'd always apologize in homes where the hosts were not in shoes, to show that I did notice and I really just can't take them off right now. And it was always fine.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get the not wanting shoes in your house, but my feet sweat like crazy, so I hope you don't mind me sweating all over your nice clean carpet and leaving damp footprints on your floors when I take off my shoes. This happens with or without socks, btw.

That sounds unfortunate... but yes, I do prefer that to your dirty shoes. But I'm not insane about the shoe policy and if you told me you really don't want to take your shoes off I wouldn't make you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I once stayed at a friend's house on an island in Maine where there was no electricity other than a generator. They had indoor plumbing and an outhouse, but you were expected to use the outhouse during daylight hours. With the inside toilet, you flushed only for #2. Showers were limited and if you took one, you had to turn the water on only while getting wet or rinsing off. It was different...but made me realize how wasteful our creature comforts can be sometimes.

This reminds me of staying with friends of my parents who had a boat - like a 40ft thing with a couple of cabins. They had a rule that you could only use 5 pieces of toilet paper at a time. It was fine... and I understand that the plumbing on ships is different.. but I did worry about what would happen if I really needed more!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not particularly weird, but I’m not a fan of situations where the host asks you to remove shoes and there’s no advance warning that it’s a shoe-free house and no provision of slippers. From cold feet, to holey socks, to athlete’s foot, there are a lot of reasons why some of us are more comfortable with shoes on and need some sort of heads-up if we must remove them.

This is such a common expectation now its weird to be put off by it. And as there’s so much supporting evidence of all the literal crap shoes bring in-I find shoe wearing homes gross.

This. I would never expressly ask someone to remove their shoes but I'd hope they'd be polite enough to notice our shoe shelf by our front door with everyone's everyday shoes on it, the fact that we have all removed our shoes, etc.....

They're politely assuming that you wouldn't impose your footwear choices on your guests, or that if you're really obsessive about it, you'd politely let them know beforehand.

This is like saying that hosts should let you know that they prefer that you use the serving spoon instead of just sticking your hands in the spaghetti when you come over for dinner. Its the equivalent of saying you want a heads up that you’re not supposed to wipe your hands on the tablecloth and should use the napkin provided. It’s basic manners.

Do you also need to be reminded to flush after you use the bathroom?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A group of friends stayed a family cabin in Colorado a few years ago. We are not a rowdy bunch, but the friend's parents decided to be there while we were there. Again, were all trustworthy adults, just enjoying the cabin's proximity to great hiking trails and restaurants.

Every morning, the mother would wake up early to make her own pot of coffee. Then she would make a big show of transferring it to a pot on the stove to keep it warm so we could make our coffee. We always invited her to enjoy our coffee because it was clear that we were inconveniencing her with our very presence. We were all using the same bag of coffee, so it had nothing to do with brand preferences.

We cooked a few group meals, and always invited her to join. She never joined, but would heat up a sad microwave meal or can of soup WHILE we were in the kitchen.

sooooo awkward!

[Anonymous]

I'm sad that there are 10 pages of this thread and maybe 5 responses to the question. The shoe people should have done a S/O.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not particularly weird, but I’m not a fan of situations where the host asks you to remove shoes and there’s no advance warning that it’s a shoe-free house and no provision of slippers. From cold feet, to holey socks, to athlete’s foot, there are a lot of reasons why some of us are more comfortable with shoes on and need some sort of heads-up if we must remove them.

This is such a common expectation now its weird to be put off by it. And as there’s so much supporting evidence of all the literal crap shoes bring in-I find shoe wearing homes gross.

This. I would never expressly ask someone to remove their shoes but I'd hope they'd be polite enough to notice our shoe shelf by our front door with everyone's everyday shoes on it, the fact that we have all removed our shoes, etc.....

They're politely assuming that you wouldn't impose your footwear choices on your guests, or that if you're really obsessive about it, you'd politely let them know beforehand.

This is like saying that hosts should let you know that they prefer that you use the serving spoon instead of just sticking your hands in the spaghetti when you come over for dinner. Its the equivalent of saying you want a heads up that you’re not supposed to wipe your hands on the tablecloth and should use the napkin provided. It’s basic manners.

