I never understood the difference between public and private until today

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:What left you awestruck?

The facility for starters.
I just toured the lower campus for preschool through 8th. It had 2 gymnasiums, a pool, amazing art and music studios. All children take up an instrument. The science lab space is amazing, and they are expanding to a new innovative stem center. There is crazy fabrication shop. All kids take Spanish and Mandarin. The library has fireplaces.
It was magical
I toured Hogwarts.

this is precisely why i didn't want my kids in the private school. it's a school, not a resort. they don't need any of those facilities.

Fireplaces in the library, sure, that’s unnecessary. But you think they don’t need a science lab, gym, or spaces to learn art and music?

OP specifically referred to the difference between public and private.
a gym - sure. two gyms are not necessary. not all children should be taking up instruments (long story but as someone who played an instrument semi-seriously this is BS)
you don't need "new innovative stem center". American science education is way too much hands on. If you want to be better in physics you need more math, no more labs
etc etc
I prefer school to have a bit of an ascetic vibe. school is not a place where "fun" should be the primary objective

If you prefer that, great. I think most parents want their kids to get a well-rounded education in a way that sparks their interest. And I disagree with your characterization that if education is made interesting, that “fun is the primary objective”.

if education is any good it won't be all that fun or interesting. Americans don't understand that which is why their edu is so atrocious for the money spent.

I truly feel sorry for you if you think that education or the acquisition of knowledge should not be interesting to the pupil. What country were you educated in?

I was educated in a much poorer country and then came to the US and kicked ass at Harvard. you can't buy knowledge and even if you could facilities are the last thing that needs investment.

And yet you don’t feel that education is something that should interest the student?

it's complicated. interest is something that is acquired not something that comes naturally. when you delve into a topic it will most likely interest you. but american style cutesy textbooks and hands on games that are supposed to spark interest are distractions that make it harder to dig deeper and develop actual interest.

also, most people/children are not smart enough to be truly interested in academic subjects. this is not a slight against them - most academic subjects are esoteric, abstract and way too complex for most people. america's system is way too focused on average and below average performers who will never really master academic knowledge. meanwhile the brightest students are sufficiently challenged especially in math. and yet the solution is always more money, more computer, more facilities, more crap.

So your children attend public school? Private?

[Anonymous]

I'm gonna agree with PP to some degree that interest in acquired. I can't comment on whether it's right to teach in a style that isn't motivating but I will say having studied piano with some big names who are classical recording artists, I had a very strong education in music. I'm not a concert pianist and I went to a combo of public (tops in my state/county)/private schools personally. I will say that based on my experience in learning piano - to some degree it's about practice. I see all these posts from parents about dropping their kids from the instrument after like 2-3 months or even 6 months and being disappointed about that. Well, you have to learn the basics before you can really decide whether you love it. Takes some time and you have to force the practice. It's not about inspiration - you have to know what you're playing before you know if you like the piece. Many just give up or think that you love it so you practice. Discipline is more important that inspiration sometimes.

I'm also the child of 2 immigrant parents who early on explained to me that the teaching style overseas is very different than it is in the US and they both admired and envied that I was given a chance to "enjoy" my studies because the way they learned their lessons was by cold hard studying. You have to get the basics down before you can leverage that knowledge and gain the interest to delve into it. So yes, I do agree that a lot of public schools is about fluff. Here in the US, there's a great emphasis on independence, freedom and choice. But there's no responsibility and no discipline that comes with it. When you go to other parts of the world, there's less choice. You just do. There's no other way. There's an urgency and a commitment and that's why many immigrants or families who emigrated to the US succeed so often. It's not about how much you'll enjoy your studies, it's about needing to have a foundation of knowledge in order to develop further.

