This happened to my father, who is in his 80s. I wish he would give up television and interact more with people, but he just won't. Always was a stubborn man (which may be how he got to be so wealthy), but now in his senility he is even more so. |
Forget your meds? Cuz you're getting delusional again. |
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My wife kind of stunned me the other day when she told me that if Trump (or Cruz) wins, we are moving out of the country. I think that's a little radical (and unpatriotic), and I at least persuaded her that we didn't need to go beyond Canada.
Ordinarily I think I'm the bigger liberal in our marriage, but it was her idea. She never liked it when I said the base of the GOP was basically a bunch of xenophobic bigots (I am from the south, and actually do have real Confederate ancestors) - people the GOP had been cultivating since Nixon's days - mostly because some of her relatives are GOPers (her dad made the comment to me that "the whole problem started with civil rights") But she grew up in NoVa in the late 80s and 90s and has a lot of friends from high school, college and grad school and now professional colleagues who are Muslims - particularly South Asians, but a few middle easterners (one is a Syrian who has done volunteer work in Turkey on his vacations), and she's really really surprised (I'm not) and disturbed. I guess she is surprised, because so many South Asian Muslims are pro-business, anti-tax, religious conservatives (Piyush Jindal is not an outlier) - see today's NYT about how that's working out. I thought she was kidding me about moving but she brought it up again two days later to remind me she is serious. I wasn't serious but told her I would be supportive. I guess I'm relieved that basically I don't think there's any way in hell these Know-Knothings will win (and I once again give thanks we have a rational, reality based adult with his hands on the levers - thank you President Obama!), but if Trump gets the nomination and wins, I'll be the shocked one, and yeah, Montreal or Toronto: here we come! Her family, who are, I suspect, closet Trump supporters, will be upset if we move so far away, particularly for that reason; my family will be bummed about missing out on the grandkid, but are very supportive of at least short-term expat living. |
. Very intellectually challenged to blame everything on Fox. Do you gave no understanding of the aging process, the fear that comes from a loss of your sense if security ad you become more frail and weaker, the fear that comes from rapid changes in the way of life you have always known, the rapid change in the norms of society, financial, health and enpetional stressors, depression, etc--but hey, let's blame it all on Fox News. I saw all of this with my aging relatives long before there was a Fox News. Geez. Are people incapable of mature thought these days? |
| Wasn't Cruz born in Canada, and only gave up his dual citizenship a few years ago? Doesn't one have to be native born (US military bases and territories count) to be constitutionally eligible to be president?? |
Not according to legal scholars--of both political persuasion. |
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Your husband sounds intelligent and probably has his family’s best interests in mind, OP.
And, likely, you are not deserving of him. I am not a Trump supporter, but I totally understand how his supporters feel. |
Trolls going to troll - "not deserving" from a few sentences, you must be kidding. |
You must have been born an American citizen. Two Americans on vacation in Ireland still have an American baby, though; it doesn't matter where you were born. |
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OP, the solution is easy. You are not voting for Trump, right? So you are going to negate Dh's vote (not that I think trump will get the nomination).
So don't worry about it. |
. Fox News also hates him. |
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OP - I feel for you. This is a very real issue and it is one I have in my marriage as well, although I believe my husband is a Cruz supporter. Horrifying as I am a moderate democrat. He turned right wing around the time Obama was elected. We have had some very difficult years, lots of trying to understand the others point of view, but eventually we decided that to stay married, we had to stay quiet about politics and agree to disagree. It is a very sad situation, and we are raising a family and are somewhat happy, but the issue lies beneath the surface. As it does with relationships with other immediate family members who lean either left or right - in our family it is pretty evenly split.
I would love to hear how others cope with this situation. I think at the end of the day, the problem I have is values and respect. Cruz and Trump - I honestly do not see their appeal, what they stand for frightens me and I can not understand how people support them, but people that I love do. I blame this on right wing media and the brainwashing of Fox News and talk radio. |
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Maybe you can have one of those conversations where one person does the talking, and the other repeats what that person said more or less to demonstrate that you're really listening (not debating).
You might find that, in fact, your husband isn't a racist azzhole, or maybe not as big as you might fear, rather that he's afraid for his family and his job and he thinks that XYZ policy--however badly articulated--is the best thing for the country. I mean, I don't know. I married a lefty Canadian, but we disagree on certain aspects of corporate policies, especially those that pertain to his specific company. Whatevs. I tell him I no longer try to convince him of my point of view, but I will explain it if he cares to know what I'm thinking (without agreeing with all or part of it), and I'm happy to listen to him, too. When the temperature rises, we revert to that trick of paraphrasing back what the other person said to demonstrate that we are listening. It helps keep the peace, when necessary. |
| Hillary is beyond thrilled right now. If Trump OR Cruz gets the nomination, its Hillary's to lose. Hope all her skeleton's are out of the closet by now. |
| The fact that we are free to hold varying political beliefs is on of the things that make this country great. Why would anyone feel threatened or think politics is worth destroying a family? It all comes down to respecting someones right to belief something different that you even if you do not respect that belief. Anything else is extremely controlling and reflects negatively on that individual. |