Do you also need to be reminded to flush after you use the bathroom?

oy

seriously, you're nuts on this issue

[Anonymous]

Yes, some households are no shoes. NO, it is NOT the standard, at least not in this country. So, don't be surprised if it is a surprise to some people that they can't wear shoes in your house. It's weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, some households are no shoes. NO, it is NOT the standard, at least not in this country. So, don't be surprised if it is a surprise to some people that they can't wear shoes in your house. It's weird.

exactly! it's not weird like unheard of - like, it would be more surprising if i showed up at the house and you handed me an eggplant and told me i had to pretend it was my husband all evening. but it's not universal, or anywhere neat universal - at least not on the mainland. so just give people a heads up the first time so they can be prepared! it's not that hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get the not wanting shoes in your house, but my feet sweat like crazy, so I hope you don't mind me sweating all over your nice clean carpet and leaving damp footprints on your floors when I take off my shoes. This happens with or without socks, btw.

That sounds unfortunate... but yes, I do prefer that to your dirty shoes. But I'm not insane about the shoe policy and if you told me you really don't want to take your shoes off I wouldn't make you.

+1

It is different if someone sees the host without shoes, then walks past them with shoes out of spite. May be hard for you to fathom, but some people really are this angry about the little things. I think that is the point in a lot fo theses posts - some people have no legit reason to leave their shoes on (or not) - but they just feel like being nasty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I once stayed at a friend's house on an island in Maine where there was no electricity other than a generator. They had indoor plumbing and an outhouse, but you were expected to use the outhouse during daylight hours. With the inside toilet, you flushed only for #2. Showers were limited and if you took one, you had to turn the water on only while getting wet or rinsing off. It was different...but made me realize how wasteful our creature comforts can be sometimes.

This reminds me of staying with friends of my parents who had a boat - like a 40ft thing with a couple of cabins. They had a rule that you could only use 5 pieces of toilet paper at a time. It was fine... and I understand that the plumbing on ships is different.. but I did worry about what would happen if I really needed more!

Omg if I was restricted to 5 pieces of toilet paper I would have turned around and left immediately. No way that would fly in my world!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I once stayed at a friend's house on an island in Maine where there was no electricity other than a generator. They had indoor plumbing and an outhouse, but you were expected to use the outhouse during daylight hours. With the inside toilet, you flushed only for #2. Showers were limited and if you took one, you had to turn the water on only while getting wet or rinsing off. It was different...but made me realize how wasteful our creature comforts can be sometimes.

This reminds me of staying with friends of my parents who had a boat - like a 40ft thing with a couple of cabins. They had a rule that you could only use 5 pieces of toilet paper at a time. It was fine... and I understand that the plumbing on ships is different.. but I did worry about what would happen if I really needed more!

Omg if I was restricted to 5 pieces of toilet paper I would have turned around and left immediately. No way that would fly in my world!

I would just use very long pieces.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, some households are no shoes. NO, it is NOT the standard, at least not in this country. So, don't be surprised if it is a surprise to some people that they can't wear shoes in your house. It's weird.

exactly! it's not weird like unheard of - like, it would be more surprising if i showed up at the house and you handed me an eggplant and told me i had to pretend it was my husband all evening. but it's not universal, or anywhere neat universal - at least not on the mainland. so just give people a heads up the first time so they can be prepared! it's not that hard.

Why do you have to be told? If you walk into a house and there are shoes in the foyer or whatever and the kids, homeowner don't have shoes on follow along. Be observant and be respectful. Why is that so hard for you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, some households are no shoes. NO, it is NOT the standard, at least not in this country. So, don't be surprised if it is a surprise to some people that they can't wear shoes in your house. It's weird.

exactly! it's not weird like unheard of - like, it would be more surprising if i showed up at the house and you handed me an eggplant and told me i had to pretend it was my husband all evening. but it's not universal, or anywhere neat universal - at least not on the mainland. so just give people a heads up the first time so they can be prepared! it's not that hard.

Why do you have to be told? If you walk into a house and there are shoes in the foyer or whatever and the kids, homeowner don't have shoes on follow along. Be observant and be respectful. Why is that so hard for you?

+1

Grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sad that there are 10 pages of this thread and maybe 5 responses to the question. The shoe people should have done a S/O.

But what about my plantar fasciitis emotional support dog? That’s a very important issue!