My kids go to public (people love it but it's not considered a Nottingham LOL or other high ranked academic elementary - maybe a 6/10). I personally struggle more than DH on whether we will actually finish in our current school. I have always supplement school work. We read every night with the younger and we take turns reading pages with older. We started as babies and they both love to read. We make the older one write in a journal, we've always worked math above his current grade level to introduce him to what's to come. The younger one listens in on the older's work. Both kids are 2 grades above their current grade level in school work. It does take more time for me and I am more exhausted and I'm not the perfect mom and I can't do it every night but I feel very strongly about always giving more than assigned work and also paying very close attention to the kind of school work they are doing in class because I have such little faith in the school system.

I personally feel that school's a hard one. It's a hard thing to weigh that a school has the right teachers, community, personality fit for your kid but also academically is actually teaching them shit. On some level, I have toured the privates and fell in love with them but don't have the money and can't get the scholarships to get them in, but wish I could. But in the end, I think that they are happy, we will continue to supplement and my hope is that they find something in their life to do that they love. Ultimately, that's going to determine how well they do what they do and for success, $, etc. But yes, when I became a parent, I realized that US education is messed up. The kids do on some level have to learn. It's a fine line and I think PP admits that it's tricky to go deep without too much comfort in learning, and yet to not be well rounded in studying more than academics like music, art, etc isn't right either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If money were no object, I would move to a place with great public schools I didn’t have to Lotto to get into.

The social effects of exposure to the “great facilities” at such a young age are not what I want for my kid.

Would you mind elaborating on the social effects of great facilities.

Entitlement. Distance from the lived experience of most age peers. Inability to navigate, or discomfort when navigating, circumstances that do not meet physical plant expectations and attendant social norms. Lack of comprehension of the vast and growing gap between the ultra-rich and everyone else in the US.

I teach college students, so I’ve seen all of these coming through. I was in college myself when I first met a kid whose parents bought a major work of modern art (and by “major” I mean Matisse) for each kid’s birth. I would rather my kid not encounter that until a similar age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If money were no object, I would move to a place with great public schools I didn’t have to Lotto to get into.

The social effects of exposure to the “great facilities” at such a young age are not what I want for my kid.

Would you mind elaborating on the social effects of great facilities.

Entitlement. Distance from the lived experience of most age peers. Inability to navigate, or discomfort when navigating, circumstances that do not meet physical plant expectations and attendant social norms. Lack of comprehension of the vast and growing gap between the ultra-rich and everyone else in the US.

I teach college students, so I’ve seen all of these coming through. I was in college myself when I first met a kid whose parents bought a major work of modern art (and by “major” I mean Matisse) for each kid’s birth. I would rather my kid not encounter that until a similar age.

I tend to agree. I work with someone who went to a prestigious private school in the DC area. I am amazed how ignorant she can be at times. One time, she decided that she didn't want to go to a restaurant because she saw on yelp that most of the patrons were black.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If money were no object, I would move to a place with great public schools I didn’t have to Lotto to get into.

The social effects of exposure to the “great facilities” at such a young age are not what I want for my kid.

Would you mind elaborating on the social effects of great facilities.

Entitlement. Distance from the lived experience of most age peers. Inability to navigate, or discomfort when navigating, circumstances that do not meet physical plant expectations and attendant social norms. Lack of comprehension of the vast and growing gap between the ultra-rich and everyone else in the US.

I teach college students, so I’ve seen all of these coming through. I was in college myself when I first met a kid whose parents bought a major work of modern art (and by “major” I mean Matisse) for each kid’s birth. I would rather my kid not encounter that until a similar age.

I tend to agree. I work with someone who went to a prestigious private school in the DC area. I am amazed how ignorant she can be at times. One time, she decided that she didn't want to go to a restaurant because she saw on yelp that most of the patrons were black.

The op specifically states that the Private school is much more diverse than the public option.

[Anonymous]

Diversity of race and ethnicity is not the same as diversity of lived experience. It’s important, but it’s not everything.

And some of the most carefully cultivated “diverse” schools can be pretty socially and emotionally toxic to the “diverse” people in them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm gonna agree with PP to some degree that interest in acquired. I can't comment on whether it's right to teach in a style that isn't motivating but I will say having studied piano with some big names who are classical recording artists, I had a very strong education in music. I'm not a concert pianist and I went to a combo of public (tops in my state/county)/private schools personally. I will say that based on my experience in learning piano - to some degree it's about practice. I see all these posts from parents about dropping their kids from the instrument after like 2-3 months or even 6 months and being disappointed about that. Well, you have to learn the basics before you can really decide whether you love it. Takes some time and you have to force the practice. It's not about inspiration - you have to know what you're playing before you know if you like the piece. Many just give up or think that you love it so you practice. Discipline is more important that inspiration sometimes.

I'm also the child of 2 immigrant parents who early on explained to me that the teaching style overseas is very different than it is in the US and they both admired and envied that I was given a chance to "enjoy" my studies because the way they learned their lessons was by cold hard studying. You have to get the basics down before you can leverage that knowledge and gain the interest to delve into it. So yes, I do agree that a lot of public schools is about fluff. Here in the US, there's a great emphasis on independence, freedom and choice. But there's no responsibility and no discipline that comes with it. When you go to other parts of the world, there's less choice. You just do. There's no other way. There's an urgency and a commitment and that's why many immigrants or families who emigrated to the US succeed so often. It's not about how much you'll enjoy your studies, it's about needing to have a foundation of knowledge in order to develop further.

My kids go to public (people love it but it's not considered a Nottingham LOL or other high ranked academic elementary - maybe a 6/10). I personally struggle more than DH on whether we will actually finish in our current school. I have always supplement school work. We read every night with the younger and we take turns reading pages with older. We started as babies and they both love to read. We make the older one write in a journal, we've always worked math above his current grade level to introduce him to what's to come. The younger one listens in on the older's work. Both kids are 2 grades above their current grade level in school work. It does take more time for me and I am more exhausted and I'm not the perfect mom and I can't do it every night but I feel very strongly about always giving more than assigned work and also paying very close attention to the kind of school work they are doing in class because I have such little faith in the school system.

I personally feel that school's a hard one. It's a hard thing to weigh that a school has the right teachers, community, personality fit for your kid but also academically is actually teaching them shit. On some level, I have toured the privates and fell in love with them but don't have the money and can't get the scholarships to get them in, but wish I could. But in the end, I think that they are happy, we will continue to supplement and my hope is that they find something in their life to do that they love. Ultimately, that's going to determine how well they do what they do and for success, $, etc. But yes, when I became a parent, I realized that US education is messed up. The kids do on some level have to learn. It's a fine line and I think PP admits that it's tricky to go deep without too much comfort in learning, and yet to not be well rounded in studying more than academics like music, art, etc isn't right either.

I agree in all accounts and am from HK.
But you also seem to be stating that you’d prefer private school to public school for your children, if financially possible. Why is that? It is play-based or progressive in most cases in the early years....

[Anonymous]

I went to Exeter. My children go to a Title I DCPS. So I know what you mean. I'd switch them in middle or high school if I could afford it. It really is a different world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to Exeter. My children go to a Title I DCPS. So I know what you mean. I'd switch them in middle or high school if I could afford it. It really is a different world.

Ok...
This is what we want to hear about.
I’m the OP of this thread, and I had sort of given up here. Posters are having a really hard time with time with the money aspect of this discussion. I don’t need a cost benefit analysis. The cost is not the issue.
If money wasn’t an issue, would you have them in private starting in pre K and continuing all the way through?
Do you see a benefit to their DCPS title 1 school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to Exeter. My children go to a Title I DCPS. So I know what you mean. I'd switch them in middle or high school if I could afford it. It really is a different world.

Ok...
This is what we want to hear about.
I’m the OP of this thread, and I had sort of given up here. Posters are having a really hard time with time with the money aspect of this discussion. I don’t need a cost benefit analysis. The cost is not the issue.
If money wasn’t an issue, would you have them in private starting in pre K and continuing all the way through?
Do you see a benefit to their DCPS title 1 school?

No, we wouldn't since privates pick and choose their kids. They should just have lottery and then show what kind of education they can can give to all their kids. Not only do they pick and choose, but they also have the money to impress the parents with their grounds and facilities. We won't try for privates, but I think our kid would make the cut because he is a minority, speaks 3 languages and we are fairly low income. I don't want my kid to be the one who makes the school look more diverse.
Dc will go to DCPS and maybe VA public schools later since we work in Va and might move there one day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to Exeter. My children go to a Title I DCPS. So I know what you mean. I'd switch them in middle or high school if I could afford it. It really is a different world.

Ok...
This is what we want to hear about.
I’m the OP of this thread, and I had sort of given up here. Posters are having a really hard time with time with the money aspect of this discussion. I don’t need a cost benefit analysis. The cost is not the issue.
If money wasn’t an issue, would you have them in private starting in pre K and continuing all the way through?
Do you see a benefit to their DCPS title 1 school?

No, we wouldn't since privates pick and choose their kids. They should just have lottery and then show what kind of education they can can give to all their kids. Not only do they pick and choose, but they also have the money to impress the parents with their grounds and facilities. We won't try for privates, but I think our kid would make the cut because he is a minority, speaks 3 languages and we are fairly low income. I don't want my kid to be the one who makes the school look more diverse.
Dc will go to DCPS and maybe VA public schools later since we work in Va and might move there one day.

Didn’t you just write that you would switch in middle if you could afford it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to Exeter. My children go to a Title I DCPS. So I know what you mean. I'd switch them in middle or high school if I could afford it. It really is a different world.

Ok...
This is what we want to hear about.
I’m the OP of this thread, and I had sort of given up here. Posters are having a really hard time with time with the money aspect of this discussion. I don’t need a cost benefit analysis. The cost is not the issue.
If money wasn’t an issue, would you have them in private starting in pre K and continuing all the way through?
Do you see a benefit to their DCPS title 1 school?

you sound dumb; no wonder you are impressed by bells and whistles.
many people with money still wouldn't sent their kids to a private school and they are giving you their reasons.

[Anonymous]

OP, you won't get consensus on your new POV, because there isn't consensus, nor is there one right answer for everyone. People make different choices all the time. Just make yours and live with it. You don't need DCUM to support your decision and justify your choice. You want the bells and whistles, so go get them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to Exeter. My children go to a Title I DCPS. So I know what you mean. I'd switch them in middle or high school if I could afford it. It really is a different world.

Ok...
This is what we want to hear about.
I’m the OP of this thread, and I had sort of given up here. Posters are having a really hard time with time with the money aspect of this discussion. I don’t need a cost benefit analysis. The cost is not the issue.
If money wasn’t an issue, would you have them in private starting in pre K and continuing all the way through?
Do you see a benefit to their DCPS title 1 school?

you sound dumb; no wonder you are impressed by bells and whistles.
many people with money still wouldn't sent their kids to a private school and they are giving you their reasons.

Have they? I’ve read people say, “ ifwe had the money we wouldn’t” “ if my child was accepted”
It makes me think people don’t entertain the idea simply because it isn’t an option.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to Exeter. My children go to a Title I DCPS. So I know what you mean. I'd switch them in middle or high school if I could afford it. It really is a different world.

Ok...
This is what we want to hear about.
I’m the OP of this thread, and I had sort of given up here. Posters are having a really hard time with time with the money aspect of this discussion. I don’t need a cost benefit analysis. The cost is not the issue.
If money wasn’t an issue, would you have them in private starting in pre K and continuing all the way through?
Do you see a benefit to their DCPS title 1 school?

you sound dumb; no wonder you are impressed by bells and whistles.
many people with money still wouldn't sent their kids to a private school and they are giving you their reasons.

Have they? I’ve read people say, “ ifwe had the money we wouldn’t” “ if my child was accepted”
It makes me think people don’t entertain the idea simply because it isn’t an option.

there were many different responses that gave you many reasons. but you seem dead set on believe that everyone who could do it would do it. so keep thinking that. private schools are created for stupid people like you.